w Page 5019 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

LA Headline Writers Need Sensitivity Training
"Injuries Haven't Killed Angels," trumpets the headline in the LA Daily News. Except for, you know, that injury that killed an Angels player four months ago. [LADN]...

Hardline Twitter Memo Makes ESPN Employees Hilariously Paranoid
ESPN NBA writer Ric Bucher set the World Wide Leader's legion of writers, editors, and on-air personalities with raging Twitter habits into a collective shit-tizzy with one of his updates. Now, a revolution is afoot! Not really....

Sandra Bullock Will Ride Michael Oher To Oscar Glory
For those in the dark, this is the movie version of Michael Lewis' book about Baltimore's No. 1 draft pick Michael Oher, a hulking black kid who was taken into the loving embrace of a lily white family in rural Mississippi after they found him bleeding and hungry on the side of the road. The fact th...

Minor Leaguer Convicted Of Assault After Basebrawl Gone Wrong
Remember that vicious minor league brawl that took an ugly turn when pitcher Julio Castillo chucked a 90-m.p.h. fastball at an innocent fan? It appears that people were not happy about that! And by people I mean judges and prosecutors....

It Might Be Time For ESPN To Update Its Sidebar
The schedule is out, so it's time to gear up for the NBA season ... in 2006, apparently. Hey ESPN, would you like us to hold Seattle down while you twist its nipple and take its lunch money? [ESPN]...

A Fond Remembrance Of The Night Nolan Ryan Kicked Robin Ventura's Punk Ass
Today, as you know, is the 16th anniversary: "It was 46 year old Nolan Ryan knocking the Sam-Hell out of a 25 year old wet behind the ears pup. You know dads all over America smiled that night ..." [Diamondhoggers.com]...

For A Guy With A Neck Tattoo, Delonte West Is Not A Very Good Freestyler
Cavs' guard Delonte West has spent the summer putting together his own YouTube diary of madness. Today we find him at the KFC drive-thru, waiting on a bucket of The Colonel's crack, spouting off a nonsensical rhyme about his predicament....

Alexander Ovechkin Is Here To Do Two Things: Play Hockey And Sex Your Women
And hockey season is over. Russia Today gets to the bottom Alex Ovechkin's life, complete with helpful on-screen guides. Revelations: He's ugly, sadness makes him cry, and sex is good. You're welcome. [Puck Duddy]...

Terrible Ratings Won't Stop Onslaught Of Sports Reality Shows
There have been a lot of sports-themed reality shows on TV lately—Superstars, Fourth and Long, The T.O. Show, etc.—and they all have two things in common. They are terrible and people hate them. So let's greenlight some more!...

Why Your Team Sucks: Tennessee Titans
Some people are fans of the Tennessee Titans. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Tennessee Titans. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

"Assault In The Ring" Reminds You To Hate Boxing Forever
You may have already seen the HBO documentary "Assault In The Ring," but if you haven't yet, put it on your to-do list. Just in case you've forgotten that boxing is filled, top to bottom, with unbelievable scumbags....

Rex Ryan Reveals "The Art" Of Breaking Up Training Camp Fights
"The reason you do that is because your buddy can get another shot in on somebody. You don't want to pull off your guy and he gets hit. I mean, that's just the way it is." [SI]...

Fart-Gate Officially The Dumbest Sports "Scandal" Of The Year
So this is actually a thing now? Several major media outlets devoted real newsprint to the mysterious case of Tiger Woods’ non-flatulence. Lawyers got involved. Official statements have been issued. Answers have been demanded. How did this come to be?...

Why Your Team Sucks: Jacksonville Jaguars
Some people are fans of the Jacksonville Jaguars. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Jacksonville Jaguars. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Plaxico Burress Indicted, Antonio Pierce Isn't
File this under things we would have posted yesterday, if we could have. There's a very high probability that Plaxico Burress is going to jail for accidentally shooting himself in the leg. [NYTimes]...

Our Tech Team Is Victorious Once Again
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

If A Photo Of A Norwegian Black Metal Band Is On Deadspin, That Means Shit Is Seriously Messed Up
For real. This is the first snow day since I've been at Gawker, but the server problems are quite severe this time site-wide and it's making everyone's day miserable. So we're shutting it down for today....

Mysterious, Gaseous Noise Invades The Buick Open
Unless CBS had a special microphone right next to his ass, it doesn't seem plausible that Woods could be the culprit. Yes, just a few seconds before blast-off, we see Woods loosening his hamstrings by kicking his legs up behind him, followed by the alleged fart, then a shot of he and caddy Steve Wil...

LenDale White's Revolutionary "No Tequila" Diet
Football fans have been marveling at the transformation of Titans' running back LenDale White, who has trimmed his previous bowling ball-like physique down to a svelte 228-pound Mack Truck. So how did he do it? By not eating worms, obviously....

The Legend Of Green Man
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....