leitch-old Page 501 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
About Last Night ...
What you missed while hopelessly entangled in the volleyball net ... Suns unnecessarily extend tedium. Frank Thomas returns from DL, sparking White Sox to ... no wait, he's hurt again. Men attack each other with large sticks for two hours. No one is arrested.—Rick Chandler...
To Watch Tonight ...
What To Watch While Searching For Your Pants ... Red Sox at Yankees: I'll have two beers, please ... one for drinkin', and one for throwin'. Gentlemen, start your Fandango. Unnecessary remake of Burt Reynolds classic The Longest Yard opens at a theater near you. Senior PGA Championship. Come watch t...
Leftovers: Soccer Hooligans On The Street
Liverpool soccer fans celebrate championship by drinking, dancing in streets. Or, as they otherwise call it — Friday. [A href="http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/sport/football/story.jsp?story=641788">Belfast Telegraph] Hey Kellen Winslow, you know that $3 million we gave you? We need it back. [The D...
Whither David Aldridge?
An excellent post on SportsFrog.com brought up something we hadn't thought about in a while: Whatever did happen to David Aldridge? We know everyone was pretty pissed at him for that whole Celtics trade thing, but he was essentially banished for The Screamer That Is Stephen A. Smith. He supposedly...
Another Non-Descript Gay "Comes Out"
OK, we'll be honest: We're getting tired of gay athletes. What, you ask? You didn't know of any gay athletes? Well, the only gay athletes that exist, apparently, are those who play obscure sports at tiny universities. (The most only thing wrong with gay athletes is how they inspire every journalis...
He Would Have Scored Higher, But He Kept Losing His Pen
Fantastic tidbit from FootballOutsiders.com's "Four Downs" column, in the section about the New York Giants:...
Rickey Does What Rickey Does, Baby
Surprising no one, Rickey Henderson rocked in his San Diego Surf Dawgs debut last night. We honestly would lose our collective minds if Rickey made it back to the bigs; we think we would just follow him around, like Phish or the Grateful Dead or REO Speedwagon....
Today in MLB Blogs
Today's MLB Blogs home page is actually sort of jarring. It features a rouge's gallery of mugs of club broadcasters, all demanding that you join their mother site. It kind of reminds us of the final scene from Return of the Jedi — spectral images of heroes from the past, standing together and smili...
Without Updates, Bonds Falls Back On Baby Pictures
Well, we suppose it's better than showing Barry in a hospital smock....
Tell Us Where On The Doll The Coach Touched Himself
From the Motivational Speaker File: Miami high school baseball coach Lazer Callazo resigned yesterday after a curious attempt to pump up his team. To quote The Miami Herald:...
Kwan Excited About Choking Again
We don't pay much attention to figure skating — obviously — but we have always been amused and befuddled by the intense popularity of Michelle Kwan. (We once knew a grown woman who had pictures of her all over her wall. She was a sensitive sort.) Yesterday, Kwan announced that she will participate...
How To Give College SIDs Something To Do Over The Summer
As former sports editors of our college papers, we can assure you: There is no more loathsome creature than the college sports information director. Secure that what they're doing is important, believing they're really a part of the team, they wield their small-town "power" as if they truly hold the...
The Only Way To Get Americans To Care About Soccer
They've tried starting a professional league. They've tried forcing mothers into drive vans back and forth between games. They've even tried having women take off their shirts when they score. And nothing has worked: Americans have better things to do that get into soccer. But Premier League team ...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while your house was being trashed by that annoying Cat in the Hat... Alex Rodriguez hits 17th homer. Rest of American League enters therapy. Justin Leonard climbs to top of St. Jude leaderboard, threatens to jump. Ryan Newman's record lap wins Coca-Cola 600 pole. Did that sentence m...
Jamal Lewis Soon To Be Nobody's Bitch
We are but a week away from Jamal Lewis' freedom. On June 2, the Ravens running back will finish his four-month prison sentence for drug trafficking. Apparently he's been doing fine during incarcertion, working in the prison toolshed and checking out library books. (Right.) How will Jamal adjust t...
To Watch Tonight ...
Elvis once shot his TV for less than this ... Tigers at Yankees. It's Alex Rodriguez Therapy Night; the first 5,000 therapists who have treated A-Rod get a free foam No. 1 finger. FedEx St. Jude PGA Classic, Round 1. Come play in a tournament named for the patron saint of impossible causes. French O...
Rickey Henderson: The Last Refuge Of The Tortured Cubs Fan
Things are getting so bad on the North Side of Chicago that Cubs bloggers are pleading for them to sign Big Bad Rickey....
Leftovers: NFL Lowers Horsepower
NFL bans horse-collar tackle, in the most dramatic rule change in league since the actual ban of horses. [Football Outsiders] Roddick ousted from Open as the last American left in France is kicked out. [Tennis-x.com] Rickey Henderson, 46, makes his Surf Dawg debut. Long Beach Armada to counter with ...
Please Take Soccer Team. I Am Romanian. I Am Hungry.
There once was a man in Romania named Dinel Staicu. (That's him in the photo. We think. We don't speak Romanian.) Dinel had many big dreams; the biggest dream he had was owning a soccer team. (There they call it "football," for some stupid reason.) He bought a team called Universitatea Craiova, an...
Tom Seaver Discovers Fire
Join Us! Still not sure if you want to pay MLB Blogs.com $4.95 per month for the privilege of blogging about baseball on their site? (Hint: you can do it just about anywhere else on the web for free). Well, check out today's latest MLB Blogs shill, Tom Seaver....