van Page 86 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
This Shit Is Fucking Sick
This guy is a college student? Named Ike Nwamu? And he goes to UNLV? And in the video below, he did this fucking sick dunk and hung off the rim for a length of time WITH his arm INSIDE the net. This is called a “windmill elbow dunk,” according to The Cauldron, and yo, it is fucking sick....
NCAA Escapes Upsetting Crucial Auntie Fan Base By Keeping Luther Vandross-Sung Theme Song
In an embarrassing lack of judgement, Turner Broadcasting announced it’d be replacing Luther Vandross’ iconic version of “One Shining Moment” as their NCAA theme song last week. But once the all important Auntie and smooth R&B contingent weighed in, TBS realized their grave mistake....
Attention Thief: MLS Coach Will Buy You New Boots If You Return The 32 You Stole
A shocking crime from great and peaceful nation of Canada: Some as-of-yet unidentified thief reportedly broke into the Vancouver Whitecaps’ training facility Monday night and absconded with a bunch of the players’ boots. Most likely inspired by the surrounding culture, the team’s manager has propose...
Pitcher Who Liked The Braves More Than The Yankees Sent Back To The Yankees
The Atlanta Braves picked lefty Evan Rutckyj in the Rule 5 draft in December, taking him from the New York Yankees’ organization. The pitcher was happy for a change of scenery. Too bad for Rutckyj: The 24-year-old’s going back to the Yankees....
ESPN Broadcasters: ESPN's Reporting Is Bad
On Tuesday, ESPN’s Ramona Shelburne dropped a big piece on New York Knicks team president Phil Jackson’s handling of the season. It mainly focused on Jackson’s relationships with Knicks coaches—first Derek Fisher and now Kurt Rambis. The Knicks have looked even worse under Jackson’s longtime friend ...
Canucks Goalie Loses His Glove, Makes A Barehanded Save
Vancouver Canucks goalie Jacob Markström lost his blocker glove during Monday night’s game against Winnipeg, and still prevented Jets winger Marko Daňo from scoring a goal....
NFL Network's Heath Evans Calls For Roger Goodell To Blackball Johnny Manziel
Professional moron Heath Evans spoke on the NFL-owned NFL Network today and called on league commissioner Roger Goodell to throw out the collective bargaining agreement and ban teams from signing troubled quarterback Johnny Manziel....
Cal And Their Megatalented Freshmen Are Going To Be A Nightmare In The NCAA Tournament
This has been a particularly strong year for Pac-12 basketball. Oregon came out of sorta-nowhere and won the conference title, but below them, Utah has been excellent, as has Arizona. Colorado, Washington, and USC all should make the NCAA Tournament too, but the scariest team in the whole conference...
Everybody Get Down
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Televangelist Finally Discovers Direct Link Between Nick Saban And The Devil
We’ve long suspected a link between Crimson Tide head coach Nick Saban and the dark lord Satan—the names are just one letter away, jeez!—but here’s televangelist David Uth pointing out that the link between Alabama and sin is one inscribed in the Holy Bible....
Louis van Gaal Urges His Players To Get Rock Hard For Victory
So that’s what Louis van Gaal means when he says he pumps up Manchester United’s players before matches....
This Full-Court Chest-Pass Buzzer-Beater Is Incredible
I can’t think of another shot quite like Josh Henderson’s 70-foot buzzer-beater at the end of the first half of Vanderbilt’s 87-74 win over Florida. The low angle of the damn thing makes it nearly impossible, like an inch off in any direction would have sent it careening into the stands. It’s like a...
Evan Mathis Goes In On Chip Kelly
Will I ever get tired of former Eagles players talking shit about Chip Kelly? No, I don’t think I will....
Robin van Persie Singing R. Kelly In His Luxurious Van Is What The Good Life Looks Like
Here’s Robin van Persie, proving that the tradition of tunelessly belting out your favorite songs while riding along in cars is a phenomenon that spans the globe. What he lacks in vocal quality he more than makes up for in song choice, lyrical knowledge, and commitment to really going for it. Props....
Evander Kane Partied Too Hard At NBA All-Star Weekend, Missed Practice, Suspended One Game
It was a busy Sunday for Sabres winger Evander Kane, who scored in Buffalo’s afternoon win over Colorado, then took a private jet to Toronto for the NBA All-Star Game. It was the busy wee hours of Monday morning that might have done him in, though....
Ivan Johnson Got Banned For Life From Playing Basketball In Yet Another Country
Ivan Johnson, former Hawks power forward and one of the most intimidating NBA players in recent memory, was banned from the Phillipine Basketball Association for life this morning for, “addressing the Commissioner with profanities and showing utter disrespect for authority.” ...
Evander Kane And Alex Petrovic Fought Three Times In One Game
Sabres winger Evander Kane and Panthers defenseman Alex Petrovic dropped the gloves three times in Tuesday’s game. The two fought twice in the second period and once in the third....