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Dan Snyder Makes Grandmothers Cry, And That's Just The Beginning Of It
Dave McKenna of the Washington City Paper has compiled an A-Z guide of all the things that make Redskins owner Dan Snyder awful. U is for "Unobstructed View: What Snyder wanted of the Potomac River from the back of his Montgomery County home."...

Fighter Wins Jiu-Jitsu Tournament Wearing Greenman Suit
Luke Summerfield obviously didn't think grappling was hard enough. He decided to wear a Greenman—or Redman—suit during a recent tournament in which he blindly grappled his way to first place. Surely an inspiration to spandex-body-suit wearers the world over....

Eva Longoria Divorces Tony Parker Over Affair With Brent Barry's Wife, Reports Guy From <em>Saved By The Bell</em> And Other Journalists
So Longoria split from Tony Parker, and there are rumors of a fling with a teammate's wife. We're confident running with this, because it's being reported by some of the top names in sports media....

A Video Gallery Of Terrible Team Songs, Featuring Zubaz Pants, "Let's Get Metsmerized," And Much More
Previously, we looked at bad '80s team songs. They were bad, but our morbid curiosity was not fulfilled. We asked you to send us more. You did not disappoint. Here are more awful '80s team songs....

Cranky Old Man Chides Everyone For Enjoying YouTube Clip
Frank Deford on that whimsical middle school trick play: "It wasn't genius at all; rather, it was a form of child abuse."...

How To Identify Satanic Sacrifice: A Helpful, Creepy Police Training Video
This old police training video teaches up-and-coming detectives how to look for signs that their murder victim has been sacrificed to Satan. One such clue: often "a penis is placed inside the mouth of the deceased person." Good to know. [Metal Insider]...

Remember, Michael Vick Was On <em>Pros Vs. Joes</em> Just Eight Months Ago
Last March, Mike Vick's option was picked up by the Philadelphia Eagles. Since the Birds still had Donovan McNabb and Kevin Kolb on the roster, the move was a puzzling one that appeared to be less a real commitment to a backup Wildcat specialist than a nice gesture by an organization seeking a littl...

Adam Dunn Close To Accepting Birthright As DH
Adam Dunn's about to hit a lot of doubles. The Rays might be hoarding Uptons. Ladies and gentlemen, please stand back, because this is one HOTFUCKINGSTOVE....

Thunderous Dunk Uses Opponent's Chest As A Springboard
Best we can tell, this is from the third level of the German pro basketball system, and that's University of Dayton grad Marcus Johnson going all Tom Chambers on some poor schmo. All 35 fans were thrilled....

Chris Bosh Unlikely To Enjoy Chris Bosh's New Theme Song
Are you struggling to find a phrase to describe a product you bought that was supposed to be really good, but thus far is just disappointing? Maybe it was falsely advertised as top-of-the-line? It's "like a Bosh." [The Basketball Jones]...

Greg Oden's Shirt Is Far More Accurate Than He Realizes
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Who Wants To Watch A Bunch Of Trick Plays?
Complex has a gallery of the top 50 trick plays in football history, or at least in that part of football history currently available on YouTube. There are some familiar ones, and there are others, like this one, you may have missed....

When Is An 80-Point Fantasy Football Lead Unsafe? When Your Opponent Has Michael Vick
Reading other people's Fantasy Football stories are usually boring, but poor reader Scott S's running diary of his nut-punching loss thanks to last night's touchdown parade by The Best Football Player In The Universe Ever is quite enjoyable. Enjoy the misery....

Melee Breaks Out In MMA Ring, Ref Gets Knocked Out
Grachan 5 was like a lot of MMA events in the way that I suspect this sort of thing happens at every MMA event. Watch as Takeo Shiina introduces Jung Hyun Lee and an unsuspecting referee to his vengeance....

You Tell Us: Who Are The Worst Players In NFL History?
Now that you've read Jeff Pearlman's two-parter on the NFL's worst players, head on over to #theworstever and share your own thoughts, lists, Rashaan Salaam memories, etc....

How To Make Your Own Four Loko
The FDA is going to ban caffeinated malt liquor beverages very soon. Gone will be Joose and gone will be our precious, disgusting Four Loko. Luckily, you will be prepared for the 21st century prohibition with this helpful video....

Tony Parker's And Eva Longoria's Bland Fairytale Comes To An End
Parker filed for divorce yesterday from his wife of three years. Spurs games just became less interesting, if that's possible. [TMZ]...

The Bottom 100: The Worst Players In NFL History (Part 2)
You’ve seen Part 1. Read on for the rest of the worst. Share your own list at #theworstever....

For Sale: The Laptop Cam Newton Stole
According to an emailer named "A Person With Connections" the laptop that Auburn's quarterback whipping boy Cam Newton stole from that poor kid in Florida has been recovered and is now for sale on the Scuzz Money Market. Here's his pitch....

The Poop Mugshot Will Make You Happy
Nice to be back. Your letters:...