wins Page 73 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Serena Williams Beats Out Horse For AP Female Athlete Of The Year
Yes, Zenyatta, "who capped a 14-0 career by becoming the first female horse to win the Breeders' Cup Classic" came in second. Kim Clijsters came in third. Fourth? Artie Lange. [ESPN.com]...
Metrodome Bathroom Swallows Another Victim
The Metrodome will not let the Twins escape easily, even if it has to trap former Rookies of the Year inside its porcelain bowels for all eternity....
Roller Derby Twins Make Good
That's odd. ESPN's Page 2 has a story from a blonde girl who lives with her twin sister in New York City and tried out for the local roller derby ... heyyyyyyy, wait a second.......
<em>Life & Style</em> Goes Fishing For Tiger Tales
A Life & Style reporter is searching for information about Joslyn James. If anyone can help her, please contact her immediately. I won't be able to help, unfortunately. Her email, after the jump....
Porn Actress Reveals Sordid Details Of Her Tiger Fling: "His Teeth Are Perfect"
Below is a video from May in which Holly Sampson — star of MILF Bone 4; OMG, Stop Tickling Me; and an episode of Matlock — discusses her one-night fling with Tiger Woods, "perfect gentleman."...
Same Person Keeps Terorrizing Grady Sizemore, Girlfriend Says
According to Grady's girlfriend, one Miss Brittany Binger, the latest round of private photos to hit the internet were the work of the same dastardly individual who hacked into her email account months ago. And Grady's pissed....
And Now TMZ Turns Tiger Woods Into Lionel Richie With One Fateful Post
Here we go: "Tiger Woods did not suffer facial lacerations from a car accident. They were inflicted by his wife, Elin Nordegren — according to a conversation Woods had Friday after the accident." And when he tried to get away......
In Amazing Coincidence, Two Michigan State Players Kicked Off Team
Junior Roderick Jenrette and sophomore Glenn Winston were dismissed from Michigan State's football team two days after unidentified football players were accused of beating up frat boys in a residence hall. Gee, you think it might be the same guys?...
Put Away Your Calculators. Joe Mauer Is MVP
Indignant nerds may stand down. Your numerically eviscerating PowerPoint presentation about Derek Jeter's faults is both lovely and precise, but will not be needed this year. (Only an idiotic first-place vote for Miguel Cabrera kept it from being unanimous.) [MPR]...
And Now A Selection From Tim McCarver's "Great American Songbook" Remixed
During the MLB playoffs, Fox baseball analyst extraordinaire Tim McCarver released a CD of him crooning through jaunty Cole Porter-style songs without a smidge of irony. We had grand plans for this. Some fell through, but one miraculously worked out....
Metrodome Memories Are A Little Pathetic
Since the Twins have a fancy new field, it was time to get rid of all the leftover stuff at the Metrodome. A phrase comes to mind: "And nothing of value was lost."...
Thanks For Mutton
ESPN's E:60 investigative arm has once again cracked the case, introducing the rest of the Western world—at least the part that doesn't read this fair website—to the phenomenon of mutton bustin'....
Sean Salisbury's Lawsuit
It has arrived. The suit says Deadspin has cost Mr. Salisbury money, future employment, and mental stability due to its repeated malicious attacks, which Salisbury himself noted several times via his iPhone meltdown last month. All aboard....
Mutton But The Truth
I can think of no better way to end this week than with a photo of a bootless child being maimed by a haughtily superior sheep as a rodeo clown tries vainly to help. Unpack this metaphor as you will....
When There Is Blood, There Is Backlash
The blogosphere weighs in on yesterday's ESPN hurdy-gurdy fest. Criticisms are abundant and, for the most part, fair. Dished/Taken. [SBNation/SportingBlog]...
ESPN Horndog Dossier: Erik Kuselias (UPDATED)
Who? Right. Exactly. But Mr. Kuselias, as tiny an orb as he may be in the ESPN galaxy, has solidified his reputation as "the biggest douchebag in the place," according to multiple sources. But what about that sex-harassment thing?...
The Roller Derby Twins Spectacle
I was a little alarmed to find out the NY Times did a huge feature on Katie and Kristy Barry, two nice young woman whom I had the pleasure of meeting for a drink a couple weeks ago....
Someone Just Blew This Guy's Mind
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Phil Cuzzi's Career Trajectory Not Exactly A String Of Successes
Phil Cuzzi was once fired as a minor league umpire, and later appealed to the league president while tending bar at a New Jersey hotel. Twins fans could still use a stiff drink. [Augusta Chronicle, via FanHouse]...
Does This Look Foul To You?
Good thing that Major League Baseball adds two extra umpires to cover those close plays down the line in the playoffs. That way no one will have any grounds to complain that a bad call completely ruined their season....