wins Page 68 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Open Thread: Can You Write The Dumbest Story Ever About Derek Jeter?
Earlier today I suggested that Brian Lewis's New York Post piece today was the dumbest thing written about Derek Jeter....
Twins Fans Grasp Coprophilia-Based Humor Better Than Any Other MLB Fanbase
Francisco Liriano fell to 1-7 on the season as the Cubs rocked the Twins in Minneapolis Sunday. While some Minnesota fans think the team as a whole is playing like shit, insiders point to the crappy performance by several players—Liriano and fellow pitcher Carl Pavano among them. Don't count the Tw...
The Twins Couldn't Even Give Jeff Manship A Jersey With His Name Spelled Correctly
Poro Jffe Mansihp. Hs'e bene ni teh Minnestoa orginzatoin sinec 2006, adn hs'e boucned bakc adn forht bewteen teh minros adn teh Twisn sinec maknig hsi bgi-leauge deubt ni '09. Hee wsa juts callde upp fro teh firts tiem thsi seasno Mya 27, adn lsat nihgt wsa hsi firts appearacne ni na awya gaem, os ...
Property Owners Suing Kellen Winslow Jr. For Leaving Behind Shit-Stained House With $133,000 In Damages
Kellen Winslow Jr. is basically a deadbeat tenant, according to a lawsuit recently filed by property owners of a luxury home he rented for six months last year in Rancho Santa Fe, Calif....
Here Are The Best Entries In Our Drunk, Sulking Patrick Kane Photoshop Contest
This fine entry kicked off our Patrick Kane photoshop contest, but somehow we knew our wise readers had more in store. And you did not disappoint. I've picked the best ones here—with special commendation for our winner at the end—because we can cram only so many images into a gallery, but keep in mi...
Can You Beat This Entry In Our Patrick Kane Photoshop Contest?
One enterprising reader—VidaBlueManGroup—decided to kick off a Drunk Patrick Kane photoshop contest. I think he won it already, by dropping Kaner's Charlie Brown walk into Abbey Road—but we're hungry for a runner-up. We prefer doctored photos that use sulking Kaner, as opposed to party Kaner, but we...
Jered Weaver Had A Pretty Generous Strike Zone During His No-Hitter
The red squares were called strikes in Weaver's favor by home plate umpire Mark Carlson. The human element, everybody....
For Interfering With That Foul Ball The Other Day, Matt Geiger Got Called An Asshole By An Old Woman In A Wheelchair
Former NBA big man Matt Geiger has given a radio interview about the brain fart he had in the eighth inning of Sunday's Twins-Rays game, which we first showed you the other day. Geiger said he got caught up in the moment because he was hoping to get a ball he could give to his 4-year-old son....
Twins Prospect Reggie Williams Doesn't Hate Gay People, He Just Wants To Know Why There Are So Many Of Them These Days
About a year ago this article about Twins prospect Reggie Williams was published on mlb.com. It was a nice little profile on a guy trying to make it in the big leagues while also giving back to his community. He sounds like a pretty decent, thoughtful guy really. Except, tonight he engaged in an ot...
Police Raid Home Of Man Who Claims He Was Carl Pavano's Lover
A high school classmate of Twins pitcher Carl Pavano is under investigation for allegedly demanding money from Pavano's family in exchange for not going public with his story—that he and Pavano supposedly had a three-year "emotional and physical" relationship two decades ago. Christian Bedard, of So...
Twin Sisters Are Iditarod Racers
We don't get much Iditarod coverage around these parts, so thank you to tipster Brandon for sending this along. Anna and Kristy Berington are Wisconsin natives living in Alaska. Above all else, they are trailblazing dog racers. As you read this they are probably mushing their way through the Alaska...
Your Doug Gottlieb Jerkoff Kid Photoshop Roundup
After we finally stopped laughing at that fantastic .gif of the kid who made blowjob motions last week behind ESPN's Doug Gottlieb, we knew we had to turn to you. By dangling another prize of some stupid crap from our desk, we asked for your photoshops, and once again you came through. Jim Cooke, ou...
After Latest Injury, Joel Zumaya Might Become A Professional Fisherman
The former Tigers flamethrower, whose Twins career ended with a UCL tear before really starting, told the AP, "I'm a pretty dang good fisherman, so I might pursue professional fishing." Watch for tendinitis when you reel 'em in, buddy....
Photoshop Contest: That Jerkoff Kid Behind Doug Gottlieb
We can't stop marveling at the brilliant juvenile hijinks displayed last night at the Kansas State-Missouri game by the young man sitting directly behind Doug Gottlieb, which our own Tim Burke so memorably captured in a .gif we posted this morning. But there's no reason for the fun to stop there; t...
The Piggyback Bandit Has Now Been Banned From High School Sporting Events In Minnesota, Too
On Friday we brought you an update to the story of Sherwin Shayegan, the inveterate piggyback bandit, who's spread his terror throughout the northern United States over the past several years....
28-Year-Old Man Banned From North Dakota High School Basketball Games After Allegedly Dressing In Uniform And Asking For Piggyback Rides
Last we checked in with the "Piggyback Bandit," a little over two years ago, he was terrorizing the state of Washington, lurking around libraries and gyms and stealing piggyback rides from unsuspecting athletes....
Man Named Tom Brady Says Thing, Radio Station Reports
"I'm Tom Brady, I'm from Staten Island and I predict Giants will prevail," Tom Brady told some poor reporter at 1010 WINS who drew the short straw. When you're scraping the bottom of Rick Reilly's barrel for Super Bowl week stories, it's probably time to rethink things....
Trinity's Obnoxious 13-Year Squash Winning Streak Is Finally Over, Thanks To Obnoxious Yalies
The longest and most annoying win streak in the history of college sports is finally over. The Yale men's squash team defeated Trinity College 5-4 last night, ending the team's 13-year, 252-match undefeated streak that will be remembered for reminding us, approximately once a year, that squash is ...
City Of New York Cancels Mutton-Bustin', Rodeo's Greatest Event
The scores of finance bros and curious onlookers who crowded into Madison Square Garden for the arena's annual dabble in rodeo over the weekend did not get an authentic picture of the tradition. They had overpriced pints of light beer and Cracker Jacks; some, I'm sure, had worn plaid and cowboy hats...
MLB's New Security Chief, A Former SF Giant, Once Denied Monica Lewinsky Entry To The Oval Office
It's weird to think about MLB executives doing anything other than MLB-executive-ing. I can't think of Bud Selig cutting timber, for example. But a story in the Washington Post introduces us to Bill Bordley, the league's new chief of security, who pitched for the Giants before joining the Secret Ser...