The New Yankee Stadium: Where Apt Metaphors Are In Abundance

The fancy-pants stadium seats aren't selling. Fans are pissed . The A-Rod mess. 0-5 against the Sox. And now, fans are doing flying kicks. This is the 2009 Yankees season so far.

Let's rundown just some of the things that have happened just in the last few days:

• But you said it was rained out...: Monday night's game against the Red Sox was delayed due to the weather, but some fans claim Yankee employees told them it was rained out. So they left. Unfortunately, the game continued and some of those fans were not let back into the stadium. Yelling and borderline chaos ensues at Gate 6: "We talked to the security personnel, who said there was zero chance they were going to play the game," said Tom Stuart, a 27-year-old from Astoria who waited out most of the rain delay before leaving with his girlfriend. "We spent three hours drinking beer - you can't drink much because they're 10 bucks apiece - now they're going to play a game in front of 35 fans.". [ NYDN]

• All A-Rod, All The Time: Pitch-tipping? Strippers? Steroids? Bitch Tits? What say you Joe Girardi:" I have some issues with it, that it's interesting how the book date got moved up now," Girardi said, "and I get tired of answering these questions. I don't understand why someone would write a book like this anyway, and some people may not care to hear that but I don't understand." [ AP]

• Even Paul O'Neill is getting hassled: Perhaps the Yankees are trying to regain control of the PR nightmare 2009 has been so far, they're getting a little more strict with the media coverage and sticking to their rule book. According to Bob Raisman of the NYDN, Yankees security asked former Yankee "warrior" O'Neill to not "loiter" around the batting cages. Also? His wife wasn't allowed into the Stadium's "wives room" because she was told it was for "current wives only." [ NYDN]

• At least they're beating the Red Sox...: Not at all. 0-5 so far, two straight losses at home. But Johnny Damon is still optimistic!: "Because we are 0-5, it's going to make us a better team, a tougher team, a team that's more together," he said, "a team that's going to rally behind our players." Yes! [ NYP]

• When all else fails, just do a flying kick: This is just amazing. I can say for a fact that I will never, ever be in a situation where my brain says, "You're gonna take that from that guy? Leap over four rows and try to drop-kick that loudmouth..." Hopefully not. [ Total Pro Sports]

And it's still on the beginning of May.