thed Page 46 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Lionel Messi Couldn't Hide Being Shocked When Barcelona Found Themselves Down 1-0 To Celtic
Barcelona's home leg of their UEFA Champions League tie with Celtic was supposed to be easy—let Barça's superstars overwhelm the Scottish champs and build an early lead. That isn't how it worked, though, as a 17th-minute Celtic goal silenced the Camp Nou crowd—and superstar Lionel Messi. Barça woul...
The Flesh-Eating Turf Monster Victimized Matt Stafford Last Night
The Bears knocked off the Lions 13-7 last night in a mess of a football game that dropped the hapless and hopeless Lions to 2-4 on the season. Detroit quarterback Matt Stafford had an especially bad night, struggling to find open receivers and managing meager statistics: 28 of 46 for 261 yards. Her...
Stevie Johnson Learned The Hard Way That Celebrating A Touchdown With Fans Can Be Dangerous
Stevie Johnson—whose post-touchdown exploits we've featured before—found the end zone yesterday for the first time since Week 3, and gave Buffalo the lead in a wacky game very few people saw live. Unfortunately for Bills fans, they blew the lead in the fourth quarter and lost 35-34 to Tennessee, dr...
Captain Greenbeard Invites You Upon His Ship, The <em>S.S. Acid Flashback</em>
Oregon continued on its path of destruction last night, obliterating Todd Graham's Arizona State team in Tempe in a game that wasn't near as close as the score might indicate. It brought a smile to the face of Ducks fans who ventured into the Valley of the Sun, this gentleman in particular who we'r...
Fox Needs To Update Their St. Louis Stock Footage, As Last Night's NLCS Closing Shot Featured A "Go Pujols" Sign
As Fox ended its broadcast of a much-delayed ending to last night's NLCS Game 3, a curious thing seemed to scroll across the gaudy videoboard atop the Lumière Place casino: "GO PUJOLS." While it's possible the person in charge of such messages never learned of the slugger's exit from the Cardinals ...
The New York Yankees Have A Coke Problem
Detroit reliever Phil Coke put up pedestrian pitching numbers this year; a 4.00 ERA and 1.65 WHIP while averaging less than a strikeout an inning won't get the ladies into much of a sweat—especially in the AL Central, where the only decent hitting could be found on Coke's own team....
If Ever A Moment Called For Facepalm, It's Philip Rivers Last Night
How do you blow a 24-0 halftime lead? Account for six turnovers, as Philip Rivers did last night in guiding the Chargers to a 35-24 final score, and you might just do it. To say it was laughable is an understatement, though most of us were, indeed, laughing. (Hopefully after the final interception—...
Aaron Rodgers Threw For Six Touchdowns, But It Was A.J. Hawk's Performance That Was Truly Shocking
The NFL's ongoing effort to combat breast cancer by wearing colorful clothing continues, and Packers linebacker A.J. Hawk was happy to take part in repping the pink during last night's 42-24 dominance by Green Bay in Houston, and, wow, that score's not just a palindrome but the number two paired wi...
Ben Roethlisberger Is Not Impressed
Tennessee upset Pittsburgh last night in a Thursday Night Football game full of exciting field goals and the sort of play that led most viewers to seek out more compelling sports TV on TBS or TNT. A last-second field goal by Rob Bironas—his fourth of the game—locked things up for the Titans, and a ...
TBS's Slogan Is "Very Funny," Which Is Fitting Because Its Baseball Analysis Is A Joke
The MLB playoff coverage on TBS has suffered the arrows of critics for years, and it hasn't really shown any signs of improvement. How the same company that can produce the brilliant Inside the NBA drops the ball so terribly with MLB coverage is a mystery, but there's no questioning the wide range ...
Hockey, Everybody!
We noted yesterday there is indeed professional hockey being played, and much of it can actually be watched on television! ESPN2 aired the much-anticipated Lev-Dynamo game, one claimed by Moscow after Alexander Ovechkin seized a mishandled puck and tucked it in for the game's only goal....
The TBS Sound Level Meter Readings Were Thrown Off By The Loudness Of Craig Sager's Suit
In an attempt to demonstrate the madness at Camden Yards late in last night's Orioles win over the Yankees, foppish TBS reporter Craig Sager wielded a sound pressure gauge, informing viewers that the crowd in Baltimore was even louder than the famously-vocal Thunder crowd in Oklahoma City. We have ...
Last Night's Massive Sounders-Timbers Match Featured A Tifo Worthy Of The Occasion
Seattle dispatched rivals Portland 3-0 before a crowd of 66,452 at CenturyLink Field last night, retaining the Cascadia Cup in the Emerald City for at least a few more weeks and leading coach Sigi Schmid to respond, "This is what heaven must be like."...
If Only For A Moment, Lane Kiffin Was Panicked
While USC cruised to a 38-28 win over Utah in Salt Lake City last night—scoring 28 unanswered points along the way—things did not start out smoothly for the Trojans. Back-to-back turnovers on the first two drives set the Utes up for easy scores, and Utah jumped out to a 14-0 lead before a rowdy, if...
Daily Screencap Classic: J-E-S-T JEST JEST JEST
The 2-2 Jets, mired in a trench of poor quarterback play and idiots screaming for Tebow, added to that the reeling feeling of learning Santonio Holmes would be missing the rest of the season....
"You Can't Talk Enough Tebow": ESPN's Instructions To On-Air Talent
Doug Gottlieb, the former ESPN Radio host now bound for CBS, did an exit interview on The Dan Patrick Show today and confirmed what we all suspected. But to hear it spelled out this explicitly? Hoo boy. The symbiotic relationship between ESPN and Tebow is fertilized by orders from above, according t...
We're Not Sure Where "Milwaulke" Is, But Perhaps North Of "Chaigoh"
This is actually from last week, though provided the opportunity (and being out of town) we're running it today. This is one of the more curious spelling errors, as it's not a simple transposition of letters but the introduction of ones that don't belong there in the first place....
C'Mon, Man!
Remember when NFL Primetime was the shit? I know it may be difficult to imagine a time in which Chris Berman wasn't an intolerable blowhard, but indeed back in the days when the NFL's Sunday night game found ESPN home Berman was, simply, a tolerable blowhard....
Did These Fans Think The U.S. Would Hold Onto The Ryder Cup Lead? Neigh
We're used to seeing jackasses in horse masks in Louisville at the Kentucky Derby or occasionally at Notre Dame football games, where (really and truly) they are drunker than any other stadium....
Brett Favre's Undefeated Coaching Record Is Over Thanks To This Hail Mary That Elicited Redneck Euphoria
Brett Favre's post-playing career as a high school offensive coordinator found the spotlight of national cable television last night, as his undefeated Oak Grove team took on Petal in a bout of Mississippi heavyweights. It didn't go so well for our favorite text messager, as Favre's squad struggled...