wins Page 72 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Sausage Race Nearly Ends In Vehicular Manslaughter
Milwaukee's annual Opening Day Beef Tube Relay Race took a hilarious, nearly tragic turn when the Italian sausage was almost run over by its police escort. When did Randall Simon become a cop? [Last Angry Fan; video via]...
Smoking Pot At Target Field Earns Man A Stern "Warning"
Target Field has not hosted an official Major League game yet, so people are probably wondering: What's the policy on lighting up homemade vegetable bongs in the stands? Early tests of the system suggest that Dave is not here, man....
Denard Span Smacks His Own Mother! (With A Foul Ball)
A woman wearing a Denard Span jersey is plunked by a line drive off the bat of Denard Span. What kind of person wears a Denard Span jersey to a spring training game? Yep, it was his mom. [LoHud]...
Minnesota Twins: R.I.P. Baseball Anomaly, And Competitive Advantage
Will Leitch will be previewing/musing on every baseball team each weekday until the start of the season. You can pre-order his book and follow him on Twitter. Today: The Minnesota Twins....
Terrified Children Still Being Thrown, Taunted By Angry Sheep
It's been a while since we've had a quality bustin' incident featured here, but thankfully the heartless marketing team of the Colorado Mammoth's professional lacrosse organization recently let the mighty sheep embarrass some over-matched tots during halftime. Mutton victorious....
A Children's Treasury Of Mascots Eating People
Mascots are running wild at our sporting events, both home and abroad. Who will put a stop to the madness? And why won't the music coordinators at these arenas use Temple of the Dog in place of Weird Al?...
Joe Mauer's Imaginary Contract Has A Lot Of "I"s To Dot
Remember when Joe Mauer "agreed" to that 10-year contract over a month ago? Well, Mauer's agent plans to discuss the matter with Twins management very soon. Maybe. They're very close! (Yeah, they're not close.) [SN/Star-Tribune/NYT]...
An Intern Introduction And A Poop-Related Apology
Hello. If you haven't heard, I'm the new Deadspintern (feel free to suggest a nickname). I hope you have enjoyed what I've done so far because it's been a real hoot....
Monster Dutch Reliever Hopes To Terrorize Twin Cities
The Twins have high hopes for Loek van Mil, a 7-foot-1 prospect from the Netherlands. Because betting on the freakishly tall foreigner has always worked out in other sports. [Pioneer Press]...
Raptors Mascot Fails To Sublimate Prey Drive, Eats Cheerleader
Also found in his digestive tract: Hedo Turkoglu's jump shot. [YouTube]...
Stories That Don't Suck: Death On The Track, Ebert's Silence, NASCAR's Backlash Ethos, Bubba In Love
Every week, I'll excerpt a handful of stories — old and new, sports and otherwise, relevant and merely sublime — that I urge you to read for one reason or another. Send any suggestions to [email protected]....
Pat Neshek Gets Horrible Fan Mail
Really, the shocking thing about this letter is not that it was sent — autograph hounds represent the lowest phylum of baseball fan — but that this Twins enthusiast didn't ask for Kent Hrbek, Tony Oliva, and Walter Johnson, too....
Man Claims Sportsbook Stiffed Him On Silly Kim Kardashian Prop Bet...Which They Did
A reader placed a tiny wager on what color top Reggie Bush's gilrfriend would wear to the Super Bowl. His choice? Black. It appears, in that photo, to be black. He claims Bodog.com would not pay out. Who will die?...
BOOOOBS!:A Gripping Photojournalistic Account Of The Monterrey, Mexico, Flashing Incident
The most amusing part of this NSFW gallery of Leah Catherine Spencer, the Lone Wolf of Monterrey, Mexico, are the sweaty guys jockeying for iPhone close-ups and the boundless joy she brought to soccer fans that day. Especially the children....
Presenting...The Deadspin Miami Super Bowl Bounty Hunt
Sadly, no one from Deadspin's masthead will physically be traveling down to Miami this year to take part in the annual Super Bowl festivities. Unfortunately, that does not mean assorted media personalities and athletes can carouse freely without torment. Continue....
Last Night's Winner: Minnesotans
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Twins fans who locked up their franchise catcher for the next decade. It's not official, but what could possibly go wrong in the final seconds?...
Greg Oden's Gigantic Penis Is Also Healing Nicely
GOOD LORD. What the hell's gotten into Greg Oden? First he's spotted in a bright orange novelty T-shirt and now, he's one of the many too-proud athletes to snap a naked photo of himself in the bathroom. ABSOLUTELYNSFWORYOURMASCULINITYAFTERTHEJUMP....
Scared Children Still Being Trampled By Angry Sheep, TV News Reports
Mutton bustin' is huge, according to some weird Fox News story that features terrifying video from Denver's National Western Stock Show. For example? "In a year-end post, sports blog Deadspin highlighted the year in mutton." We're tastemakers now! [MyFox]...
A Boise State Fiesta Bowl Win Makes Everyone On The Field Amorous (KOGOD Update)
Remember the last time Boise State won the Fiesta, Statue of Liberty hero Ian Johnson got down on one knee and proposed to his cheerleader girlfriend. Freshman o-lineman Michael Ames also experienced the spoils of victory....
The Guy In The Rae Carruth Jersey Went On A Beer Run
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....