w Page 3652 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Japan Score Scruffy Goal From A Corner, Progress To World Cup Semifinal
Look, they won’t all be wondrous moves drenched with class, genius, and magic pixie dust. But a winner is a winner, and Japan finally got theirs near the very end of their quarterfinal matchup against Australia....
US Track & Field Championships Simmering Til Done
Eugene, Ore., where the USA Track & Field National Championship is underway, is gripped in a heat wave. The steamy conditions produce a nice muscle-loosening affect on athletes whose events last less than 60 seconds, but it’s been less accommodating for the distance events. The preliminary rounds of...
CNN Freaks Out About Buttplug Flag At Pride Parade
“ISIS Flag Spotted At Gay Pride Parade” reads the lower-third graphic on CNN, which spent almost four minutes today talking up terror as the extremist faction apparently had infiltrated a London Pride march. Except that’s pretty clearly not an ISIS flag, unless the Islamic State is now really into b...
French Player Slams FIFA: "They Have To Stop Taking Us For Idiots"
As undeniably awesome as last night’s France-Germany match was, it was complete and utter bullshit that these two teams were forced to meet in the quarterfinals. Far from being an unforeseen, unlucky occurrence, this is exactly as FIFA planned it. And France’s Camille Abily, for one, is none too hap...
France Built The World's Best Women's Soccer Team And Still Lost
Not even a minute into last night’s highly-anticipated, criminally-premature title fight that was France vs. Germany, Les Bleues were off on one of their typical jaunts towards goal, one that exemplified everything that makes them such a special team....
Holy Shit, Bob Costas
Pedro Strop didn’t have the best performance out of the Cubs’ pen tonight, giving up a homer and then putting two more guys on base. But it apparently infuriated MLB Network’s Bob Costas, who hammered Strop with a burn so raw we can’t even endorse it:...
A Lovely Saison For The Red Clapboard Farmhouse Of Your Dreams
Dear Drunkspin,...
Who Is This Woman That Randomly Appeared On <i>Outside The Lines</i>? [UPDATE]
Here’s a weird one! Today’s Outside the Lines featured three men discussing Curt Flood with host Bob Ley: MLB.com’s Terence Moore, author Brad Snyder, and ESPN’s Doug Glanville. Also, a random woman whose brief presence was never addressed or explained, as far as we can tell. ...
Spain's Women's Team Is A Catastrophe, And It Doesn't Need To Be
In the week since the players for the Spanish women’s national team released their open letter requesting the firing of manager Ignacio Quereda, more and more has come to light about just how officious and reprehensible his leadership has been over the entirety of his 27 years in charge....
Tanzania's Goat Races Are Decadent And Depraved
Slumgoat Millionaire lost his first race at the Dar es Salaam Charity Goat Races. While the “owners” (sponsors, really) were standing in the corral at the center of the small racetrack, one of the MCs asked Slumgoat’s patron if he knew the rules....
CNN Forced To Go To Commercial After "About Fucking Time!" Invasion
CNN’s Ashleigh Banfield delivered same-sex marriage coverage this morning from outside the Stonewall Inn, only to have her live shot quickly abbreviated thanks to a boisterous man who repeatedly hollered, “ABOUT FUCKING TIME! ABOUT FUCKING TIME!” ...
Vikings CB: Same-Sex Marriage Ruling One Step Closer To Legal Pedophilia
The Supreme Court made same-sex marriage legal across the nation today. Minnesota Vikings cornerback Josh Robinson unwisely decided to express his opinion that the ruling represents the height of a slippery slope leading to the legalization of pedophilia and incest:...
NBA Draft Picks Choose Their Favorite Emoji; Justise Winslow Wins
Before last night’s draft, a handful of NBA prospects were asked for their favorite emoji. There were clear winners and losers....
Maybe Kristaps Porzingis Is An Okay Rapper After All
Here’s Krzykyzffgzl so and so, the Knicks’ top draft pick last night, singing a song in his car. At first I didn’t like this:...
Angry Umpire Demands That Jon Lester Fight Him
Yesterday’s game between the Dodgers and Cubs was delayed for several minutes when home plate umpire Andy Fletcher decided to go full Ump Show in the second inning, stalking Cubs starter Jon Lester back to the mound in order to establish his authority or whatever....
<i>Hot Fuzz </i>Is The Ultra-Rare Action-Comedy That Doesn't Suck
I don’t know who came up with the idea of the action-comedy, but that person deserves our entire scorn. The genre, which flourished in the late ’80s and early ’90s, was built around the idea that a comedy wasn’t really a movie unless it had a shoddily edited car chase at the end. This was the sort o...
Ty Lawson Sees His Future In A Cloud Of Hookah Smoke
You can always count on the NBA draft to produce a few a few memorable moments. Sobbing Knicks Child was the star of last night’s show, but Sad Ty Lawson Smoking Hookah ran a very close second....
Let's Make Some Kick-Ass Sangria!
Sangria is like summer itself: always good, but rarely as great as it could be. Due to their respective built-in advantages of cold, fruity alcohol and relative proximity to the sun, sangria and summer are tough to fuck up. But these same inherent strengths can lull us into a laziness that prevents ...
The First Round Of 2015 NBA Draft Is Finally Over
In case you missed our insightful and thought-provoking live-blog, the 2015 NBA Draft happened tonight, and, after what seemed like an eternity, the first round is finally over. ...