What to watch as your paperboy looks at you from outside, weeping softly ...

• College football: Alabama at Birmingham at Southern Methodist. We could have saved endless space by calling this UAB vs. SMU. [ESPN2]
• NBA: Chicago at Miami; Phoenix at L.A. Lakers. Overture, curtain, lights, this is it — the night of nights. No more rehearsing and nursing a part. We know every part by hearrrrrt ... [TNT]
• NHL: San Jose at Florida. Nothing says cold, winter sports like sharks and panthers. [Versus]