Tim Tebow Named Most Eligible Christian Bachelor

We were cruising dating site Christian Partner For Life the other day, looking for a nice girl who does that hot thing where they wear a cross in their cleavage, and we stumbled across a singular honor for one Timothy Tebow.

The site named Tebow their Single Christian of the Year, easily beating off other noteworthies His Holiness Benedict XVI and Lindsay Lohan. And why not?

Tim Tebow provides a great example for how a single, committed Christian should live their lives. Tebow is a virgin and is saving himself for marriage. He stays humble and modest in the face of massive scrutiny and press coverage.

I doubt Jesus himself could have remained so meek with Ed Werder in his face all the time.

The site “wishes Tebow the very best in finding a Christian wife in the future,” as do we. The “virgin ‘til marriage” thing doesn’t preclude extramarital road beef, as far as our scriptural experts have been able to ascertain.

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