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Brought To You By The Network That Televises The Little League World Series
It's Aug. 24, the day we were too busy to run for mayor of Wasilla. Click the photo to enlarge. If that doesn't work, click here. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors. ...
Please Send Us Your Fantasy Football Correspondence With The Biggest Dickheads In Your League
Some of you may be familiar with our "Life Lessons" series, featuring rec-league amateur athletes who take their weekly kickball/softball/frisbee golf games waaay too seriously and, in turn, suck all the joy out of these activities for their teammates. These submissions were phenomenal, but I have a...
Farting At Urinals: An Exploration In Etiquette
The Postmortal drops a week from today, and to celebrate the release, next week's edition of the Deadspin Funbag will be a LIVE FUNBAG. We'll throw the post up around noon, then you can send in questions for the next three hours (via email or the comments) and I'll answer them in real time. All you ...
Pat Summitt Diagnosed With Dementia, Will Still Coach This Season (Updated With Summitt's Taped Statement)
Sad news out of Knoxville: CBS's Gregg Doyel reports that Pat Summitt—head coach of Tennessee's women's basketball team and the most successful coach in NCAA history—has been diagnosed with dementia. She's just 59 years old. ...
Zach Randolph Isn't In Trouble, He Just Hosted The Mansion Party Where Everyone Beat Up The Pot Dealer With Pool Cues
Remember how Z-Bo had a great year, and Memphis decided to lock him up for four years and $71 million, and everyone yelled You fools! It was a contract year! He's going to suck again for the next three years now! and Memphis didn't listen and did it anyway?...
Kool Aid Man Really Wanted To Catch That Foul Ball
Your morning roundup for Aug. 23, the day they found a lot of semen in a fancy hotel room. H/T to bigsombrero for the photo. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
This Evening: What NFL Team Should You Root For? Here's A Flowchart
Your p.m. roundup for Aug. 22, the day we learned the Internet (read: humanity) totally sucked. Chart by Paul Caputo and Shea Lewis for Interpretation By Design (click chart to enlarge, or click here if that doesn't work). Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
This Gaddafi's Soccer Career Is Probably Over
It's being reported this morning that opposition forces have captured Al-Saadi Gaddafi, the third son of the soon-to-be outgoing dictator. It's a great day for the people of Libya, but a sad day for Serie A. A conviction at the International Criminal Court would likely prevent Saadi from adding to h...
ESPN's Ian O'Connor Confuses His Job Duties With Eli Manning's
Did you hear what Plaxico Burress did at the Meadowlands last night? He did nothing. The ESPN.com caption this morning was "Plaxico Burress shines in his first game back in the NFL, scoring a touchdown against the Bengals on Sunday." This is a stupid lie, born of boredom and fraud: Burress's first g...
Who's Got 41? Great. But Who's Got 41?
Your morning roundup for Aug. 22, the day we asked taxpayers to foot the bill for a shopping mall. Photo via @EricStangel. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors. ...
Gird Your Loins, Green Bay: Some Dude Is Running Around Town Pretending To Be Brett Favre
We hear completely retired NFL quarterback Brett Favre is pretty revered up in Wisconsin. Especially in the town of Green Bay. Midwesterners are forgiving folks, and they put up with the whole dong-texting and playing-for-the-Vikings thing. So, as you might expect, some dude (pictured above) pretend...
Pennsylvania Catcher's Unzipped Fly Reminds Us That, Yes, These Are 12-Year-Olds Playing Baseball On ESPN
Your morning roundup for August 21, the day you poor suckers got all the RC Cola you wanted. Photo via tipster Connor....
In Retrospect, It's More Of A Shock That Tom Brady Wasn't An Uggs Spokesmodel Sooner
The Names Blog, brought to you by the Boston Globe, presents this image under the headline, "Brady looks rather manly in his new Ugg boots." Doesn't he though? ...
Charles Mann Will Have You Know That He's Totally Straight
On the sidelines with a mic for last night's Washington/Indianapolis game, former Redskin Charles Mann complimented the heck out of safety LaRon Landry as O.J. Atogwe took it all in. Talking about how he looked fantastic. But wait, wait, not like that. He's happily married. To a woman. Totally str...
Cockblocked At Catholic School!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
A Not-Entirely-Constructive Exchange With Yahoo's NCAA Scandal Hunter, Charles Robinson
A few months ago, I had an angry but illuminating exchange on Facebook with Charles Robinson, author of Tuesday's big Yahoo hoo-hah about the Miami Hurricanes. The topic then was Jim Tressel, but it might as well have been Miami or Reggie Bush or any of the many subjects of big Yahoo hoo-hahs over t...
The Blue Jays' Sign-Stealing Operation Is A Lot Less Sophisticated On The Road
Your morning roundup for Aug. 19, the day we went fishing and caught a scuba diver instead. H/T to Jamo for the photo, which he got from a friend at the Jays-A's game who texted him to say: "Guy looks into binoculars for five seconds then holds up sign that says either 'OFF SPEED' or 'FAST BALL.' S...
The 2011 Hater's Guide To The Top 25
It’s that time of year again. Time to bust out the old roasting pan and say despicable, awful, horrible things about every team in the college football Top 25. Join me, won’t you? Please note: The following guide contains words, which may be an issue for those of you who attend Auburn. As a safety p...
Diddy Goes To School With Russell Westbrook And Baron Davis
Your morning roundup for Aug. 18, the day the kids and the dog prevented a dude from stealing our van. Photo via @kevinlove. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
<em>GQ</em>'s Michael Vick Story Will Just Make White People Angry Again
This one, penned by Yahoo! movie blogger Will Leitch, drops tomorrow at 7 a.m. so the mag has started to send out embargoed teases to other media outlets to get the buzziest buzz going on this thing but, shit, why wait 12 hours for the good stuff? You'll read it all tomorrow on GQ's website, right? ...