Zlatan Kills Denmark On The Field, Then Torches Them With Sick Burn

This version of Zlatan Ibrahimović is older and worse than the one we loved and feared. Not that a little thing like age could keep him from stomping out Denmark on his way to qualifying for Euro 2016, and dancing over the body in an interview after.

Today’s Sweden-Denmark game was the second leg of their Euro 2016 playoff. Sweden came in with a comfortable 2-1 lead, but needed to keep the pressure on to ensure, unlike their last playoff failure that kept them out of the 2014 World Cup, they didn’t let their star player miss out on yet another major international tournament. Zlatan took matters into his own hands:

After scoring a brace to put his team 2-0 up today, 4-1 on aggregate (Denmark got two goals late but needed at least a 4-2 scoreline today to advance), Zlatan had this to say to the haters: “They said I should retire, but I sent their whole country into retirement.”

The context here being that before the tie, Ibra intimated that he might retire from international play after Euro 2016, which meant his final match for his country could’ve been today. Instead Zlatan came, he saw, and he Zlatan’d. This man will never die.