w Page 2889 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Giancarlo Stanton Blesses Bachelorette Party With Healthy Dong
Giancarlo Stanton viciously smote a poor baseball into the right field stands in Camden Yards Saturday, where it was gathered by the overjoyed members of a bachelorette party wearing “Team Bride” hats:...
J.R. Smith Is No Longer So Certain He Knew The Score
J.R. Smith was pretty clear after Game 1 that he knew the score and situation at the end of regulation, and that what appeared to be an all-time blunder was, in fact, a combination of team-wide confusion and a running clock. The play sure didn’t look that way, but that was his story and, honestly, i...
Max Scherzer Saves The Day With Timely Hitting, Wait What
It will mean absolutely nothing to you to be told that Max Scherzer was a key contributor in a narrow Nationals win over the Atlanta Braves Saturday night. No shit, he’s their best pitcher and their best player, you are saying to an indifferent computer screen, like a true online psycho. Oh ho! This...
Maybe It Actually Is Okay For Caps Fans To Believe?
The Caps were still up by a goal after Braden Holtby’s incredible blunder in the third period of Saturday’s Game 3, but when it happened—the very instant Tomáš Nosek guided Holtby’s blind, panicked, incomprehensibly ill-advised give-away into the empty net—a vision of the next great gut-wrenching Ca...
The Sixers Really Need To Fire Bryan Colangelo Right Now
It’s no secret that the Sixers plan to court all the premier free agents this summer. It is also no secret that LeBron James will be the premier free agent this summer, seeking a long-term contract after he opts out of the final year of his deal in Cleveland. With that in mind, I hereby present LeBr...
Clay Matthews Takes Comebacker To The Face In Charity Softball Game
Clay Matthews was pitching in a charity softball game in Wisconsin Saturday when a sharply hit comebacker nailed him directly in his face, in front of the mound:...
NBA L2M Report: The Refs Made A Big Dumb Mess Of The End Of Game 1
It would be hard to overstate just how badly the Cavs were screwed by the universe at the end of Game 1 Thursday night. A rare reversed judgment call, an unexpected missed free throw, an uncalled lane violation, an apparent uncalled loose-ball foul, and an all-time blunder by one of their own, all i...
Tristan Thompson Avoids Suspension For Game 1 Tussle
The NBA announced Friday that Tristan Thompson has been fined $25,000 for cramming a basketball in the face of Draymond Green during the dismal final moments of Game 1. Thompson was issued a Flagrant 2 and ejected by referee Tony Brothers—who, along with his fellow Game 1 referees, will never again ...
UFC Fighter Somehow Accidentally Knocks Himself Out
Jarred “The Monkey God” Brooks lost his second UFC fight tonight because, well, he picked his opponent up and then fell on his head. Brooks was giving UFC debutante Jose Torres the business until the bizarre end to the fight. It was scored as a TKO win for Torres, who explained afterwards that he wa...
Weck, Scorned, Gets Revenge On Former Spouse
Update (June 2, 9:41 a.m.): The former BW3's apologizes for the “awful tweets” but not for their awful food: ...
Serena Williams Forgets How Many Grand Slam Doubles Titles She And Venus Have
After winning their second-round French Open doubles match in straight sets today, Venus and Serena Williams, who laugh and joke during most of their matches together, were asked what it’s like to play on the same side of the net. For someone talking about her and her sister’s sheer domination in ...
Your Guide To The CONIFA World Cup, The World Cup For Not-Quite-Countries<em></em>
LONDON — “We have nothing against FIFA,” CONIFA General Secretary Sascha Düerkop told a tittering press corps on Wednesday. We were all sitting in the basement of a student accommodation block in North London. “They are very great to learn how not to do things.” ...
Don't Let J.R. Smith Distract You From JaVale McGee's Own Incredibly Funny Failure
An NBA Finals game featuring Nick Young, J.R. Smith, and JaVale McGee was always bound to be full of goofs and gaffes, and while everyone is justifiably mocking Smith for forgetting how time and numbers work, let us not forget that McGee had perhaps an even funnier botched play in the third quarter....
Let's Look At Bryan Colangelo's Collars
Today is Sixers GM Bryan Colangelo’s 53rd birthday, and also possibly his final day of running the team’s post-Process regime in the wake of a Ringer report that Colangelo or someone very close to him ran up to five anonymous Twitter accounts dedicated to defending Colangelo and attacking his numero...
Peyton Manning Denies Claim In Court Filings That Peyton Manning Was Source For Peyton Manning PED Allegations<em></em>
Unsealed court papers claim Peyton Manning’s lawyers “confirmed much of what” a source told Al Jazeera about the retired NFL quarterback’s alleged PED usage along with that of MLBers Ryan Zimmerman and Ryan Howard, who are suing the network over claims made in the 2015 report....
Report: Senators Executive Arrested For Harassing Shuttle Bus Driver
Ottawa Senators assistant GM Randy Lee was arrested Thursday night in Buffalo for allegedly harassing a bus driver. The Associated Press first reported his arrest....
Danny Farquhar Gives First Interview Since Brain Hemorrhage
Here’s some nice news: White Sox reliever Danny Farquhar, who suffered a brain hemorrhage in the dugout during an April game, gave his first interview since returning home from the hospital. He sat down with Good Morning America on Friday to talk about his recovery for the first time, and while it’s...
So, Can LeBron Do That Four More Times?
J.R. Smith’s inexplicable game-ending dribbling demo is and should be the thing fans remember about Game 1 of these short-looking 2018 NBA Finals, but lost in all the hubbub around Smith’s all-time brain fart is that the Cavs absolutely should have won a road game against a Warriors team that really...
Tennis Player Accidentally Lights Up Ball Kid At French Open
During his third-round French Open match today against Alexander Zverev, Bosnian tennis player Damir Džumhur inadvertently wrecked a ball kid as he tried to catch an errant shot out of the air. The boy was shaken up, and Džumhur tried to comfort him with hugs, which was somehow even more awkward tha...