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A Bonus Hater’s Guide To The Williams-Sonoma Catalog
Hello again. Earlier this week we all gathered round the wassail to roast the goofiest items in this year’s Williams-Sonoma catalog. HOWEVER, it was a really thick catalog this year, and there simply wasn’t enough room in print for EVERY ridiculous item featured. Especially the champagne saber. So, ...
White Sox Acquire Cash Considerations
The hot stove is burning to the touch, and the Chicago White Sox are, as usual, stoking the flames. In today’s Rule 5 draft, they used the fourth overall pick on Carlos Tocci, a frail-looking outfielder in the Philadelphia Phillies’ system who’s hit .266/.317/.377 in his minor-league career. Somewha...
How Nicole Bass Was Slut-Shamed By WWE During Her Sexual Harassment Lawsuit
On Friday, former WWE, WCW, and Impact wrestling writer Vince Russo, pro wrestling’s favorite pariah, relayed a story on his podcast that piqued a lot of interest. “I never talk about this, because this is a touchy one, I can tell you one of the female wrestlers came up to me [and] told me that she ...
The Canucks Let The Predators Put On A Show
Sure, in any seven-goal game you’re going to see some fluke goals. Like P.K. Subban half-whiffing on a giveaway one-timer and the goalie never seeing the knuckling shot; or Subban scoring from center ice; or Filip Forsberg banging in a centering pass off a Canuck’s skate....
Hot Damn, P.K. Subban Scored From A Million Miles Away
P.K. Subban put the Predators up 3-0 in the second period of tonight’s game against the Canucks, getting his second goal of the evening by scoring from a point that just logically seems like it should be near impossible to manage. (From center ice, if you want to get all technical about it)....
Giannis Had Two Dope Slams And Would've Had A Third If Not For John Henson<em></em><em></em>
Giannis Antetokounmpo produced some top-tier highlight clips despite a 115-108 loss to the Pelicans. Early in the night, he contorted himself on a drive and used his long arms to flush it....
Joe Smith, Baseball's One True Joe Smith, To Sign With Astros
Much is made of the fact that baseball’s history makes the sport so rich in numbers—a statistic to back up every story and an analysis to run for every situation, as broadcasters and newspaper columnists and front office nerds alike will all remind you—but that baseball’s history makes the sport so ...
Louisville Countersues Rick Pitino, Seeks Money Lost From NCAA Violations
The clusterfuck of Rick Pitino getting fired by Louisville amid an FBI corruption investigation is only getting more complicated. While Pitino has active suits open against his former school for wrongful termination and Adidas for intentional infliction of emotional distress, Louisville has now coun...
NFL Network Exec Deletes Dozens Of Twitter Interactions With Escorts And Porn Stars, Then Entire Account
David Eaton is the vice president and executive editor for NFL Media, which comprises the NFL website and television channel. (According to a 2011 story about his hiring as a new editor, the ABC News veteran was brought in to run the “NFL Media Super Newsroom.”) He appears to have spent much of yes...
Warren Sapp Defends Himself Against Sexual Harassment Allegations By Posting Photo Of Vibrator<em></em>
Warren Sapp was among the NFL Network employees accused of sexual harassment in Jami Cantor’s wrongful termination lawsuit against NFL Network. The Hall of Famer (who was fired by the network in 2015 after a solicitation arrest) made Cantor watch him urinate and gave her sex toys as presents, accord...
Tom Thibodeau Is Destruction
In his stints as an associate head coach in Boston and head coach in Chicago, Tom Thibodeau made his name and his career with a set of genuinely smart and hugely influential defensive tactics, leveraging the NBA’s relaxed rules against zone defense to essentially eliminate what had been the dominant...
Report: Marlins Continue Setting Themselves On Fire, Trade Marcell Ozuna To Cardinals
The Miami Marlins, an alleged major league club in the NL East, are carrying on with their plan to strip the franchise bare and trade off all their players worth a damn. Giancarlo Stanton is a Yankee, Dee Gordon is a Mariner, everyone else is available, and now Marcell Ozuna is a Cardinal. Jesse San...
Amazing Online Hoax <em></em>Welcomes "Washington RedHawks" To The NFL
As a general rule, when the internet’s baking outer shitlands send aspiring creators of fake news, it isn’t sending us its best. It’s sending Destroy Belly Fat With One Weird Click fraudwads, it’s sending Macedonian click-hustlers and pinwheel-eyed domestic weirdos whose minds have been corroded by...
Chris Froome Fails Doping Test
Three-time defending Tour de France champion Chris Froome failed a doping test at the Vuelta a España this September and is facing a potential year-long suspension from cycling, as the Guardian first reported today. Froome, the most dominant cyclist of the past decade and the winner of four Tours an...
We Asked Bostonians What They Know About Hurling
I went to Boston for a hurling tournament with plans to poke fun at the city’s heavy-handed claim to Irish heritage. Real Irishmen—tall ones, who are good at sports—would show up at the municipal manifestation of a St. Patrick’s Day parade and surely put to shame some drunken Massholes. ...
And Now For Some Stupidly Bad Defense From Karl-Anthony Towns
Joel Embiid is talented and charming and big, a combination of qualities which can reasonably be quite daunting in anyone, but especially so in a basketball player. Karl-Anthony Towns’s strategy for handling all that during the second quarter tonight was just to panic-jump, arms outstretched, at a r...
Oscar Pistorius Hurt In Prison Fight Over Telephone Use
Olympic runner and convicted murderer Oscar Pistorius was hurt in a fight with another inmate that began over the use of a public telephone, a South African prison official has confirmed to the Associated Press....
Danny Williams: Bruce Arena Let His Affinity For MLS Ruin World Cup Qualification
Barring any individual or group ticket purchases, the United States soccer team will not be attending next summer’s World Cup. The general consensus places a good deal of the blame for on the nightmarishly incompetent coaching job done by MLS lifer Bruce Arena. Due to his conservatism, passionate d...
Mike Tomlin Mangles Metaphor
Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin is plenty fired up to play the Patriots on Sunday, and he’s not afraid to say so. From ESPN:...
Tom Brady's New App Will Give You Terrible Wellness Advice For $199.99 A Year
Tom Brady, in his quest to become the NFL’s answer to Gwyneth Paltrow, has just launched the TB12 Method mobile app. The TB12 Method is the dubious lifestyle brand that Brady cooked up with Alex Guerrero, a truly dangerous and dishonest quack who is Brady’s personal trainer. For the low cost of $19....