w Page 4844 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
It's Gallimaufry Time!
If you thought we're being lazy for only doing this once a year, imagine how lazy you'll think we're being when we make one of our entries the......
Titties Vs. VORP
Yo, you like tits? Yeah, me too. Titties is awesome....
The Jets Introduced A Car Service For Players The Week Before Braylon Edwards's DUI
As pointed out this morning (and ReTweeted by Peter King — cats and dogs living together, mass hysteria), the most galling thing about Edwards driving drunk is the sheer number of alternatives. Here's another one: the Jets provide free cars and drivers....
Dork Beats Other Dork: The King Of Kong Returns
The guy from The King of Kong is once again The King of Kong. Steve Wiebe retook the world-record from Billy Mitchell, and the wussiest rivalry in the world was given new life. Bring on the sequel. [Seattle Post-Intelligencer]...
We Have Chosen A Winner Of The Jason Whitlock Photoshop Contest (Gallery)
Yesterday's Jason Whitlock Photoshop Cattle Call provided us with a host of wonderful pictures, but we had to narrow them down to this gallery and pick a winner. Winner and honorable mentions after the jump (second prize, pictured here, goes to Murray Hewitt; good show)....
You Catch A Helmet At A Football Game, You Get Yourself A Radio Interview
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the guy who caught Brandon Jacobs's helmet....
This Is Supposedly Braylon Edwards' Mugshot
Photo: Sent to us by a reader who had a "Buddy in the NYPD."...
God Gave Mark Dantonio A Heart Attack For Beating Notre Dame, Says Soon-To-Be-Suspended Radio Guy
We said it's time to let the MSU/ND game go. Matt Patrick, of a South Bend talk radio station, should probably have read us before he insinuated that God struck Dantonio down for cheating against the Catholics....
Last Night's Winner: Matt Diaz, Corner Outfield Vigilante
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like visiting players at Citizens Bank Park, who, since the Taser incident, are apparently the last line of defense against fans on the field....
Won't Someone Think Of The Gay-Panicky Columnist's Children?
For a master class in how to write a breathtakingly stupid sports column from the Cokie Roberts school of "How will we tell the children about blowjobs?" argumentum ad moppet, please read FanHouse's David Whitley, hemming and hawing about gays on the Kiss Cam....
Wealthy Jets Receiver Braylon Edwards Gets Pinched For DWI In City With Most Cabs Ever
After being stopped by police for driving erratically and blowing twice the legal limit, chinbeard enthusiast Braylon Edwards was charged with DWI Tuesday. The Jets, who have a car service for partying players, were astonished someone actually drove in Manhattan. [Daily News]...
After Enough Time Had Passed, Cousin Itt Finally Forgave Them For Imploding The Vet
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
This Photo Of Jason Whitlock Is Begging To Have A Hamburger Photoshopped Into It
Congratulations to our nemesis Jason Whitlock for the big NYT's write-up on his controversial sports journalism and how it's propelled him to media fame and a fortune big enough to own a house in Los Angeles and one in Kansas City....
One Cross-Country Gal's Surname Must Be A Nightmare For Headline Writers
There's a high school cross country runner named Madz Negro who keeps making news due to her running prowess. This results in headlines from the Springfield, Ill. State Journal-Register like this. Or like this....
So, The FBI Stopped A Suspected Terrorist From Blowing Up Wrigley Field And Environs
A Lebanese man was arrested early Sunday and has been charged with one count each of attempted use of a weapon of mass destruction and attempted use of an explosive device after allegedly trying to blow up Wrigley Field. Typical Cardinals fan....
Do You Believe In Owning A Sad, Bedridden Ex-Hockey Player's Cherished Keepsake? Yes!
A gold medal that once belonged to Mark Wells, the last player selected for the 1980 "Miracle on Ice" hockey team, now laid low by a genetic disease of the spinal cord, is going up for auction. [Puck Daddy]...
The Guy Who Bought That Georgia Player's Jersey Is Innocent, Or Something
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the guy who bought A.J. Green's jersey....
Notes On "Campdick": A Former NFLer On Ines Sainz And Locker-Room Sexual Tension
A babe reporter walks into a locker room. Catcalls ensue; jock straps fly; penises shrivel. She doesn't understand the words, but she understands the sexual tension. It's palpable when an attractive woman appears. Palpable. Players call it campdick....
The New Internet-Friendly OK Go Music Video Is Here
Viral (music) video makers OK Go are back with another video. Gone are the treadmills and creative use of green screens, in are cup-stacking and a bunch of highly trained super dogs. It's better than "November Rain's" video, I guess....