Locker Page 589 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Fancy Toothpicks Are My Cleanest Vice
The summer I was nine, I learned how to brush my teeth with a twig. My grandpa handed me a small piece broken off what’s called a neem tree, and told me to chew on it. I was hit by a very vegetal bitterness, the kind that puckers your mouth by sheer force of personality, crowding out all the other f...

How To Housetrain Your New Puppy
Like anyone who grew up with family pets, wore out VHS tapes of Homeward Bound, and suddenly found themselves in very dusty rooms when Vincent faithfully laid down next to Jack during the finale of LOST, I love dogs. That said, I felt no particular urgency to get one of my own until recently—I knew ...

These Babies Blew It
The Sacramento Kings treated fans to a baby race during halftime of yesterday’s game, and oh man did those babies shame themselves....

Drink Up Fuckers
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¡Qué Golazo!
Quincy Amarikwa put San Jose up 2-0 on Portland tonight in MLS action with a magnificent 40-yard strike that left Timbers keeper Adam Kwarasey looking like an absolute buffoon. ¡Qué golazo!...

Deadspin Up All Night: You And Your Friends Should Leave
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Report: Clippers Rookie Branden Dawson Arrested For Domestic Violence
Los Angeles Clippers rookie Branden Dawson was arrested around 8:30 Pacific Time this morning in Playa Vista, Ca. and charged with felony domestic violence, per a report from TMZ Sports. The former Michigan State star was released from LAPD custody after posting his $50,000 bail a few hours later, a...

Dead Letters: Steph Curry Is A "Garbage Human Being" Edition
This morning, we brought you Steph Curry’s turnaround thunderbolt against the Phoenix Suns. It was a great shot, but according to this reader who emailed me 20 minutes after our article was published, it was actually extremely problematic and we should stop covering him. Also, I am like 90 percent s...

VCU Cheerleader Takes Out Her Rage At Losing On Some Defenseless Balloons
Sometimes when you lose, you shoot sad videos of your dog coming over and giving you a kiss, and sometimes you just want to smash some balloons....

OOF
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Steph Curry Running Away Before His Threes Go In Is Rude, Wonderful, And Demoralizing
Last night’s Warriors-Suns game was silly with highlights, even by Golden State’s inflated standards; Brandon Knight hit five audacious three pointers in the third quarter to give the Suns a double digit lead; Mo Speights went all Dirk and kept his squad in the game during that run; Leandro Barbosa ...

Cal State-Bakersfield Wins First NCAA Tourney Bid With Last-Second Stunner
Dedrick Basile’s last-second three-pointer gave the Cal State-Bakersfield Roadrunners a 57-54 win over NMSU and punched that school’s first ticket to the NCAA tournament since joining Division I nine years ago....

Monta Ellis Called Out The Mavericks Last-Chance Out-Of-Bounds Play Before They Even Ran It
Monta Ellis took his Pacers (who are kind of on a bit of roll here) down to Dallas where they beat the Mavericks (who are scuffling at the bottom of the Western Conference playoff picture) 112-105. When Dallas had the ball down six with 17 seconds left, Monta Ellis was in charge of keeping an eye on...

Deadspin Up All Night: You'll Pass This On, Won't You?
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The Grizzlies Are Lance Stephenson's Right Now, And That's Entertaining As Hell
You know how Marc Gasol broke his foot, Mario Chalmers tore his Achilles, Zach Randolph’s knee ain’t happy, Brandan Wright has a messed up MCL, and all the Grizzlies had was Mike Conley and some randos? Well:...

What's Wrong With The Oklahoma City Thunder?
After the Thunder collapsed and let the Minnesota Timberwolves come back and beat them in Oklahoma City last night, Kevin Durant took the blame and wore the hairshirt. Even if it’s just KD self-flagellating, this quote sums up the sadness of OKC’s last month pretty succinctly:...

Diego Costa Sent Off After Getting Intimate With Gareth Barry (And Maybe Biting Him)
Everton downed Chelsea 2-0 in FA Cup action today, though the real excitement came in the final minutes as Diego Costa earned a red card for intruding on Gareth Barry’s personal space; Barry himself would be sent off minutes later, but let’s not miss the glory of Costa either kissing Barry, trying t...

Love Is Real: Donald Sterling And His Wife Are Calling Off Their Divorce
In August, lawsuit-loving former Clippers owner Donald Sterling filed for divorce from his wife Shelly, who he called a “pig” during court proceedings when they were fighting over who would retain control of the Clippers (as it turns out, the eventual answer to that one was neither, thank God)....

Buddy Hield Buzzer-Beater Heroics Overturned On Video Replay
West Virginia defeated Oklahoma in tonight’s Big 12 semifinal after player of the year candidate Buddy Hield’s half-court buzzer-beater attempt was judged on video review to have failed to beat the buzzer....

Donald Trump Praises Missouri's Football Teams In Bizarre Speech
In the past twelve months, the state of Missouri has watched its NFL team depart for Los Angeles while its lone Division I-FBS team nearly went on strike due to racism on campus; they went 5-7 on the season. The two FCS programs? Missouri State’s football team went 1-10, while SEMO went 4-7. Donald ...