ti Page 1518 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Stranded Carnival Cruise Ship's Toilets Are So Full Of Shit They Are Falling Off The Walls, And Other Gross Details From Someone Aboard
Jayme Lamm—freelance sportswriter and proprietor of TheBlondeSide.com—is currently stranded aboard the Carnival Triumph, a cruise ship that has been without power for four days after an engine room fire. We've received sporadic dispatches from her over the past few days via text message, and she's ...

Will Eating Decades-Old Athlete Candy Bars Kill You? A Taste Test
"You're not going to eat it, are you?" the eBay seller asked, after we had completed our purchase. "People have been asking me if they can eat it, and that's probably not a good idea."...

This TV News Anchor Just Keeps Doing An Inadvertent Blowjob Pantomime
Global Saskatoon proudly trumpets the program hosted by anchor Lisa Dutton and weather specialist Kevin Stanfield as "Saskatoon's #1 Morning Newscast." This video is just a taste, but it does demonstrate the show's enthusiasm for having its hands wrapped around some of the hardest news in Canada....

This Move By Rockets Rookie Donatas Motiejunas Belongs In An AND1 Mixtape
OK, so he probably didn't do this on purpose, but we still can't help but be impressed by Motiejunas's deployment of the old throw-the-ball-off-some-poor-sap's-shoulder move during last night's Rockets-Clippers game. Blinded by the brilliance of the trick, the Clippers' defenders could do nothing ...

Basketball Legend John Salley Is Here Right Now To Answer Your Questions
Most of you probably know John Salley from his 2009 breakout performance in Confessions of a Shopaholic. But — as it turns out — John is actually a really famous, and incredibly accomplished basketball superstar. "Four championship rings, with three different teams, in three different decades and t...

The Fighting Illini Ticket Office Chose An Unfortunate Picture To Advertise The Penn State Game
Illinois's ticket office sent this email blast out to its fans early this morning—view the full email online here, while it lasts—as a Valentine's Day promotion. The team beat Purdue by 20 at home last night, and so it's trying to move tickets to its next home game, against the woeful Nittany Lions....

Nike Oscar Pistorius Ad: "I Am The Bullet In The Chamber"
Until recently, this advertisement reportedly appeared on Oscar Pistorius's website. Since being charged with shooting and killing his girlfriend early Thursday morning, the ad has been removed....
![Double-Amputee Track Star Oscar Pistorius Charged With Shooting, Killing His Girlfriend [UPDATES]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18em6z4e1lcihjpg.jpg)
Double-Amputee Track Star Oscar Pistorius Charged With Shooting, Killing His Girlfriend [UPDATES]
Details are thin, but according to reports out of Johannesburg, Oscar Pistorius, the double-amputee Olympic and Paralympic sprinter, mistakenly took his girlfriend for a burglar and fatally shot her in the head and arm early Thursday morning. ...

Valentine's Day Special: The Movie Couples That Don't Belong Together
We've never quite understood the appeal of going to movies for Valentine's Day. Movie-watching is, after all, a solitary activity in which a person sits in the dark staring straight ahead in silence for two hours. But people do it anyway. Perhaps that's because romance is the central activity of rou...

ESPN.com Has Officially Run Out Of Poll Ideas
Everyone go home....

My Encounters With Ray Lewis's Deer-Antler Hookup, The Man Who Could Change The History Of Sports (Or Something)
"You're on the phone with someone who could change the history of sports," said Deer Antler Man....
![Disgruntled Goalie Scores On His Own Net, Flips Off Coaches, Skates Off The Ice Forever [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Disgruntled Goalie Scores On His Own Net, Flips Off Coaches, Skates Off The Ice Forever [UPDATE]
Tuesday was Senior Night at Farmington (Minn.) High School, and senior goaltender Austin Krause was among those honored. But Krause wasn't particularly in the mood. He has spent this season being demoted to backup, losing playing time to a sophomore. This was just Krause's ninth start in 23 games....

Let's All Watch Marco Rubio's Panicked Drink Of Water In Extreme Slow Motion
It was the swig heard 'round the world. Florida senator Marco Rubio, tasked with delivering the official Republican response to President Obama's State of the Union address, found himself parched and distant from the necessary tool to quench that burning fire. In other words, he was thirsty. Usual...

Did Vince Young Take Out A High-Interest Loan To Pay For His Own $300,000 Birthday Party?
So that lawsuit pitting Vince Young against both his former agent and his former financial planner is going pretty much as amicably as we told you it would. Young, who's been out of the NFL since August and is back yawning his way through classes at the University of Texas, is suing Ronnie Peoples, ...

Here's Pope John Paul II Taking Some Swings At An Indoor Batting Cage
Pitchers and catchers! Popes, ranked! But how's this for synergy? The late Pope John Paul II, on a visit to California in 1987, stepping inside a batting cage to take a few hacks while a dude and a couple of pontificate minimi stand around talking softball. The Vatican's sports broadcasting divisi...

Alabama Players Arrested After They Allegedly Concussed Two Guys And Robbed Them
It's hard not to respect Nick Saban. Not because he's a good coach or anything, but because he constantly reminds us of college football's rich history. Want physics-defying running backs who wow us for two years before flopping in the pros? He's got 'em. Want linebackers simply bigger and stronger ...

Larry Bird's Son Allegedly Tried To Run Over His Ex-Girlfriend With His Car
Connor Bird, the 21-year-old son of NBA legend Larry Bird, was arrested on Sunday by the Indiana University police department after allegedly trying to hit his ex-girlfriend with his car. According to police, Bird and his ex-girlfriend got into an argument in his apartment, which ended with him thr...

<em>National Enquirer</em>: O.J. "Daddy Juice" Simpson Has Gotten Very Gay In Prison
Let's start with the opening paragraph of the National Enquirer's "WORLD EXCLUSIVE" report:...

"I'm Down For Drinks, Laughs, Sex": The Sexual Harassment Claims That Brought Down Toledo's Running Coach
It was a matter of rules and consequences, he said. On Jan. 24, Kevin Hadsell, the director of the University of Toledo's men's and women's cross country and women's track program, announced his resignation, a move that was as mysterious as it was abrupt. Hadsell had been at Toledo since 1998, and i...

2002-03 Chicago Bulls, Ranked According To Likelihood The Player Was Getting Baked Before Games
"There were guys smoking weed before games," Jay Williams recalled of his rookie year with the Bulls, his only season in the league. "Guys asking in the middle of the game, 'Do you smell popcorn?'" Which guys, exactly, Williams does not specify. So here's a list of the 2002-03 Bulls, ranked from lea...