uri Page 171 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Jahvid Best In Surprisingly Good Shape (i.e. Alive, Moving)
Someone recently wrote (I can't for the life of me remember who) that there's nothing quite like the sound of an entire stadium sure they just watched someone die....

So, You Want Some Nasty Injuries With Your Hockey? I Got Your Nasty Injuries For Ya
The esteemed Wysh a/k/a Puck Daddy has a rundown of the Top 10 Most Brutal NHL Injuries of the Last Decade. Let's have a look-see, shall we? (Clint Malarchuk figurine sold separately)...

The Terrifying Horrors Of Sports-O-Ween
We've tallied the results and as suspected....your Halloween costumes kind of stunk. Don't sweat it though. At least you weren't burned alive for going to a Scottish soccer match dressed as a sheep....

Matt D'Agostini Got Knocked The Fuggout
Chicago Blackhawks Andrew Ladd absolutely leveled Montreal Canadiens right winger Matt D'Agostini early in last night's 3-2 Chicago victory. More talk about head shots! Whee!...

Congress Gets Involved In Concussion Debate, Fails To Solve Everything
Goodell, along with NFLPA leader DeMaurice Smith and other people in suits, was grilled by the House Judiciary Committee about all this stuff they've been hearing about "concussions" and "permanent brain damage." The Commish talked a great deal about all the many things the league is doing—rule chan...

NFL Dementia Study Is Not Exactly "Scientific"
The NFL would like everyone to just calm down about all the brain-melting that they help create every Sunday, at least until they can finish their own personal scientific study that will be totally fair and not at all biased....

UFC 104: Urine For A Good Fight
In advance of tomorrow's UFC 104, let us pause for a moment to consider the merits of drinking your own piss....

Apparently, Paul Brown Stadium Is Also A Very Large Public Urinal
Here's a fun fact: Texans' right guard Chris White pissed his pants against the Bengals on Sunday because he was "uncomfortable," but didn't want to come off the field. Don't worry. Jeff Reed's got his back. [Chronicle; Photo]...

The Joys Of Very Large Old Public Urinals
Time for your Deadspin Open Mailbag Tuesday. Email us here or submit your questions via Twitter. This week, we're covering old urinals, candy, baby wipes, and more....

Jeff Reed: Defender Of Public Urination
Now we know the real truth behind Jeff Reed's cop trouble last night, and I owe him an apology. Reed was merely trying to defend his teammate—tight end Matt Spaeth—from police intimidation....after Spaeth was caught peeing in public....

Lifting Weights Obsessively Helped Stafon Johnson Survive Nasty Weightlifting Accident
Dr. Gudata Hinika, trauma director at California Hospital Medical Center: "Had that been any one of us, meaning me, I would not have survived. His neck was so solid and so muscular, that actually helped maintain his airway." [LAT]...

USC Running Back In Horrific-Sounding Weight-Room Accident
"ESPN's Shell[e]y Smith is reporting USC RB Stafon Johnson has been taken to the hospital after a bar came down on his throat in the weight room. Johnson was coughing up blood." [CBS2]...

Welcome To The Chad Henne Era, Miami Fans
Chris Mortensen says: Chad Pennington has a torn shoulder something and is probably done for the year. (He'll get a second opinion, but James Andrews has already cut him open twice.) That's why Jimmy Buffett invented the Wildcat, right? [ESPN/SecondStringFullback]...

Missouri Manages To Screw Up Throwing Out Cell Phones
When your school is trying to raise money, sell cookies or something. Don't sell your coaches' old mobile phones. And if you must, make sure the address books and text messages have been erased. I'm looking at you, Mizzou....

Does The World Need Cheerleaders?
The answer, of course, is "Yes." But why should that be so? Do we really need leaders to organize our cheers? Do basket tosses contribute to victory? Or is it that you can see ladies' underwear without being consider pervy?...

Sports Doctors Demand More BRAINS!!!
Three active NFL players have agreed to donate their brains to science. What?! That's just nuts! What kind of crazy doct ... oh ... after they die. Yeah, that makes more sense. [AP]...

Brian Urlacher's Season Is Over
The Bears linebacker dislocated his wrist last night and is reportedly out for the rest of this season. Chicago's opening week just gets better and better! [Tribune]...

Great Idea For A Paper Looking To Curry Favor: Hire Coach's Daughter
Not news: The Hartford Courant is planning to hire a new blogger to cover UConn women's hoops. News: said blogger's name is Alysa Auriemma. Conflict of interest much?...

Injured Sports Editor's Paper Has Little Sympathy
That a newspaper editor was severely injured on the sidelines of a high school football game is no laughing matter. The newspaper's priorities, in the wake of his hospitalization, are....

Rough Hit Destroys Belgian Soccer Player's Lower Leg
Speaking of horrible below-the-knee shots, our squeamish readers should avert their eyes from Axel Witsel's challenge on Marcin Wasilewski. And by "challenge" I mean "dividing his lower leg into two distinct pieces." Take a moment to compose yourself....