el Page 1777 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Anibal Sanchez's 17-K Game Trumped Even Randy Johnson's 1992 "Hammer From Hell" Game
If we can indulge in a brief moment of Welcome Back, Baseball — still early enough in the season, right? — it’s a joy to watch a sport that puts the ball in the hands of the defense. Virtually any other sport you care to name turns a defensive player into an offensive player as soon as he takes poss...
Messi Back To Scoring Ridiculous Goals, Bringing Ray Hudson To Orgasm
While Barcelona fell short of seizing La Liga today—they needed a win, and only got a draw, at Atletico Bilbao—it's hard to argue any viewer didn't get their money's worth when Lionel Messi danced amongst defenders in a demonstration of ball control that reminds anyone who might have forgotten that...
"I'm Coming To Kill You": OKC Ball Boy Not Happy With Westbrook Injury
When Russell Westbrook went down earlier this week with a potentially season-ending knee injury, basketball fans everywhere sighed loudly. Crazy, stupid and crazy-stupid people shouted at Patrick Beverley, the man who ran into Russell Westbrook's knee during the second quarter of Game 2 between the ...
Volleyball Player Takes Spike To The Face
You'll want to keep an eye on the sprightly player in blue, wearing number nine. Gotta love the "we'll get 'em next time, face" reaction, though....
Brian O'Nora Was Probably Puking Because He Swallowed His Chew
The Mets and Phillies experienced a brief delay in the first inning last night thanks to what is being variously described as Brian O'Nora's "flu like symptoms" or "illness." In all likelihood, however, the delay was probably due to Brian O'Nora vomiting up his chewing tabacco. ...
Rob Delaney Sang The National Anthem At Dodger Stadium Last Night
When Rob Delaney dies, the first line in his obituary will remind you that he was famous for being funny on Twitter. It may also reference his affinity for farts and hairy beavers. It will now also include "once sang the National Anthem at a Dodgers game." And it wasn't terrible. Yay!...
Runner Scores On Busted Squeeze Play By Falling Down
This new twist on the squeeze play comes our way from Texas high school baseball. Rather than waste time and energy running back to third after the batter whiffs on a bunt attempt, our guy just drops to the ground, lets the catcher run over him, and quickly pops back up for an unimpeded run home. ...
Good Morning! Here's A Michael Wilbon Stinkface
We hope this morning finds you bright and cheerful and ready to take on whatever exasperated-just-to-be-around-other-people Wilbon faces life throws at you....
Papa John Tells Us He Never Got Shitfaced At A Strip Club With Bonzi Wells While Wearing A Shawn Kemp Jersey
It's time for another firsthand account of Papa John getting shitfaced. If you haven't already, please check out our previous coverage of Papa John getting shitfaced. There was the time he got all fucked up at a basketball game, the time he allegedly proved himself to be a huge lightweight, and the ...
What's new today in the world of NFC North quarterbacks? Aaron Rodgers got a five-year, $110 million extension ($62.5 million of which arrives in the first three years) from the Packers. And Christian Ponder? Well, he's at Wal-Mart, salivating over Rodgers's dough and running errands for his wife....
Infographic: You're Better Off Guessing Than Listening To Mel Kiper
For most football fans, the NFL draft is associated with one name: Mel Kiper Jr. The ESPN analyst has been lauded as America's most famous draft expert for decades. We wondered how well his highly-publicized pre-draft rankings would hold up, though. Are the players Kiper claims will be NFL stars act...
Matt Barnes Has Ice Water In His Veins
They say the best way to survive a bear attack is to stare the beast down as it charges you. Maybe that's what Matt Barnes was thinking about last night when Zach Randolph came charging toward him after a hard foul. ...
Who Hugged The NFL Commissioner Longest At Last Night's Draft?
We don't know if, as a child, Roger Goodell dreamed of one day being best known for embracing enormous men and then, later, taking money from them. The Draft Day Hug Era is at its peak, and like last year, we decided to find out who hugged the NFL commissioner longest....
NFL Draft Prospect Tells Cop He Owns The Town; Cop Arrests Him
Today is "Tharold Simon Day" in Eunice, La., the hometown of former LSU cornerback Tharold Simon, who's expected to be picked in the middle rounds of this weekend's NFL draft. Simon apparently thought that made him above the law. A Eunice cop didn't quite see it that way....
Russell Westbrook Will Undergo Surgery For A Torn Meniscus
The Oklahoma City Thunder announced today that Russell Westbrook tore his meniscus in the second quarter of Game 2 against Houston on Wednesday and is out indefinitely. There's no timetable for his return yet, which potentially leaves the West wide open and sets up the Heat for an easy run to the ti...
The Goon Show
It'll come as no surprise that my favorite series at Grantland is the "Director's Cut" feature curated by Michael MacCambridge. He does a beautiful job and I'm always eager to see what gift he gives us next. Here's an especially good one—"The Making of a Goon," by Johnette Howard, which originally ...
At The NFL Draft, The Bills Take A Leap And Geno Smith Goes Home
It might've been the heaviest NFL draft ever. That's about the only superlative you can slap on last night....
How Will A Meniscus Tear Affect Russell Westbrook?
We learned today that Oklahoma City's Russell Westbrook will undergo surgery for a torn lateral meniscus in his right knee. This is great news for Western Conference hopefuls and bad news for anyone who loves basketball: We still don't know how long he'll be out, and the NBA playoffs without Westbro...
Taj Gibson Obliterated Kris Humphries
Oh Kris. Oh, oh Kris....