Train Station Invaded By Substance That Probably Came From Aliens

The picture above, via ABC 7's Ben Bradley, depicts some shit currently going down at Union Station in Chicago.
According to Bradely, that mysterious black substance began leaking from the roof, and nobody is quite sure what it is.
Now, you might be sitting there thinking, "Ah, what's the big deal? It's probably just poop water!" Oh really, guy? What the hell kind of poop water is solid goddamn black like that? Not any poop water I've ever seen!
You know what is solid goddamn black like that, though? The black oil from The X-Files. That's probably what this is. We've probably lost Chicago.


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