uri Page 172 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Drunken Rugby Antics Taken To Exciting New Level
Wales police arrested an entire youth rugby team after they got drunk and pushed a 4,000-lb lawn roller into a sleeping female player's tent. Well, that's a new one. Those yobs sure are creative. [Daily Mail/Bob'sBlitz]...

This Is Why NFL Players Die Young
There was a very telling sequence in last night's excellent episode of Hard Knocks that perfectly illustrates the culture of "toughness" that ultimately dooms so many football players to retirements filled with crippling, life-altering pain....

Does Fantasy Football Insurance Signal The End Of Days?
Fantasy sports have crept their way into every aspect of our sporting lives, but we have finally crossed the line from mania into madness. When you can buy injury insurance for your fantasy football players, we're through the looking glass....

Southeast Missouri State Feels The NCAA's Sting
The NCAA has thrown the book at Southeast Missouri State basketball, vacating all their men's basketball wins from 2006-2008 because an assistant gave impermissible benefits to a player—by giving him a lift home to see his newborn baby....

Appalachian State QB Sidelined By Lawn Mowing Injury
Armanti Edwards, who is 32-5 as App State's starting quarterback, ran over his own foot while mowing the lawn. He'll be out 2-4 weeks. That's why you should only let racist National League baseball fans do your yard work. [TheState]...

Choose Your Own "Mets Disaster" Headline
Luis Castillo sprained his ankle last night falling down the dugout steps. Oh, and Albert Pujols hit a grand slam in the 10th to beat the Metropolitans. Their misery knows no bounds. [NY Post]...

NHL Exec Shoots And Misses With Fox News Ice Queen
When a Florida Panthers executive went on Fox News to talk about unemployment, he did what we'd all like to do, if we had no sense of decorum or shame: he macked on their anchor like nobody's business....

Jay Mariotti On Erin Andrews, AutoSummarized
"Why was the Internet ... giving semi-lives to people with no lives?" thunders Mariotti, who writes for the Internet. The column goes on in this vein for 1,500 words. Let's send this through Microsoft Word's AutoSummarize function, shall we?...

Small Child No Good At Sports, Cries; By The Way, He's In The Pros
Mauricio Baldivieso turns 13 tomorrow. As an early birthday present, his coach got him into the game for a first-division Bolivian soccer side. Did we mention the coach is his father?...

Okay, Perhaps Kellen Winslow Is A Soldier
We've all mocked Kellen Winslow in the past for grossly overestimating his own bravery. But perhaps it's time to reconsider, given that last year, he had his testicles sliced open....

College Athletes Without Insurance Should Try Not To Get Hurt
Being an NCAA athlete is awesome and everything, but if you twist your ankle—or something much worse—there's a good chance your school's health insurance won't cover you. Now put some tape on that and get back in there!...

Wait, Maybe Running With Bulls Isn't Such A Great Idea?
A 27-year-old Spaniard (not pictured) was gored to death, when a 1,130-pound bull (that's him there) broke loose from the Pamplona pack and went understandably crazy. It's the first goring death at the famous bull run in 14 years....

David Cone Will Choose Our Supreme Court
Sonia Sotomayor will go before the U.S. Senate next week to face the gauntlet that is a Supreme Court confirmation hearing. Thankfully, she will have one very powerful ally on her side—noted judicial scholar David B. Cone....

Young Cubs Fan Mocks Ryan Dempster's Pain
This young fan in blue has thoroughly enjoyed Ryan Dempster's comical fall over a dugout railing, not realizing that the pitcher has just fractured his big toe and will spend a month on the DL. Go Cubbies!...

A Starburst Is Born
To one Tampa Bay Rays fan, these stars are not similar. To a Florida prosecutor, the blue star is a shameless rip of the yellow star. Which might put the fan in the clink for a year....

Yankees Will Deign To Respect Our Civil Liberties
Bradford Campeau-Laurion — the guy who was drummed out of Yankee Stadium for trying to tinkle during the Yankees' seventh-inning tribute to compelled patriotism, the playing of "God Bless America" — has settled his lawsuit against the team and city....

What Is Wrong With Our Fragile Baseball Players? (MRI Edition)
As anyone who plays fantasy baseball can tell you, injuries are killing your team. Baseball players spend more time on the DL than ever before, which probably says something about the times we live in. (It means you're weak.)...

New, Fancy-Talking NFLPA Boss Knows His Shakespeare, Young Jeezy
DeMaurice Smith, the rookie executive director of what's left of the NFLPA, is dropping some serious oratory on his constituents these days, name-checking Hamlet, Nicolas Sarkozy, Napoleon, Iran and Young Jeezy, all in one speech. He's the realest!...

Cheerleading Isn't A Sport. It's A War
"Between 1982 and 2007, there were 103 fatal, disabling or serious injuries recorded among female high school athletes, with the vast majority (67) occurring in cheerleading." Regular old gymnastics had "only" nine. Yikes. [Live Science, via Bob]...