w Page 3612 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Browns Are Such A Godforsaken Mess
Dwayne Bowe is a “healthy inactive” for Raiders-Browns this afternoon, meaning there isn’t really anything wrong with Bowe, beyond his fundamental inability to play football well, but the Browns are sitting him anyway. This is only one of several stupid moving parts in the stupid fakakta machine tha...
Fresno State Scores Touchdown On Play We Don't Entirely Understand
What you see here is Fresno State’s Jamire Jordan scoring a touchdown to narrow San Jose State’s lead over the Bulldogs. But exactly what play this is, or what it is supposed to look like, we’re completely lost. Is it supposed to be a pass play? Did guys forget to block? Is it a completely broken an...
Maryland Cheerleader, Like The Terrapins, Is Getting Crushed
West Virginia is obliterating the Terrapins today, as the Mountaineers are already up 38-0 at the half. Taking things especially hard was this Maryland cheerleader who bore the brunt of Shelton Gibson’s 41-yard touchdown catch:...
Amara Darboh Celebrates U.S. Citizenship With One-Handed Circus Catch
Amara Darboh and his family fled the civil war in Sierra Leone when he was two years old, and after four years of moving across West Africa, he was eventually taken in by a family in Iowa. Both of his parents were killed in the fighting, and The Ann Arbor News has the definitive profile on him, whic...
Ex-Alabama St. Coach And Booster Get In A Fight During Deposition
Reggie Barlow was a decent NFL wide receiver for about a decade, where he played for some (somehow) good Jaguars teams and won a Super Bowl ring with the Buccaneers. After retiring, he quickly moved back home to Montgomery to coach his alma mater Alabama State football team. After eight relatively s...
jet fUel Can't meLt steel beAms: Your Tucson <i>College GameDay</i> Sign Roundup
Good morning! Welcome to another college football Saturday. Here’s what the Arizona scamps came up with for today’s College GameDay signs. Some of them are funny! Some of them are horrible. (Some are actually from the superior SEC Nation program!) ...
Nationals Cannot Stop Beating Selves, Allow Inside-The-Park Grand Slam
The Nationals really have no one to blame but themselves for probably losing their way out of a chance at the playoffs, and this play from tonight’s game against the 57-96 Phillies is a great example. Here’s Aaron Altherr driving home all three baserunners and himself thanks to a misplayed ball by M...
Cool Pope Readies Prog-Rock Album; Here Is The First Track
Yeah, you heard me. Rolling Stone has reported that Pope Francis will be releasing a “pop-rock” album entitled Wake Up in late November. The LP will feature “the Pontiff delivering sacred hymns and excerpts of his most moving speeches in multiple languages paired with uplifting musical accompaniment...
15 Years Ago, Vince Carter Jumped Over A 7-Footer And Dunked The Shit
Exactly 15 years ago today, Vince Carter jumped over 7-foot-2 French center Frédéric Weis and dunked the ball at the 2000 Sydney Olympics. You remember, right? Right....
Sean Payton Says Drew Brees Won't Play This Sunday
Saints quarterback Drew Brees messed up his shoulder after being hit in last Sunday’s game, and wasn’t immediately ruled out for this week, but it turns out his recovery wasn’t quick enough. Head coach Sean Payton said today that he’ll keep Brees out of this Sunday’s game against the Panthers....
<i>Elite Squad: The Enemy Within</i> Is The Next Stop For <i>Narcos</i> Fiends
There’s a very good chance you’ve spent some time in the past few week binging on Narcos, the new Netflix show about the unlikely career of one Pablo Escobar. It’s a great show, one that goes as wide as possible in considering all the effects of the U.S.’s war on drugs and its appetite for them. May...
Is A Parking Garage Really Not Liable If My Car Gets Damaged Or Stolen?
Welcome back to Ask a Lawyer, where I, a lawyer, respond to your questions. Got a vexing legal issue? Send it over, or drop it in the comments below. Today’s query:...
FIFA President Sepp Blatter Now Faces Criminal Investigation
Good news broke today, and that news is that Switzerland has opened a criminal investigation against Sepp Blatter, the current FIFA president who just will not die. He’s facing suspicion of “criminal mismanagement” and “misappropriation.”...
Madison Bumgarner Had An Endless, Awkward Staredown With Umpire Joe West
You know Joe West. Of course you know Joe West, because West is the only MLB umpire who thinks you’re there to see him instead of the game. Picking fights, escalating confrontations, offering opinions when none are asked for, and ejecting West craves being the center of attention, and wants nothing ...
Always-Wrong ESPN Fuck-Up Chris Broussard Wrong Yet Again
Resets the “Chris Broussard Has Worked __ Days Without Fucking Up A Report” sign in the Deadspin office....
Neutering Is Not The Worst Thing That Ever Happened To This Bichon
There’s been quite a kerfluffle in Minnesota over this second-best Bichon of 2011 and 2012, Beau Lemon. The dog’s owner, John Wangsness, sued breeder Vickie Halstead, claiming that instead of having the decorated dog bred, she had the dog neutered....
Canned Champagne Is Bad, And Also Perfect
I recently learned that you can buy champagne in cans thanks to the genius of Francis Ford Coppola vineyards. If you winced at that sentence, canned champagne is definitely not for you. For the rest of us, it’s delightful sparkling wine....
Chandler Parsons Started The Great NBA Emoji War By Accident
The DeAndre Jordan Standoff is one of the best story lines in the history of the NBA offseason, in part because it involved a wacky emoji war that swept across all of NBA social media. But now Mavericks forward Chandler Parsons, the man who started that war, says his opening salvo wasn’t even relate...
<i>Empire </i>Is Back, And More Ridiculous Than Ever
The second season of Empire opens with a #FreeLucious concert staged as a show of support for incarcerated Empire Records CEO Lucious Lyon (Terrence Howard). Bill Clinton is said to be in the crowd (“if he wants his wife to get elected”), Swizz Beatz is onstage, and Al Sharpton is backstage, along w...