Locker Page 706 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Here's Our Favorite New Low-Alcohol Beer
Earlier this week, an employee of Colorado’s Caution Brewing Company threw his job to the wind via an angry and profane letter to Evil Twin Brewing in which he chastised the Brooklyn-based contract brewer for their high prices. Evil Twin posted the letter on their Facebook page, prompting Caution’s ...

How To Rob A Bank, As Told By An Actual Bank Robber
Clay Tumey is a retired bank robber who claims he robbed so many he lost count. He plied his trade about a decade ago, served four years in prison, and is now a free man, out of the game and touting his tale of redemption. He’s doing a Reddit AMA today, and it sort of makes bank robbery sound easy. ...

RIP Ornette Coleman, Who Confounded Most People And Humbled Us All
“There is a law in what I’m playing, but that law is a law that when you get tired of it, you can change it.” So said incomparable musical innovator Ornette Coleman, who died this morning at the age of 85, and while his career was full of these kinds of delightfully cryptic remarks, few unpack his s...

Ump Jordan Baker Executes MMA Takedown On Matt Kemp
Umpire and weirdo Jordan Baker defused a brewing Padres-Braves brawl with his best attempt at a double underhook throw on San Diego’s Matt Kemp, who was attempting to go after Julio Teheran following a hit by pitch in the first inning today in Atlanta....

The Sling I Wear On My Mangled Arm Smells Like Ass, Please Help
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She’ll be here every week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check the Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her....

<i>Me And Earl And The Dying Girl </i>Is Too Precious To Be Truly Great
The biggest obstacle toward liking Me and Earl and the Dying Girl is, well, basically everything about it. From its title on, this Sundance award-winner comes draped in preciousness and ironic remove, like a teen practically begging you to steal his lunch money while rolling his eyes and making some...

NRL Star Unleashes Bloodcurdling Scream After Arm Broken On Live TV
Ben Ross made his name in Australia’s NRL as one of rugby league’s toughest dudes. That makes watching his arm get snapped in half during an arm wrestling match Thursday night—broadcast live Down Under on Nine Network....

76ers To Wells Fargo: Give Us Money, Or We Won't Use Your Dumb Name
In an interesting bit of corporate jiu jitsu, the Philadelphia 76ers will cease referring to their home arena as the “Wells Fargo Center”—its corporate-sponsored name—reports the Associated Press. Instead, the 76ers will refer to it as “The Center” or their “home arena,” seemingly in retaliation aft...

Deadspin Up All Night: If There's No Music There
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Catch some sun while it’s out....

Audio: Kids Bombard Davidson With Messages For Steph Curry
During Steph Curry’s journey to the Finals, his alma mater’s been getting calls from kids wanting things: Shoes, visits, even contact information for Curry’s agent for NBA tryouts. Davidson men’s basketball SID Joey Beeler said he got over 40 calls in two days this week. (Beeler had to change his nu...

A Fantastic One-Hop IPA, No Matter Who Actually Brewed It
Remember how disappointing it was to realize celebrity chefs rarely cook much of anything, and certainly never touch your insignificant speck of a dinner, even if their name is on the sign out front? It took me a long time to accept that just as Santa Claus can’t fly Legos to all the world’s decent ...

Draymond Green Is Killing The Warriors
After the Warriors seared the exhausted Cavaliers in overtime of Game 1, our own Kevin Draper wrote a smart piece about how Draymond Green’s versatility enables Golden State to use him as the center in a terrifyingly fast and rangy small-ball lineup. “When the Warriors play small they’re unstoppable...

<i>Jurassic World </i>Features Cooler Dinosaurs And Way Stupider People
1. Here’s the only real question you need to ask yourself about Jurassic World: Does it bother you that such a theme park could never actually exist? I mean, obviously it could never exist: It has dinosaurs, for one thing. But more to the point, can you accept the fact that no rational human being w...

Warriors Fan Calls LeBron A "Pussy-Ass Bitch," Quickly Regrets It
If the Cavaliers win in five games, it’s at least partially the fault of this Warriors fan for calling LeBron James a “pussy-ass bitch” after Game 2....

We Are All Escape Artists: What Night Is Like In Prison
Each of the approximately 3,740 days I spent incarcerated in the prisons of New York State was divided into three shifts. The changeovers were marked by counts; the number of convicts in a prison has to agree with the central office’s official tally. The outgoing crew spends the final moments of its...

Bug-Proof Your Home Like A Pro
Imagine a future without bugs! Sure, some learned ecologist will probably claim that these eerie tentacled creatures potter around at the bottom of the ecosystem doing important work in the grand scheme of things, but a wholesale elimination of the cockroaches and the mosquitos and the bed bugs of t...

Pallas's Cats Are Charming, Puffy Maniacs
Pallas’s cats, also known as manuls, are ridiculous creatures with amazing facial expressions. I love them so much. I don’t care that I’m extremely late to the party....

The Cavs' Injuries Are The Best Thing That Could Have Happened To Them
You will find no postgame quotes from unlikely finals hero Matthew Dellavedova. Rather than making it to the interview room for his scheduled podium appearance, Dellavedova received an IV the locker room, walked out to the parking garage, hopped on a stretcher and was loaded into an ambulance and ta...

The Cavaliers Defense Is A Vise, Slowly Crushing The Warriors To Death
Okay, what the hell are the Cavaliers doing on defense? Because after three games of absolutely pummeling the Warriors offense, this clearly isn’t a fluke. Here is a partial list of things the Cavs defense perpetrated on Golden State in Game 3:...

Gawk At NBA Finals Highlights Slow-Motion Phantom Videos
Above, see Timofey Mozgov, who is strongest man in NBA, block Draymond Green into the D-League at 120 frames per second. As a public service reminder, the NBA makes a load of these for every game, uploaded while the games are being played. ...