ti Page 1065 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
White Sox Announcer: "We Have No Budget Left For The Second Half Of The Season"
While discussing how he bribed people to say nice things to color man Steve Stone on his birthday during the top of the first inning of tonight’s tilt against the Seattle Mariners, Chicago White Sox play-by-play man Jason Benetti admitted that the team had run out of money for the announcing team to...
Asshole Hoaxes Hundreds Of Job Seekers Into Attending Raiders Stadium-Board Meeting
If you lived in Las Vegas and were looking for a construction job, you might have been thrilled to read the flyer below, which promises “JOBS!!! JOBS!!! JOBS!!!” of both the union and non-union variety, to “black men and women” in particular. The flyer declared that if you, the job seeker, showed up...
Track Athlete Blamed "Frequent And Passionate" Kissing For Failed Drug Test
In June, an independent arbitrator cleared U.S. track athlete Gil Roberts of wrongdoing after he tested positive for a banned substance in March, though few details of the case were made public. Now, thankfully, the USADA has released the report in all its glory for our collective enjoyment and know...
Dennis Smith Jr. Is An Athletic Marvel
You’d be foolish to take away too much from how a rookie plays in NBA Summer League. Sometimes future stars like Damian Lillard can announce themselves with huge Summer League performances, but for every Lillard there are a dozen Donte Greenes who show out on the small stage then quickly fade away o...
So You Know How To Win. Why Should You?
I’ve been thinking a lot about the following tweet, by, I gather, some Democratic Party-aligned liberal guy who writes for something called Shareblue, since it was posted yesterday. It makes me feel extremely bummed out and lost:...
Jesus Walked On Water; Tim Tebow Hit A Seventh-Inning Walk-Off Homer<em></em><em></em>
Freshly promoted to high Class-A baseball, Tim Tebow has been hitting the ball better than ever before. In his previous stop with the low Class-A Columbia Fireflies, he hit just .220. The former QB is hitting .326 at the moment with the St. Lucie Mets, and this evening he produced his most sanctifie...
How Frank Rich Became The Butcher Of Broadway
This story original appeared in the June, 1990 issue of GQ and appears here with the author’s permission....
This Wimbledon Doubles Point Is Basically <i>Wii Tennis</i>
If you’re used to watching singles tennis, or no tennis at all, the above may be unrecognizable....
<i>Game Of Thrones</i> Is Increasingly Incoherent And Somehow Still Magical<em></em>
This is the time of year when I stretch myself across a bubbling lava pit in agony, unwilling to give up my foothold on either side, for I both love and hate Game of Thrones....
What's The Dumbest Movie That Has Made You Cry?
A couple years ago I was on a flight home from Panama and by great fortune, Space Jam was available on the seat-back entertainment thingy. I hadn’t seen it in the 20 years since it came out (yes, 20!), and thought to myself, hell yeah. ...
*GRUNT*
All-Star Game starter Max Scherzer was hot on the Fox mic during his scoreless first inning—and, given his expressive vocalizing, maybe just plain hot. *GRUNT*...
How Up-And-Coming Runner Hannah Fields Found Her Groove
Carolyn Helker’s daughter, Hannah, is quite competitive. She gets that from her father, Eddy. When Hannah was young, her dad coached her soccer team and challenged the kids to juggle a soccer ball 100 times. Knob-kneed and determined, Hannah did it. Then he sweetened the deal, saying he’d pay anyone...
This New Batch Of <i>Kevin Can Wait </i>Fan Theories Is Truly Unbelievable
After a lengthy layoff, the nation’s favorite TV show is coming back, and with it, the return of intense fan scrutiny, wild theorizing, and mass pandemonium....
Bryce Harper Has An Idea To Spice Up The All-Star Game
Tonight will be the first All-Star Game in 14 years that won’t decide home-field advantage for the World Series (thank goodness), and with the freedom of again having a true exhibition, MLB has the opportunity to get experimental, if it wants. Bryce Harper has a plan:...
Wrestler Alberto Del Rio Part Of Police Investigation Into Possible Domestic Violence
Professional wrestler Jose Alberto Rodriguez, better known as current Global Force Wrestling Champion Alberto El Patron and formerly Alberto Del Rio in WWE, is being investigated for possible domestic violence Sunday at the Orlando International Airport. Citing witnesses who said they saw an argumen...
Miguel Cabrera Is, Frankly, Sick And Tired Of Your Trade Rumors
The upcoming trade deadline sees the Tigers in the same narrative that’s been chasing them for years—the window is swinging shut for a roster of aging stars on huge contracts, and this can be the time to deal. The front office has made no secret of their desire to cut payroll while the team’s big na...
Gymnast's Parents Sue U.S. Olympic Committee For Alleged Abuse Of Their Daughter By Larry Nassar
The parents of a former elite-level gymnast are suing the U.S. Olympic Committee and USA Gymnastics for their part in an “orchestrated scheme ... to suppress and conceal their knowledge of know sexual abusers in the USAG program, including Dr. Larry Nassar.” The lawsuit is the first to name the Olym...
Former USA Gymnastics Doctor Will Plead Guilty To Federal Child Pornography Charges
Larry Nassar, the former USA Gymnastics and Michigan State physician, will appear in federal court in Grand Rapids, Mich., tomorrow to plead guilty to three charges related to receipt and possession of child pornography and the destruction and concealment of records. ...