all Page 1988 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Last Night's Winner: The Phillies Fan Who Fell Down The Stairs
In sports everyone's a winner, some just win better than others. Like the poor guy in the blue shirt who ungracefully bought it during the 5th-inning of yesterday's Phillies-Twins game. He gets four gold stars, a blue ribbon and a platinum trophy....

Federer On Brink Of Bad Kind Of History
Roger Federer dropped his first two sets to something called Alejandro Falla, the 60th ranked player on the tour. Whether it's an epic upset, or an epic comeback, it's worth watching. (UPDATE: Federer won. Of course he did.) [Wimbledon, ESPN2]...

Don't Let Notre Dame Touch You There, Big Ten
So Lou Holtz finally wants Notre Dame in The Big 10. I never took him for a bandwagoner, but his assessment that the conferences are eventually going to split into a few mega-conferences isn't lacking for evidence....

Your Culturally Insensitive World Cup Goal Roundup For June 18
Yesterday was a fantastic day. The U.S. played in the most exciting — and controversial — game of the tournament, perhaps creating some new soccer junkies in the process....

Cockblocked By The Bassist’s Poop! GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase five heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Los Angelenos Search For Championship Trophy Under Burning Cars
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Your Culturally Insensitive World Cup Goal Roundup For June 17
Today offered a smorgasbord of goals. A hat trick by Gonzolo Higuain was the day's highlight, and the streets of France will be littered with the burned effigies of referees after a non-offside call led to Javier Hernandez's score....

John Wall Has Lucrative Endorsement Deal To Wear The Flag Of Greece On His Feet
Wall, the presumptive No. 1 pick and a freshly minted Reebok man, debuted his new shoes this morning to great hooting and derision from people who don't like their kicks to have been designed by the winner of a quilting competition. [SLAM]...

Utah Joins Pac-10; Spacetime Folds In On Itself
TERROR! SCHOOL IN AMERICAN SOUTHWEST THAT USED TO PLAY SPORTS AGAINST SMALL SCHOOLS IN WESTERN STATES WILL NOW PLAY SPORTS AGAINST LARGE SCHOOLS IN WESTERN STATES! [Salt Lake Tribune]...

A Terrifying Story Of Unwanted Barber Arm Humping
No time to waste. I got a bachelor party to get to. There's gonna be a grill! And weed! And smores! I'd fist a horse for a smore. Your letters:...

Last Night's Winner: Kansas City
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the good people of Kansas City, Mo., who received the 2012 MLB All-Star Game, for some reason. No clear reason, actually....

Texas A&M AD Challenges Alum To Fight, Alum Sadly Doesn't Accept
Bill Byrne, athletic director at Texas A&M, made an embarrassing gaffe this week when he revealed himself to be a terribly old man who doesn't understand email. He should know by now that all internet threats are empty threats....

Your Culturally Insensitive World Cup Goal Roundup For June 16
Day 6 saw a huge upset with the Swiss defeating Spain and Uruguay's Diego Forlan putting two away against an overmatched South Africa. Pretty goals, lucky goals — they're all here to be enhanced with some good old-fashioned cultural insensitivity....

Your Belated 2010 Hater’s Guide To World Cup
Like many of you, I'm largely indifferent to soccer most of the time. But one thing I'm never indifferent to is an opportunity to gleefully hate 31 lesser nations in the spirit of international competition....

Entire Canadian Football Team Suspended For Steroids
Nine University of Waterloo football players are suspected of possible steroid use, so the team's entire season has been canceled. (There may have been a smidgen of drug trafficking, too.) That's Canada, for you. Always so....reasonable. [OttawaCitizen]...

Your Culturally Insensitive World Cup Goal Roundup For June 15th
Lots of good ones today. The Brazilian goals were nonchalant and North Korea — the Bad Korea — scored on The Selection on a really nice play. Top honors must go to New Zealand's Winston Reid for his stoppage-time equalizer....

Tom Izzo: Spartan "For Life"
That sounds about right. Now ... exhale. [Lansing State Journal]...

Teagarden Affair Once Again Exposes All-Star Voters As A Bunch Of Morons
Here's your triannual reminder that sports fans are stupid, and should be protected from themselves: currently fourth in the voting for AL catcher is a player who has one measly hit on the season, and currently plays in Double-A....

The Legend Of Black Superman: Billy Ray Bates, Flying High In The Philippines
In the 1980s, Billy Ray Bates, dubbed "the Legend" by Brent Musberger, washed out of the NBA and onto the shores of the Philippines, where for a few wild years his legend grew, both on the court and in the bars....

USB-Charged Vibrators May Take Over The Universe
No time to waste. We go right to your letters....