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Germany Ruin Brazil In World Cup; People Make Holocaust Jokes
Germany routed Brazil, 7-1 in today's World Cup semifinal. Many were sad. Others saw the opportunity for Holocaust jokes....

Brazil's Meltdown Was Too Sad For The World-Cup-Logo-As-Facepalm Meme
The "World Cup logo as a sad, facepalming guy" meme has been around since the start of the tournament. When Brazil was down 5-0 to Germany, it looked like this version, via @dorybenami, would end up being the perfection of the meme. And then Brazil went ahead and conceded two more goals. So much for...

Germany Smashed Brazil So Hard It's Good For America
Germany became the first team to score five goals in the first 29 minutes of any World Cup game in history. It ended 7-1, but if we can summon just a touch more jingoistic national sentiment, we say fuck it, cheer for the Germans. They scrubbed America off the wrong side of the record book. ...

Meanwhile, In Germany...
That is the image that links to German paper Bild's liveblog of today's 5-0 dismantling of Brazil. All you need to know is that Tor means goal in German to get that the Germans seem to be handling this a little better than the Brazilians....

Brazil Fans Are Losing Their Minds
Here's the staff at the Youth With A Mission nonprofit in Saint-Marc, Haiti, reacting to the fourth of five Germany goals in the first half. They appear to be Brazil supporters. Anger is a legitimate alternative to sadness. ...

Wrestling Legend "J.R." Jim Ross Calling The Brazil-Germany Highlights
How do you improve upon the highlights from Germany's 7-1 thrashing of Brazil? By adding wrestling legend Jim Ross to the goal calls, that's how. [Updated with the second half goals.]...

All Of Brazil Is Crying Right Now
Literally. All of it....

Your Brazil-Germany Open Thread
Well, it's already 1-0, Germany, but it's still early. Talk about it here....

Germany Have A 5-0 Lead Over Brazil
Germany are fucking up Brazil faster than we can update right now. Right now, currently, it's 5-0 after 30 minutes....

Girls Chase Brazil's Team Bus Down The Street, One Eats It
We get wanting a candid shot of your idols in the Seleçao, but Jesus, girls, not on the side of the road like that! Those cars are moving pretty fast!...

Jim Harbaugh Attended Another Baseball Game With His Favorite Glove
49ers coach Jim Harbaugh, in peak dad mode, took in last night's Diamondbacks game with Arizona exec Tony La Russa. Because of course Jim Harbaugh knows Tony La Russa. ...

Brazil vs. Germany: Live Online Streaming Links
It's semi-final time. Here's where to find Brazil-Germany on TV or live online stream....

Defending World Cup Champions Are Screwed if They're Old
With Spain out in the group stage this year, there will be no repeat champion in Brazil. Do any of the remaining four teams stand a good chance of repeating? The Economist compared the average ages of defending World Cup champions and found younger teams tend to do better. ...

Tony Wroten Nearly Flees From His Own Incredible Shammgod Crossover
Tony Wroten's Shammgod crossover is spectacular, but what we are really here to admire is how damn excited Wroten is about his Shammgod crossover....

The Whitening Of Neymar: How Color Is Lived In Brazil
Originally published in Africa Is A Country....

Why Wounded Brazil Are Still Favorites Against Germany
[Update: Nah.]...

Cops: Two Miami Players Admit Sex Assault On "Physically Helpless" Teen
Two Miami linebackers, Alex Figueroa and JaWand Blue, have been arrested and charged with sexual battery after admitting to raping a "mentally or physically incapacitated" 17-year-old girl in a campus dorm over the weekend....

Will Germany's Misuse Of Their Best Player Doom Them This World Cup?
Joachim Löw knew something needed to change. ...

Dani Alves And David Luiz Love Stretching Together Very Awkwardly
Trying to avoid the injury fates of Jozy Altidore, Ángel di María, and so many other fellow competitors, Dani Alves and David Luiz were seen getting very limber yesterday ahead of today's semifinal. Who knew Brazilian stretching routines so resembled ice dancing?...

Fugitive Arrested After Making Dumb Redskins Joke In Newspaper
Here is a tip for anyone that is currently a fugitive: Do not let a newspaper put your picture and full name in print, even if it is in the service of crapping on the Washington Redskins' racist name....