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The Metrodome Should Be Condemned
Last year, the Vikings replaced the turf at the Metrodome because the old stuff led to too many twisted ankles and torn ligaments. There was a whole to-do, and it went to court, and eventually they were allowed to bring in the new turf. It lasted all of one season....

Circle Me, Innuendo
Your morning roundup for July 20, the day we failed trying to tell Twins play-by-play man Dick Bremer we went to Staples High, too. H/T to Tim for the photo. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Kentucky Man Charged With Repeat Horse-Sex Offense
Nathan Johnson, 28, just can't suppress the urges inside him. Or maybe he was just bored in Paducah, Kentucky, a city of 25,000 near the Illinois border. The heat, oh, the heat. It can drive a man mad....

Former Phillies Reliever Ricky Bottalico Is Worried About Roy Oswalt's Bulging Dick
Crossing Broad brings us another highlight to add to the already lengthy reel of sports broadcasters talking about bulging dicks....

Tony Romo Will Be A Leader, As Soon As He's Finished Golfing
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: there is a time for football, and this is not it....

The Say Hey Id: Willie Mays Was A Reluctant Letter-Writer, But He Longed For Love
Here's one of Willie Mays's charming love letters to his then-girlfriend, former beauty queen Gladys Cofield. This would've been in the first half of the 1950s, though the exact date isn't clear. At the time, Mays was smitten with the former Jet covergirl and fawned over the pretty photographs she s...

Is Going Commando In Gym Shorts OK?
Before I get to the Funbag, just a quick reminder that I'll be at Comic Con on Saturday, doing the Immortality panel at 10AM in Room 7AB. You can buy a copy of "The Postmortal" a month early if you go. And you get to meet me! And then you get to ignore me when you realize that one of the dudes who w...

Frivolous Lawsuit Theater: Court Bitchslaps Wannabe Cheerleader
This is a story of how awful high school girls are, and how petty cheerleading politics can be, and how an overbearing stage mom get take this bullshit all the way to a federal appeals court. But mostly it's the story of how satisfying it can be to see justice done, with usually staid jurists writin...

Maybe Now The Dodgers Can Officially Add Bankruptcy To The Lineup
Your morning roundup for July 19, the day we learned to stay out of the way when Real Madrid rides around in a golf cart. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Mike Tyson's Pigeons "Have The Bloodlines Of Richard The Lionheart"
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Iron Mike loves his birdies....

Meat Loaf Was My Softball Coach
In 1991, I was a high school freshman in the small town of Redding, Conn. My brother was a senior, and his prom date was one of our neighbors down the street, a junior, Pearl Aday. Pearl would drive me home from softball practice when her father, our coach, was unable to. I preferred Pearl, as her d...

Close Reading: Did Grantland Rice Misquote Grantland Rice's Most Famous Quote?
Not long ago, the staff of ESPN's Grantland objected to a letter published by our Grantland Comments and Corrections Desk, which argued that the site's slogan misquoted Grantland Rice. After extensive research, Deadspin has concluded that Grantland's version of the slogan is valid. The irregularity ...

This Is What Can Happen When You Give An Umpire A Microphone
Your morning roundup for July 18, the day the NFL began castrating "circumcising mosquitoes." Got any photos or stories for us? Tip your editors....

Your USA-Japan World Cup Final Open Thread
USA lineup: Solo; Krieger, Rampone, Buehler, LePeilbet; O'Reilly, Boxx, Lloyd, Rapinoe; Wambach, Cheney. Let's go get it, girls....
![Jay Mariotti Some Dude Impersonating Jay Mariotti Says US Women's Team Was Unpopular, Unpretty In School [CORRECTION]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17pywshl5osm1jpg.jpg)
Jay Mariotti Some Dude Impersonating Jay Mariotti Says US Women's Team Was Unpopular, Unpretty In School [CORRECTION]
Your morning roundup for July 17, the day we welcomed back the best show on TV. See anything worthwhile? Tip your editors. Via Jay Mariotti's Facebook, h/t to Justin....

Stories That Don't Suck: SportsFeat's Guide To Hoops In A Foreign Land
Every week, SportsFeat picks a few great reads for Deadspin. Thanks to Yao Ming's retirement and Deron Williams's Turkish tour, here are some classics on the foreign wanderings of professional basketball players. Enjoy....

The NL Central Standings Look Like A Misprint, But Pittsburgh's Really In First
Your morning roundup for July 16, the day we wondered who was giving all thatmoney to Michele Bachmann. See anything worthwhile? Tip your editors....

Arian Foster Stays In Shape By Riding A Mechanical Bull While Jared From Subway Looks On
Houston Texans running back Arian Foster rode a mechanical bull for a Subway-promotion-cum-charity-thing on Thursday. Jared looked on, with some other dude, and perhaps no one else....

Dook Sisters Go To Court Over Who's Dookier
The daughter of a Duke alumnus has filed a lawsuit against her sister, her brother-in-law, and Duke University for her inherited right to sit among these fine young men and women at Cameron Indoor Stadium all season long. Katina Dorton is seeking damages for the "fraudulent transfer" of two season t...

Anyone Want A Life-Size Wall Decal Of Dan Gilbert's Bowtied Son?
Nick Gilbert, the breathing, five-foot talisman that charmed Cleveland to Kyrie Iring in May, wowed us with his snazzy enthusiasm at the lottery....