Tiger Woods And Elin Have Finally Divorced

The Tiger Woods typing robot finally reappeared on his personal site and formally issued a statement about the death of the marriage that gave the world two bouncing baby Swedecaublasians. Dogs Chasing Cars has the details.

This is what Tiger's robot said:

We are sad that our marriage is over and we wish each other the very best for the future. While we are no longer married, we are the parents of two wonderful children and their happiness has been, and will always be, of paramount importance to both of us. Once we came to the decision that our marriage was at an end, the primary focus of our amicable discussions has been to ensure their future well-being. The weeks and months ahead will not be easy for them as we adjust to a new family situation, which is why our privacy must be a principal concern.