Our Only Regret Is That Gary Sheffield Does Not Have A Blog

This just in: Joe Torre is still a racist. He also hates puppies, and Flight of the Conchords. Let's get him! Such would be the cry if Gary Sheffield ran baseball.

On Thursday Sheffield took some more swings at the Yankees manager, comparing him to Jim Leyland, and possibly Mussolini. Let's look in on the fun: "(Leyland is) real. That's all there is to it. You get it both ways — the positive and the negative — and he's real about both sides. I don't have to clear up nothing. I meant what I said, said what I meant — and I stand by it. Like I said before, you can do whatever you want with my words, I don't really care. If I lose friends, so what. I don't need friends. I've got plenty of friends. I don't really take myself too seriously. Whatever comes my way I just react." Torre responded: "It's all going to go back to the comments. I don't want to go there." Asked if he might talk to Sheffield if he had a chance, Torre said: "Probably not." Sheffield was 0-3 with two walks on Thursday as Carlos Guillen did all of the heavy lifting in the Tigers' 8-5 win over New York. Guillen's grand slam in the first, off of Mike Mussina, set the tone, and Ivan Rodriguez also homered as the Yankees took their third straight loss after winning nine of 10.

• The Hunt For Red October. Let's get this party started, uh huh ... The Cardinals are just 2 1/2 games back in the Central after beating the first-place Brewers 8-0 on Thursday, and to prove that they are truly in contention, Yadier Molina is now a power hitter. Molina's two home runs (!!) led St. Louis, which swept the three-game series, outscoring Milwaukee 28-7. (Chicago, which beat the Reds 12-4, is a half-game out). Adam Wainwright allowed two hits over seven innings.

• Raising Arizona. Don't look now, but the Diamondbacks have won eight straight series; including 19 of their past 24 games after a 6-1 win over Florida. They're now three games up on the second-place Padres in the West.

• The Thrillies. OK, if you don't beat the Nationals when your ace is pitching, you need to pack it in. But the Phillies don't need to pack; Cole Hamels got his 14th win in a 4-2 triumph. And so Philadelphia ascends into second place in the East, a half-game ahead of Atlanta (9-3 loss to the Giants) and three behind Mr. Met (10-7 loss to the Pirates)

• Los Angeles 4, Toronto 3. What? The Angels won at Rogers Centre? Must be some sort of paperwork mixup.