ti Page 1580 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Michael Johnson Fell Off A Boat During An America's Cup Series Race
So we've written before about how the powers organizing the America's Cup have turned it into NASCAR at sea. (Our old pal Katie Baker wrote more about this on Friday.)...

Minor Leaguer Plays All Nine Positions In Nine-Inning Game
After he played every position in the field in a single game over the weekend, you could say Indians farmhand Justin Toole is a nine-toole player, but only if you want to get punched in the kidney....

Jayson Werth's Glove Is Just For Show
Did you know baseball players didn't regularly wear gloves until the 1890s? Jayson Werth is an absolute throwback, barehanding a pop fly in yesterday's game just because. Or at least because he lost it in the sun....

Behind Home Plate At The Little League World Series, An Ump With The Broken-est Finger Ever
"Let's see, my finger bends sideways at the knuckle, so I'll just keep it out of sight and away from kids, who hate that sort of thing. Or, actually—I'll just do the exact opposite."...

A Chick-Fil-A Employee's Silent Protest: The Week In Unintentional Dongs
This week's dong roundup is dedicated to Colin, because he sent us the crescent roll dong and, indeed, proved that he sent us the crescent roll dong through a series of trials so grueling and intricate they bordered on perverse. Also, a person named Isaac claimed the ice tray dong, which I should h...

Adam LaRoche Hit A Ball About As Far As Possible Without Hitting A Home Run
Bad break for the Nationals on this one. Adam LaRoche took Cliff Lee deep over the wall at Citizens Bank Park. Unfortunately, it hit flush with a small fence on top of the wall, bounced straight up and back onto the field. Jayson Werth thought it was a home run. Adam LaRoche thought it was a home ru...


Your Roger Clemens Frosted Tips Update
They are frosty. Very, very frosty. Also frosty for Clemens? The radar gun. The rocket got up to 88 miles per hour during his 3 1/3 innings. I should say, 3 1/3 shutout innings. He struck out two and allowed just one hit. Stay hot, 22! [NY Daily News]...
![It Sure Looks Like Adrian Gonzalez Will Be Hitting Cleanup For The Dodgers Today [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17x3b17hcsjb1jpg.jpg)
It Sure Looks Like Adrian Gonzalez Will Be Hitting Cleanup For The Dodgers Today [UPDATE]
There's still no official word from the teams, but the Dodgers sure seem to think that Adrian Gonzalez will be moving to Los Angeles. He's batting cleanup and playing first base according to the lineup posted by Enrique Rojas of ESPN Deportes. Buster Olney also tweeted that Gonzalez would be in the ...

The Mets Spent An Hour Listening To Various Versions Of The Oasis Classic "Wonderwall"
I've always wanted to be in a major league clubhouse before a game, just to see what goes on. I imagine a lot of messing around, playing video games and guys hiding from Pedro Gomez. And blasting music, of course....

Skunk Terrorizes Football Game
If you are blind and listening to this, you might think it's that scene from a disaster movie where the woman hangs perilously by a finger, hundreds of feet above a crowded city street. But really, it's just a skunk running through a high school football game in Mississippi and setting up shop und...

Rockets GM Daryl Morey Has A Counterintuitive And Analytic Reason For Giving Money To Mitt Romney
Mitt Romney is not a really popular guy, except in the Cayman Islands. Lots of people like him because he's not Barack Obama, and lots of people like him because his party's platform aligns with their personal views, but no one really seems to like Mitt for his essential Mittness. But Daryl Morey, t...

Fab Melo Is Huge And Brazilian And Crushed A Folding Chair
Melo was in New York this week with the rest of the 2012 class for a rookie photo shoot. Then this happened, and it was good....

Shia LaBeouf Wants You To Take Him Seriously
Being successful sure is nice, but what everybody really wants is to be taken seriously. Whether it's Woody Allen following up Annie Hall with the dour Interiors, George Michael turning away from the pop stardom of Faith for the confessional Listen Without Prejudice Vol. 1, or Robin Williams decidin...

Miguel Cairo Fails To Make The Easiest Play Ever
After Juan Pierre led off the Phillies' half of the ninth with a single, it was pretty obvious Kevin Frandsen was going to try to bunt him over to second to put the winning run in scoring position. And once Frandsen got the bunt down and the ball rolled toward Miguel Cairo, it was pretty obvious Cai...

Going To A Ravens Game Might Give You Rabies, Apparently
Bats! At the Ravens game! So says NBC Washington:...

Does A Last-Place Team Really Need Beat Reporters?
The Mariners fly to Chicago today, 12 games back in their division, and five teams ahead of them in the wild card hunt. Despite a healthy winning streak, these last few weeks will likely be an exercise in playing out the string. But the Ms, and their fans, are bringing their hopes with them. Not tag...

Here Is Former Penn State President Graham Spanier's Response To The Freeh Report
As we told you yesterday, former Penn State president Graham Spanier launched a media offensive that began with a press conference during which his lawyers excoriated the Freeh report and its findings. Later, the New Yorker published a Q&A with Spanier, and Josh Elliot did an interview with Spanier ...

NBC Cut A Memorial Tribute To A Dead U.S. Marine From Its Opening Ceremony Telecast. Here's His Story.
Three weeks ago we brought you the story of U.S. Air Force Academy cadet Andrew Chin. Chin's friends and family submitted his photo to be included in a memorial segment of the London Olympics opening ceremony, only for them to realize when the program aired on NBC in tape delay that the memorial se...