a Page 7311 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Portland Man Running For Mayor, Punching Pick-Up Basketball Opponents In The Balls
I should clear something up. Democrat Jefferson Smith (pictured, right)* has denied punching any pick-up basketball opponent in the balls. His opponent yelled "You just punched me in the balls!" and Smith replied "I punched you in the thigh, not the balls." So, in the interest of fair and balanced c...

Roger Federer And Andy Murray Head Into Third Set Tied At One Set Apiece
There are some amazing shots flying back and forth between these two. Does Federer have another Major in him? Will Murray finally make the brits smile at Wimbeldon? Let's yak about it....

MLB Umpires Reverse Blown Call, World Does Not Collapse On Itself
For about 5 seconds last night, the bottom of the seventh in the Indians-Rays game was over. Tampa Bay was trotting into the dugout after getting the benefit of a blown call on a bobbled ball at first by Carlos Pena. Then something crazy happened....

Baseball Writers Of America: "It's Hot"
A little advice to aspring sports writers: if it's hot at the baseball game you're covering, mention it in the lead. No matter what—even if the heat affected both teams equally, or not at all—don't let three paragraphs go by without pointing out how hot it was. You were there. It was hot. The people...

Canada Beats United States In Football, Local Weekend Guy Defensively Sneers At Canada
Oooh Canada, you think you're so big and tough with your two straight victories over American, likely Division-I recruit high school players, don't you? Well guess what? You're still from Canada and say "eh" all the time, so stuff it. When did you guys have time to learn football between all the ic...
![Ford C. Frick Award-Winner Tim McCarver Mocked A Cancer Charity During Tonight's Broadcast [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Ford C. Frick Award-Winner Tim McCarver Mocked A Cancer Charity During Tonight's Broadcast [UPDATE]
Locks Of Love is a charity that makes wigs out of donated hair for children who have lost theirs due to cancer treatments or other medical reasons. Most people are familiar with Locks Of Love, for whom well-known hirsute people often go shorn in the name of charity and good faith....

Deadspin Up All Night: Keep On Laughing
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Get nuts tonight, huh?...

Cherry-Pit Spitting Contest Makes For Great Copy
This is a great article for a sweaty Saturday evening. It's short, sweet and absolutely absurd. Let's start with the headline:...

Chicago Paper: Cubs Not A Total Train Wreck, Like That Actual Train Wreck On The Front Page
The Cubs have been a mess for a while, so expectations have been a bit...lowered, let's say. To that end, the Daily Herald decided to take a page from Theo Epstein's "parallel-track" outlook for remaining competitive (woops!) in 2012 while also building for the future and run with it for a "mid-sea...

Adrian Peterson Reportedly Shoved Off-Duty Cop Working Security At Night Club
According to TMZ, Kase Smith, public information officer for the Houston police department, claims Peterson shoved an off-duty cop who was working as a bouncer in the club he visited last night. The officer/bouncer reportedly told Peterson it was time to leave and Peterson apparently ignored the in...

Associated Press: Oklahoma City Thunder Sign Brian Westbrook And The Guy From <em>27 Dresses</em>, Serge Ibaka Excited To Play Them In Olympics
Oklahoma City Thunder power forward Serge Ibaka will be playing for the Spanish national team at this year's summer Olympics. Today, the Associated Press published a relatively mundane story about Ibaka's belief that his Spanish team has the talent to compete with the U.S. team....

Annual Spain Is Full Of Drunk Psychotics Festival Begins Today
"Spain is different to anything I've experienced before,' said Michael Arraztoa, 25, from Bakersfield, California."...

You Won't Regret Reading About The Seven Best Bill Murray Stories
Bill Murray is an awesome dude, and he'll always have a special place in the hearts of sports fans for doing stuff like this, this, and this....
![Reports: Vikings RB Adrian Peterson Arrested, Charged With Resisting Arrest [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17s3q72lnjwbojpg.jpg)
Reports: Vikings RB Adrian Peterson Arrested, Charged With Resisting Arrest [UPDATE]
Details are still sketchy but according to the Houston Chronicle, Adrian Peterson may still be in a Houston jail (he's since been released on $1,000 bond) in connection with resisting arrest charges....

Carl Crawford Called Racial Slur, <i>Boston Globe</i> Quotes Urban Dictionary
Carl Crawford suffered a "a mild left groin strain" hustling for a triple during a minor league rehab game. He will resume his rehab stint after at least five days. It's a bummer for Crawford and the Red Sox, but it may be a welcome respite as New England residents perpetuate stereotypes....

Watch Eric Gordon Slowly Back Away From Reporters While Giving World's Most Awkward Interview
Yesterday we told you about poor Eric Gordon's desperate quest to get out of New Orleans, despite the fact that the Hornets will almost certainly match the Phoenix Suns' four-year, $58 million offer sheet....

Padres Fan Gets Hit By Foul Ball Because Of Mark Zuckerberg
All Travis Decker wanted to do was let his friends know he was at a Padres game. Thanks to Mark Zuckerberg, Travis Decker can tell all his friends that he was at a Padres game. Also thanks to Mark Zuckerberg, Travis Decker can upload the picture of the giant welt he will surely have on his clavicle...

Reggie Jackson Once Hit Three Home Runs In One Game, Does Not Want Anyone In The Hall Of Fame
Sports Illustrated recently had a nice long piece on Reggie Jackson. We learn from Jackson that he is not cocky or attention seeking—in the same paragraph we learn that he told Phil Taylor to meet him at a "building he owns, where he keeps a fleet of vintage automobiles on the ground floor" and in t...

Freeh Investigation Report Said To Be "Tough On Paterno"
According to ESPN The Magazine's Don Van Natta, Jr., The Freeh report should be released as soon as next week. It is expected to be bad for Joe Paterno....

Was Kate Upton Drunk At Last Night's Tigers Game?
Michigan native and Sports Illustrated swimsuit model Kate Upton showed up at last night's Tigers-Royals bout at Comerica Park, partying in Justin Verlander's suite and launching a Twitterstorm....