Johnny Boychuk's Austrian Team Only Gave Him Red Bull To Drink

As NHL players return to North America—those who aren't claiming asylum to escape the Islanders regime, anyway—they're being set upon by their neglected beat writers, and sharing some strange stories of their sabbaticals. Alex Picard made some new friends in the shower. Ryan Jones was handcuffed and detained at the border.

But our favorite comes from Bruins defenseman Johnny Boychuk, who was playing for EC Red Bull Salzburg in the Austrian league. Salzburg is sponsored by, yes, energy drink company Red Bull. And according to CSN New England's Joe Haggerty, that sponsorship extended to the tiniest detail.

This seems incredibly dangerous. Sugary and caffeinated drinks may not kill you outright, but they're probably not the best thing for a sweaty, tired athlete. Hydration is key, and unless Boychuk was smuggling in bladders of water taped to his body, I'm not sure he could have survived a full season in Salzburg.