sean-newell Page 71 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Biogenesis Suspensions Likely Coming This Week
According to a report in the New York Post, Major League Baseball plans on announcing the remainder of the Biogenesis-related suspensions this week. That includes Alex Rodriguez and more than 15 other players. It looks like those 15-plus other guys will all get 50-game suspensions in much the same w...
David Ortiz Destroys Dugout Phone Because Tim Timmons Blew A Call
David Ortiz was halfway to first base before Tim Timmons called strike one on what was as clear a ball four as an umpire can observe. He tossed his bat back to the dugout and everything. In calling the 3-0 pitch a strike, Timmons set in motion a series of events ending with David Ortiz taking his ba...
Alex Rodriguez Is A Walking Disaster
Alex Rodriguez can't do a single thing right. He appears to be physically incapable of doing anything without making it exponentially worse. If there is such a thing as the Midas touch, A-Rod is there to restore balance to the universe. Wednesday afternoon, Alex Rodriguez had another doctor—an ortho...
I Can't Stop Looking At This Picture Of Tyson Chandler's Tiny-Ass Legs
Look at those gams! How does he not fall over? ...
Reporter Draws Marvelous Unintentional Dong
It's been a while since we checked in on the world of unintentional dongs, but this is worth checking in on. Anatomically speaking, WJRT-TV reporter Siobhan Riley's unfortunate diagramming of local construction is a very faithful representation of a dong....
Eric Wedge Released From Hospital After “Very Mild Stroke”
Seattle manager Eric Wedge was hospitalized before Monday's series opener against his former team, the Cleveland Indians, due to light-headedness he experienced during batting practice. Wedge was released today and is expected to make a full recovery from what doctors believe was a "very mild stroke...
J.J. Redick Responds To Abortion-Contract Reports
J.J. Redick just fired off a few tweets in response to earlier reports that he and former acquaintance Vanessa Lopez entered into a contract concerning certain details regarding Ms. Lopez's impending abortion. Redick's response was emphatic and technical....
Dennis Rodman Had Himself A Good Time At This Fashion Show
Dennis Rodman went to a fashion show in Miami on Monday night, sat in the first row and enjoyed the shit out of himself....
Sheriff: Officer Should Not Have Arrested Antonio Morrison
Florida linebacker Antonio Morrison was arrested late Saturday evening on charges related to barking at a dog. Today, Alachua County Sheriff Sadie Darnell said the arresting officer should have just issued Morrison a warning....
Jason Heyward Makes Diving Catch To Save Game Against Mets
With two outs and two men on base in the bottom of the ninth of a 2-1 game, Mets pinch hitter Justin Turner hit a tailing line drive to left-center. By the time the ball makes its way into the outfield, Andrew Brown is rounding third and Omar Quintanilla is already at second. If Heyward—who began t...
Ryan Braun Does Not Owe The Sample Collector An Apology
Ryan Braun was suspended for the remainder of the season for his role in the Biogenesis fiasco. The knives are finally out and The League Of Baseball Justice is all set to carve Braun up for...besmirching the name of the sample collector at the center of his 2012 appeal. Zuh?...
UNC Keeps Digging Deeper Hole For Itself In Academic Scandal
The UNC academic scandal—that's much less scandal and much more conversation with the last person left in the world to have seen the ending of The Sixth Sense—continues. To recap, athletes at UNC were enrolled in bogus classes and received assistance from faculty and administrators to help maintain ...
Young Boston Red Sox Fan Is A Dirty Liar
Boston is home to a generally amoral and disgusting fanbase on the whole but this...this goes beyond the pale....
Proof That The Jets Are Evolving
Before there was Mark Sanchez and his buttfumble there was Browning Nagle and his incredible-disappearing-football-oh-just-kidding-it's-a-Sam-Mills-76-yard-fumble-return. ...
If <i>Inception</i> Is Possible, I Need It
This week, I'm quite certain you'll soon learn, I probably had a stroke from all the heat. Which I think is different from heat stroke, but what do I know? I'm not a doctor. I'm just a guy trying to make it in this crazy, mixed up runner's world. Here's a Spotify list for you. Please feel free to qu...
Ernie Banks Joined Pearl Jam On Stage At Wrigley
Pearl Jam played a rain-delayed show at Wrigley Field Friday night and before Eddie Vedder began singing the Cubs tribute song "All The Way," he introduced Ernie Banks, to the delight of the Chicago crowd....
Ceremonial Skydiver Crashes Into Baseball Player
The music kills me. It really adds to the scene as anticipation mounts. ...