art Page 216 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Report: FSU And Tallahassee Cops Obstructed Jameis Winston Investigation
Fox Sports has published a story about the handling of the sexual assault allegations against Jameis Winston; we'll surely be unpacking it all weekend. Citing thousands of pages of documents obtained through a series of public records requests, reporter Kevin Vaughan declares that both FSU administ...

Here's A 6-Foot-11 High School Quarterback
Logan Routt plays quarterback for Cameron High School (W.V.), and, oh yeah, he's 6-foot-11. That part's important....

Watch Jan Hooks And Phil Hartman In The Weird, Gorgeous <em>Love Is A Dream</em>
Jan Hooks, the fearlessly silly Saturday Night Live cast member and world-renowned Alamo tour guide, died today at 57 of a serious illness, reports TMZ. She was an integral part of late-'80s/early-'90s SNL; per the unanimously reverent Twitter chatter this evening, her best role might've been in the...

Sweet ESPN Martial Arts Broadcast A Throwback To Network's Early Days
If you're old enough to remember any of the 80's, you know that ESPN wasn't always the home to 24-hour jabbering analysts and NFL talk shows. In its more fledgling days, the WWL aired whatever content to which it could obtain rights; thus, Americans were introduced to wacky hat-wearing and fingerg...

The NHL Probably Shouldn't Hire Chris Pronger, Who's Still A Flyer
Chris Pronger hasn't played since 2011, but he remains under contract with the Flyers through 2017. That alone seems like enough to preclude Pronger taking a job in the league office. You'd think! ...

Struggling Brazilian Soccer Team Hires Weirdo Hypnotist
Walking barefoot on glass. Walking barefoot through hot coals. Bending iron poles with your neck. These are the things Olimar Tesser, Portuguesa's newly-hired team hypnotist, believes are the keys to dragging the Brazilian club out of the relegation zone....

It Took 36 Browns QBs 28 Seasons To Match Peyton Manning's 500 TDs
Peyton Manning reached 500 touchdown passes yesterday. Five hundred is an arbitrary number. (A nice, round number that enshrines him in the elite company of one, but arbitrary nonetheless.) How can you truly grasp the weight of an arbitrary number? Set it as the constant, and see how extreme the oth...

P.K. Subban, Tactical Farter
The Canadiens defenseman sat down for an interview on Quebec radio talk show Tout le Monde en Parle, and presumably said a whole bunch of interesting things. But forget that—here's what he said about farting on goalies:...

Bills Edge Imploding Lions With Field Goal; Jim Schwartz Carried Away
Lions kicker Alex Henery, who replaced previous Lions kicker Nate Freese roughly two weeks ago, will probably not be a Lions kicker for much longer. He missed all three of his field goal attempts today, keeping the game in reach. Kyle Orton and the Bills took advantage of that opportunity with 11 ...

Genius Bear Is Too Smart And Strong For Bullshit-Ass Electric-Deer Gag
Some scientist or whatever decided he wanted to hang an electrified deer carcass in the woods in order to see what would happen when a bear tried to eat the deer. Why did he do this? I don't know, man. Because he's a dickhead. But the good news is that this experiment was quickly and thoroughly torn...

Want Melissa Joan Hart To Follow You on Twitter? Commit To Alabama
Melissa Joan Hart, forever beloved to angsty '90s teens for Clarissa Explains It All, spent her weekend on Twitter following high school players who've committed to the Crimson Tide, AL.com reported today....

Pedro Martinez Kills Ned Yost On TBS Postgame Show
The Royals beat the A's in the AL wild card play-in game despite, not because of, manager Ned Yost. This didn't escape TBS analyst Pedro Martinez, who absolutely lambasted Yost's decision to relieve James Shields with fellow Dominican Yordano Ventura two days after Ventura threw 73 pitches. Martin...

Kevin Martin Isn't Actually Clueless, Knew Kevin Love Was Traded
For a minute there, it sure seemed like the Timberwolves's Kevin Martin was the most oblivious basketball player in the NBA. At Timberwolves media day yesterday, Martin told the assembled media that he had just learned that Kevin Love was traded to the Cavaliers. Via the Star Tribune: ...

TBS Baseball Crew Recreates "Boom Goes The Dynamite" Highlight Reel
To help ring in the playoffs, TBS had the crew from its studio baseball show do a new version of the famous "Boom Goes The Dynamite" highlight disaster. It's a pretty well-struck parody....

The Wizards Lead The NBA In <em>Street Fighter</em> Hairdos
You'll recall last week, when Washington Wizards center Marcin Gortat unveiled his hard-ass new mohawk 'do and transformed instantaneously from an affable Euro dude into a terrifying Death-Slav from hell. Well, it appears that Street Fighter-based coiffures are becoming A Thing on the Wizards: Ch...
![Model Strips Naked, Fights Cops At Aussie Rules Grand Final [NSFW]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/qv5rmf0hdny5sldmb2al.jpg)
Model Strips Naked, Fights Cops At Aussie Rules Grand Final [NSFW]
The lady you see above is a Scottish model named Heather McCartney. That's her being escorted out of Saturday's Australian Football League Grand Final, essentially the sport's Super Bowl. She was kicked out of the stadium because, while watching the game from a corporate box, she decided to get supe...

So Normal It Hurts: The Triumph And Tragedy Of Phil Hartman
There were few thrills in preadolescent life as dependable as the voice of Troy McClure. That first resoundingly confident "Hi!" triggered a Pavlovian response like no other single syllable: Here, without a doubt, comes a belly laugh....

Chris Sale Plunks Victor Martinez, Sparks Bench-Clearing Conversation
White Sox pitcher Chris Sale hit Victor Martinez in the sixth inning of today's game, causing both benches and bullpens to clear, though no one actually did anything. Why did Sale tag Martinez? The current best theory: Sale thought Martinez was stealing signs with the help of someone in the bullpen....

Brian Hartline Flagged For Golfing Touchdown Celebration
Dolphins receiver Brian Hartline's invisible putt after his touchdown was rather funny. The officials didn't appreciate his creativity, though, flagging the Dolphins for use of a non-football sport in a football game. (OK, it was actually for unsportsmanlike conduct.)...

Dead Men Do Tell Tales, Apparently
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