Tennis Page 105 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Serena's Comeback Tally: One Win, One Smashed Racket, And Almost A Broken Nail
Serena Williams knocked off Tsvetana Pironkova in the first round at the Eastbourne Tennis Tournament today, 1-6, 6-3, 6-4. There were two very good signs in the scandal-stirrer's first return to professional tennis in over a year: the first was that she won, despite a rough first set, and the sec...

John McEnroe: Not All Of You Journalists Are Assholes
The classic 1980 Wimbledon Final between John McEnroe and Björn Borg has been dissected more than any match in tennis history. But the friendship that developed between the two, before and since, hasn't been as picked over, in part because Borg, who abruptly left the sport at age 26, has been genera...

Mavericks Fan Sitting Behind George Lopez Speaks For All America
Your morning roundup for June 6, the day we learned the value of Bernie Madoff's underwear. H/T @bubbaprog, proprietor of mocksession.com, for accurately predicting what might tickle us this morning (and others for sending in their own grabs)....

Austrian Tennis Player Gets Lifetime Ban For Match-Fixing, Being A Huge Dick
Daniel "Crazy Dani" Köllerer has been banned from tennis for life and fined $100,000 by the ATP. Harsh. What'd he do?...

OK, We'll Ask: What's Going On With Roger Federer's Magic Bulge?
At left, a screengrab of Roger Federer from today's French Open semifinal. At right, a wire photo from Federer's quarterfinal matchup on Tuesday. Exact same outfit: much more prominent frank and beans....

Roger Federer Causes Fan Hysteria, Loss In Gravity
The poor girl just wanted a selfie with the maestro, and all she got was a pitying hug. But — and I say this as a former boy band fanatic — I would not completely rule out the possibility that there was some kind of ulterior motive going on here. After all, a pitying hug from Roger Federer is stil...

Viktor Troicki Can Blame His French Open Exit On A 12-Year-Old Boy
Viktor Troicki, the 15 seed in the French Open, nearly upset No. 4 Andy Murray today in Paris, in a five set match that took two days to complete. Murray won 4-6, 4-6, 6-3, 6-2, 7-5, but in a game in which any single point can swing the momentum of a match, Troicki will likely remember his interru...

Rafael Nadal's Post-Match Comments Display The Self-Esteem Of A Teenage Girl
Rafael Nadal may not be quite on Novak Djokovic's unbeatable level, but, uh, he's still number one in the world. You'd think that would manifest itself in his words with reporters after a straight-sets victory over Ivan Ljubicic today....

Novak Djokovic Is So Good That He Already Won Tomorrow's Match
Take note, aspiring tennisfolk, because this is the kind of thing that happens for you if you're on a 41-match win streak in 2011....

At Least One Bounce Went Right For Kim Clijsters In Her Second-Round Exit
Kim Clijsters, seeded No. 2 in the French Open, lost to Arantxa Rus (real name) in the second round yesterday. She fell 3-6, 7-5, 6-1 to the 114th-ranked player in the world. But it wasn't all bad! Clijsters also had one of the most fantastical bounces we've ever seen in tennis. This is the kind o...

47 Of Maria Sharapova's Grunts In Her Second-Round French Open Win
Maria Sharapova faced Caroline Garcia, a 17-year-old French up-and-comer, in the second round of the French Open today. Garcia took the first set and led 4-1 until midway through the second, when Sharapova took 11 straight games to win, 3-6, 6-4, 6-0. Sharapova's known for her grunting, of course;...

Admiring Novak Djokovic's Last 40 Match Points
Novak Djokovic has won 38 straight tennis matches in the 2011 season, and he hasn't lost in 40 outings, dating back to November's Davis Cup. His dominance has been nearly absolute; in seven months, he's dropped just eight sets, and that includes seven wins against either Rafael Nadal or Roger Fede...

A Panicky Column About The Scandalous Thing Serena Williams Just Did
Serena Williams did a scandalous thing recently. That she did something scandalous is no surprise; that she did something this scandalous is truly shocking....

Roger Federer Lost, But He Still Managed To Do Something Only Roger Federer Can Do
Roger Federer dropped his third round Italian Open match, 4-6, 7-6 (2), 7-6 (4), to Richard Gasquet yesterday. "I definitely feel I should never have lost this match," Federer said afterwards. "I just couldn't come up with the shots." This one, of all shots, he came up with....

Rafael Nadal Hits A Perfectly Placed Lob From Between His Legs, Just Because He Can
Here's Rafa just havin' some fun on his home court at the Madrid Open yesterday, in his straight-set loss to Novak Djokovic. This is the "statement shot" of tennis; like basketball's behind-the-back pass or soccer's nutmeg, its sole purpose is to say, without saying it, "look at what I can do." On...

Phil Jackson Agrees That His Career Has Been The "Bee's Knees"
Your morning roundup for May 9, the day we learned of the Village tree thief....

Serena Williams Has A Stalker
The Palm Beach County Sheriff's Office confirmed to WPTV that they had arrested Patenema Ouedraogo, 40, for stalking Serena Williams in Florida early this morning. He has reportedly "tried to make contact with Williams several times in the past" and is being held on a $25,000 bond. [WPTV]...

Rafael Nadal 0, His Underwear 1
Reporting that Rafael Nadal won a match on a clay surface is a lot like reporting that the Mets lost a game, so we needed another angle on his 6-2, 6-2 win over Gael Monfils in the Barcelona Open quarterfinals today. Luckily, the cameras on hand for the match captured that angle for us. In the inc...

Venus Serena Williams Returns To The Court In Fabulous Pink Catwoman Outfit
When one comes back from injury, one should do it in style. Maybe Venus Serena will wear the mask part of this ensemble for her French Open warmup tournament in Brussels next month. Please. Photo via Serenawilliams twitter....

John McEnroe Will Swear At You For An Hour For Just $28,500
There's an online charity open through Thursday that will grant two lucky — I mean absurdly wealthy — people an hour-long tennis lesson with John McEnroe at Randall's Island in New York City. The bid is currently at $26,000. The money will go towards saving the earth (literally, I guess?), so we can...