uri Page 51 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Chelsea's Grouchy Meltdown Is Happening Ahead Of Schedule
Why is it always like this at Chelsea?...

This Buzzer-Beater Was Just Pure Chaos
There is nothing quite like the crisp, balletic artistry of a cleverly drawn-up and immaculately executed play. And yet, this is way better:...

Hockey Man Loses Multiple Teeth After High-Stick Smacks Him In The Face
Now in his 12th season, James Neal has seen his fair share of action on the ice and that experience likely gives him an edge over the younger players who don’t have the same mileage as him. But not even a veteran like him is immune to the occasional accidental hit that can knock a player’s teeth out...

Jamaican Distance Runner Kemoy Campbell Collapses While Pacing Men's 3000m At Millrose Games
Saturday afternoon’s Millrose Games had to be temporarily put on hold when Jamaican distance runner Kemoy Campbell collapsed while performing his rabbiting, or pacing, duties during the men’s 3000-meter race. ...

John Wall Imperils Several Perfectly Fine Ligaments Threatening JuJu Smith-Schuster Over Injury Joke
Steelers wide receiver JuJu Smith-Schuster gave some very mild business to John Wall over the particulars of his latest injury, which involved Wall rupturing his Achilles tendon while walking around his own home. Wall is no doubt in a sensitive state of mind at the moment, and he was not amused:...

Report: Less Bamba
Mo Bamba, who went sixth in the 2018 NBA draft, was having a perfectly cromulent rookie season for the Magic: 6.2 points, 5.0 boards, and 1.4 blocks in 16 minutes a game. It was easy to forget about the big man given all the exciting tots from that lottery, and it was easy to lose sight of him amid ...

Tearful Neymar Asks An Indifferent God For Better Bones
After breaking the fifth metatarsal in his right foot for the second consecutive year, Neymar would be well within his rights to retreat into the rich person’s equivalent of a dark bedroom with the curtains drawn—so, I don’t know, Dubai?...

John Wall Slipped On His Infected Heel That Had Bone Spurs And His Achilles Tendon Exploded And His Supermax Begins Next Year<em></em>
Here is perhaps the grimmest news item of the NBA season, relayed by the Washington Wizards under the devastatingly deadpan headline, “John Wall Injury Update.”...

Canucks' Alexander Edler Taken Off On Stretcher After Gory Faceplant
Canucks defenseman Alexander Edler got tangled up while retreating in front of his team’s goal early in the third period of Monday night’s game against the Flyers, and faceplanted with extreme violence. A player spiking his face into the ice isn’t generally one of the many things a viewer expects to...

José Mourinho Eats Shit At Russian Hockey Game
Unemployed soccer manager José Mourinho is currently in Russia for some reason, and decided to take in a KHL game today. While performing the pre-game ceremonial puck drop, Mourinho managed to do in his first appearance on ice what it usually takes him three seasons to do when coaching a soccer team...

Patriots' Patrick Chung Exits Super Bowl In Air Cast After Going Down With Arm Injury
Patriots safety Patrick Chung was taken out of the Super Bowl on his own power after suffering an arm injury during a tackle attempt in the third quarter of the game....

Andy Murray Regrets That You Saw Through His Dick
The Andy-Murray-shared-a-post-surgery-x-ray-of-his-hip-in-which-the-outline-of-his-dong-is-clearly-visible story is somehow entering its third day, and Murray, for one, is over it....

Tottenham Are A Fairy Tale In Search Of A Happy Ending
When will Spurs quit messing around and finally win something? That is the question flying around North London like an arrow aimed at Mauricio Pochettino and Tottenham’s upper-management this week after the club fell out of both domestic cup competitions, succumbing to the injury crisis even the mos...

Once Again, Neymar Might Be Fucked
For Neymar, the events of the past week must feel like an especially haunting instance of déjà vu. Once again, the Paris Saint-Germain superstar came up lame in the middle of a match after a not especially horrific clash. Once again, further tests revealed the injury to be worse than it first seemed...

Andy Murray Shares Status Updates On His Hip, Dong<em></em>
Andy Murray announced today that he is recovering from a hip resurfacing, which will hopefully relieve the chronic hip pain that is forcing him into a sad, untimely retirement. The surgery involves shaving down the end of the femur and coating it in cobalt chromium metal so that it can move smoothl...

Report: Washington Will Be "Pleasantly Surprised" If Alex Smith Is Ready To Play Next Season
Washington is going into its offseason preparations with the expectation that starting quarterback Alex Smith will not be available to play next year, according to NFL Network’s Ian Rapoport....

Some Peon Tries To Hurt Neymar, Gets Humiliated By Neymar
About an hour into Paris Saint-Germain’s Coupe de France match against Strasbourg yesterday, Neymar was clowning on his inferiors with his imperial dribbling skills, as is his wont. Strasbourg midfielder Moataz Zemzemi must’ve taken Neymar’s casual demonstration of superiority personally, because he...

Victor Oladipo Exits On Stretcher After Going Down With Non-Contact Knee Injury (UPDATES)
Victor Oladipo, the leading scorer on what’s been a really impressive Indiana Pacers team so far this year, had to be taken off on a stretcher in the second quarter of his game against the Raptors on Wednesday, after going down with what looked like a non-contact right knee injury....

The <i>New York Times</i> Can't Bring Itself To Hold The USOC Accountable
In my time as a journalist, stories about child abuse have always been the one genre that everyone, even internet commenters, agree are bad. But preventing child abuse—which costs money and takes long-term dedication of resources—who has time for that? ...

Alleged Football Leaks Hacker Seeks "Whistleblower" Protection After Arrest In Hungary
Since its inception in 2015, Football Leaks, a website that publishes documents obtained from the hacking of various powerful soccer clubs and organizations, has been the bane of European soccer. The website has helped surface scandals ranging from Cristiano Ronaldo’s rape case and Jose Mourinho’s t...