Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise
Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise

Hoot, There It Is

Illustration for article titled Hoot, There It Is

Look, you may say this has nothing to do with sports, but we don't care. Sometimes a story transcends compartmentalization ... You do not come into the owl's house talkin' trash!

A scantily clad, 32-year-old man was found dead early Monday in a pool of blood in an owl cage at the Moscow Zoo. A bird keeper at the zoo found the man, Alexander Luparev at about 10 a.m., lying in the cage, which is home to a Siberina long-tailed tawny owl.

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Sure, Billy Packer claims it was all inadvertent, as one might guess. But we're skeptical. Consider this evidence from the story in the Moscow Times:

• Luparev's clothes were strewn across the concrete base of the cage. Also found were his documents, an undisclosed amount of money, and a half-empty, one-liter bottle of vodka.

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• At this point, no one quite knows what happened. Luparev apparently hit his head on the ground — possibly following an altercation with the owl — and fell unconscious.

• "The owl is still in a state of shock," zoo spokeswoman Natalya Istratova said Wednesday.

• Luparev is believed to have been drunk.

Why do we have the feeling that it was probably this guy?

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Man Found Dead, Naked Inside Owl Cage [Moscow Times]

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