uri Page 156 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Today In Really Awful Bicycle Injuries
"Because of the friction of the pants with the saddle, I suffer from an injury to the scrotum. The extreme heat and excessive sweating caused a heavy irritation in that area. There is a hole. It is not the first time that I have suffered in this place, but never as bad as now." [Cycling News]...
SF Giants Payroll Manager Caught Embezzling After She Gave Herself A $300k World Series Bonus Despite Her $80k Salary
File this one under stupid (alleged) criminals who are also world champions: The KGO-TV I-Team has more....
Javaris Crittenton Will Turn Himself In Tonight
Put down your pitchforks, Atlantans. Javaris Crittenton, the former Georgia Tech/Lakers/Grizzlies/Wizards guard, will surrender to Atlanta police, after a brief disappearance and manhunt that landed him federal charges of unlawful flight to avoid prosecution. He's wanted in connection with an August...
Cedric Benson Will Spend His Bye Week In Jail
Last summer in Austin, Cedric Benson got into a bar fight that we'll rate 0.2 Jordan Jeffersons. He shoved some workers and threw a punch, and was arrested for misdemeanor assault. Today he paid the piper, pleading no contest and being sentenced to 20 days in jail....
Ric Flair Is Threatening To Sue Grantland Over "Falsehoods" In Their Story, Even Though The "Falsehoods" Came From Flair's Book
WOOOO, boy. TMZ reports that Ric Flair, noted pro wrestler, is weighing his legal options against Grantland, Bill Simmons' sports-prose panacea, after the site published a long piece this week by Shane Ryan on Flair's legal trouble. ...
Today In "Bizarre" Injury Ledes
Swansea defender Alan Tate has broken his leg in what his club have described as a "bizarre golfing accident." Tate was a passenger in a golf buggy at a south Wales club on Sunday when the buggy "lost control," Swansea said." [Daily Mail] (H/T Tomuban)...
Brave TV Reporter Gets A Mouthful Of Sewage-Seasoned Sea Foam To Seize The Big Story
Your morning roundup for Aug. 28, the day we give a shout out to aquatic fleas. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors. (Want more Tucker Barnes? Here.)...
Soccer Hooliganism In Switzerland Features A Lot Of SWAT-Team Intimidating Violence
You'd have been forgiven if you didn't think the land that gave us Roger Federer and Toblerone white chocolate was capable of bottle-throwing, stick-swinging, flare-wielding, mace-throwing, cop-scaring hooliganism....
Didier Drogba Got Knocked Out Cold During Today's Chelsea Match
From the looks of things, Didier Drogba was unconscious before he hit the ground after getting a head shot from Norwich City's goalkeeper. He was down with an apparent head and/or neck injury for a while, to the point that there were 11 extra minutes in the second half of Chelsea's 3-1 victory....
Johan Santana Wants To Seal The Testimony In His Ongoing Sexual Assault Lawsuit
New York Mets pitcher Johan Santana—forgive us if you didn't need that detail, but Santana hasn't pitched since the middle of last season—was accused last year of sexual assault on a golf course in October 2009. The woman said Santana approached her and raped her, as she was pleading with him to sto...
Today In Utterly Predictable Ledes
Former New York Mets star Lenny Dykstra was charged on Thursday with exposing himself to a string of women who answered his Craigslist employment ads, Los Angeles city prosecutors said on Thursday. [Reuters]...
If You Have To Get Arrested, Driving While Drinking A Beer And Receiving Oral Sex Isn't A Bad Way To Go
Thanks to The Smoking Gun, we can all meet George Howard, a Kentucky man arrested this morning for some shenanigans involving a 2006 Ford on the outskirts of Louisville. Johnny Law intervened after seeing Howard's ride allegedly collide with a curb....
There Will Be Justice, But LSU Has To Play Oregon First
"As of Sunday night, though, the players had decided to delay a scheduled interview with police and had not been asked to turn themselves in. I don't have any inside information, but this being law and order in Louisiana, I predict a big break in the case to come sometime on the morning of Sept. 4....
Three-Time Kentucky Derby Winner Calvin Borel Busted For DWI In Indiana
The squeaky-voiced superhero hath fallen. Calvin Borel, the maybe-toothless jockey aboard 2007's Street Sense, 2009's Mine that Bird, and 2010's Super Saver, Kentucky Derby winners all, was arrested for DWI in Evansville, Indiana....
Rafael Furcal Is Super-Uncoordinated
Via Buster Olney: "Rafael Furcal sprained his thumb when bracing a fall, after tripping over a rope near the batting cage here in Wrigley." If he's this clumsy while sober, we'd hate to see him drunk....
Here's Video Of Bryce Harper Getting Helped Off The Field After Hurting His Hamstring Tonight
Washington Nationals prospect/messiah Bryce Harper of the Harrisburg Senators came up lame after trying to advance from first to third in the 8th inning against the Akron Aeros. He couldn't seem to put much weight on his right leg as he got helped off the field....
Jim McMahon, Six Former Players Cite NFL "Negligence And Intentional Misconduct" In Brain Injury Related Lawsuit
In what's the first potential class-action lawsuit of its kind, seven former NFL players filed suit against the league today accusing it of "negligence and intentional misconduct in its response to the headaches, dizziness and dementia that former players have reported."...
Roger Clemens Handed Out Some Souvenirs At His Trial
It's been a month since a mistrial was declared in Roger Clemens' perjury case, and yet the misconduct just won't end. A group of court security guards are under investigation for accepting signed baseballs from Clemens, which is not a thing that is ok....
Youth-Baseball Umpire In Missouri Claims Pitcher, Catcher Conspired To Hit Him With A Pitch
In the fifth-inning of a big 18-and-under Mac-N-Seitz Midwest Championships and Showcase baseball game, home plate umpire Kyle Reynolds detected shenanigans were afoot. They were the sort of shenanigans in which a catcher allegedly jumps out of the way of a pitch so it strikes the umpire behind hi...
Cubs Consider Getting Rid Of Wrigley's Most Iconic Feature
The ivy is safe. The troughs are endangered. ...