a Page 7894 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Tony Romo Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Tony Romo, who won the weekend by not making a complete spectacle of himself. When no one notices you, you're probably doing your job right....

Al Michaels Would Like To Clear Something Up
I don't know if this was Al, a phlegmy Cris Collinsworth, or one very sick statistician, but who the hell hocked up a (presumably) gigantic loogie on air last night? Do they have spittoons in the booth? [Video via NBC]...

Making Out At The Game? Bring Your Own Cheering Section
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

The End Of The Celebration
I promise, this is the last bit of Yankee fan homerism I'll be posting for a while. But I doubt many of you will complain about this one....

Great Moments In Press/Coach Relations
A reporter got the pregame scoop that two UCF players would be inactive. Here's audio of coach George O'Leary throwing a big old hissy fit and trying to bar the reporter from his postgame press conference. [Orlando Sentinel]...

Sammy Sosa Would Like To Clear Up Some Things About His Skin
Sammy Sosa is not hoping to star in the White Chicks sequel. It is not some kind of alleged side affect from any alleged substances he allegedly may have put in his body. He just wants to be beautiful!...

Metrodome Memories Are A Little Pathetic
Since the Twins have a fancy new field, it was time to get rid of all the leftover stuff at the Metrodome. A phrase comes to mind: "And nothing of value was lost."...

Chelsea! Man U! Dental Hygiene!
A thrilling 1-0 game between the clubs atop the table is no reason for this Chelsea supporter to forget to brush his teeth mid-match. [Off The Post]...

Ochocinco Is Straight Cash
Why would a football player carry singles in their uniform pants? Heading to the strip club after the game? Buying off the refs? Or just throwing a little cheddar the Ravens' offense's way after having their way with them?...

Your Late Games Open Thread
No one disputes Dan Snyder's lack of football acumen, but John Riggins goes so far as to call him "a bad guy." While maybe not a war criminal, the Skins' season ought to be called the new Trail of Tears....

Nick Swisher Is A 12-Year-Old Fangirl
As the Yankees cleaned out their lockers, "Nick Swisher's teammate photo collage, snipped from Yankees gameday programs and newspaper back pages, remained affixed to his locker." [MLB.com]...

Ever Dream Of Shaq? You're Not Alone
In the grand tradition of experimental Dirk Nowitzki fiction, we bring you something we can't explain. Student art project? Ramblings of a madman? Signs of the impending Ashaqalypse? Check your sanity at the door....

San Diego Horndoggery Day Continues
Chris Chambers was released due to the Chargers concerns about his personal life: namely, some Fatal Attraction level stalking. He's got a restraining order out on his ex-girlfriend, after she sent "lurid" text messages to his wife. [SD Union-Tribune]...

SDSU AD Gets His Mack On, At School Expense
Jeff Schemmel is under fire for traveling for trysts with a married woman, while expensing the trips to San Diego State. That's gotta be some kind of recruiting violation....

Your Early Games Open Thread
It's Cardinals vs. Bears in the match-up of teams we try to talk ourselves into believing are good. But they're not. Meanwhile, thankfully, the Skins game has been confined to the Zaxby's region of the country. [The506]...

It's Just Like "Never Been Kissed," With More Statutory Rape
We've all wished at one point or another that we could relive our high school days. But when you pose as a high school student to get another crack at a basketball scholarship, try not to land an underage girlfriend....

Yankees Contribute To Corporate Malfeasance
The half-ton of recycled paper delivered to businesses in lower Manhattan wasn't enough, as some offices started chucking out sensitive financial documents. If the Yankees could have won last year, there would have been no need for a bailout. [WNYW]...

Jahvid Best In Surprisingly Good Shape (i.e. Alive, Moving)
Someone recently wrote (I can't for the life of me remember who) that there's nothing quite like the sound of an entire stadium sure they just watched someone die....

English Language 1, Washington Fans 0
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Everything You Need To Know About What It's Like To Do Color Analysis For Richmond Vs. Villanova
I'm sure when he says "bum" he means "hero" and when he says "end this fucking game" he means "what an exciting 4th quarter." [Bsmeddy You Tube]...