eli Page 155 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Bud Selig Can't Hear You: A Gallery
In honor of Commissioner for Life Bud Selig's new contract, we give you this metaphorically rich gallery, which we first ran in September 2010. ...

All The 3:16 Bible Verses, Ranked By How Likely They Are To Foretell Tim Tebow As The Messiah
Ryan Fitzpatrick, Matt Ryan, Aaron Rodgers all had games in which they threw for 316 yards this season: nobody cares until Tim Tebow does it. Everyone's seeking meaning in random numbers, even asking for comment from "Stone Cold" Steve Austin, as if he was the first to claim the 3:16 verse as his ow...

NFL Wildcard Weekend Open Thread: Atlanta Falcons At New York Giants
Day two of the best weekend ever kicks off from New Jersey with Joe Buck and Troy Aikman guiding us through all the things they're not so sure wouldn't, shouldn't, couldn't or didn't happen....

Eli Manning and Matt Ryan: Post-Turnover Face-Off
The quarterback matchup today isn't just about who can throw for more touchdowns, it's also about who can make the most ridiculous face after giving one away to the other team. While the Manning face is certainly more renowned, Matt Ryan is certainly no slouch. In anticipation of today's head-to-h...

Turns Out Tiger Woods' Ex-Wife Is The Homewrecker
Sure, Tiger was the one sleeping around and doing all manner of filthy things to all kinds of filthy ladies, but Elin Nordegren, apparently, is the one who left their children with a broken home. As reported earlier this week, Nordegren bought a $12 million house in North Palm Beach, Florida only t...

We've Identified Jilted Packergirl
Thanks to a tipster whose identity we'll keep secret for his/her own sake, we know the young lady featured in this morning's Wake Up Deadspin is named Annie Wagner (we also heard the cheating ex-boyfriend is a real "douchewibbler"). Here's Annie's Facebook....

A Directory Of Places Where You Can Watch Sports While Eating Chinese Food Today
Here is a very incomplete list of places in our great nation where you can watch sports while eating Chinese food today—as suggested by you, our readers. If you have more ideas, please let us know in the comments. All endorsements sic'd....

Victor Cruz Continued His Remarkable Season With This 99-Yard Touchdown Catch
Know who this guy is yet, Darrelle Revis? [FOX]...

Readers: Tell Us Where To Watch Sports While Eating Chinese On Dec. 25
Christmas is on Sunday, and while most public activity shuts down so the Christians and semi-Christians can worship American consumerism and baby Jesus, our nation's Jews will be eating Chinese food and watching hoops like it's just another Hanukkah weekend. What a world!...

On A Frosty Pennsylvania Morning, Jerry Sandusky Is Punxsutawney Phil
BELLEFONTE, Pa.—Jack-all of substance happened in the Centre County courthouse today, as you already know. Jerry Sandusky waived his preliminary hearing. No witnesses testified; no new information came out....

Xavier President Father Michael Graham Allegedly Threw Holy Water On Rowdy Fans As The Crosstown Brawl Raged
This is too weird to believe if we hadn't received multiple tips about it, and here's WLW 700 host Bill Cunningham on yesterday's program relating that he, too, had heard about Xavier president Fr. Michael Graham's bizarre behavior during the brawl that broke out in the Crosstown Shootout....
![Sandusky's Lawyer: If You Believe Witness, "I Suggest You Dial 1-800-REALITY." That's A Gay Phone Sex Line. [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18j4q6l9n5qebjpg.jpg)
Sandusky's Lawyer: If You Believe Witness, "I Suggest You Dial 1-800-REALITY." That's A Gay Phone Sex Line. [UPDATE]
Joe Amendola, the attorney for Jerry Sandusky who thus far has been lawyerin' like a man who got his J.D. from the bottom of a cereal box, did some more lawyerin' in front of the cameras this morning. The choicest moment: At one point, Amendola discussed the possibility that Mike McQueary witnessed ...
![Jerry Sandusky's Big Hearing Today Lasted Approximately One Minute [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18j4q6n8erp2bjpg.jpg)
Jerry Sandusky's Big Hearing Today Lasted Approximately One Minute [UPDATE]
Jerry Sandusky was supposed to have faced at least five of his accusers in court today, which is why so many media creatures (Deadspin included) had blown into town and all but lashed themselves to trees. Bellefonte stood at Sandusky pundit DEFCON 1. Instead, this is what happened (via StateCollege....

Greetings From Happy Valley: The Giddy Scene In Bellefonte, Pa., On The Night Before Jerry Sandusky's Hearing
BELLEFONTE, Pa.—Lock Haven is a small town attached to an oily green bend of the Susquehanna River in central Pennsylvania. It is the kind of place where Main Street is peppered with mom-and-pop shops and a quarter in the meter buys you 150 minutes. It is also the kind of place where an evil little ...

Greetings From Happy Valley: A Gallery
This was the scene last night in Bellefonte, Pa., at the intersection of Allegheny and High streets, just in front of the Centre County Courthouse....

ESPN Keeps Trying To Pretend It Cared About The Bernie Fine Molestation Allegations All Along
ESPN's Mark Schwarz, the reporter who spent eight years not reporting the story that a Syracuse ballboy had accused assistant coach Bernie Fine of molesting him, has now taken his own turn in the spotlight on the ESPN Rationalization Tour by talking to Sports Illustrated's Richard Deitsch. As Deitsc...

A Comprehensive Timeline Of The Child Sex Abuse Allegations Against Bernie Fine
On Nov. 17, ESPN reported that two men had accused Bernie Fine, 65, an assistant basketball coach at Syracuse since 1976, of molesting them when they were children. Fine denied the allegations, and Syracuse head coach Jim Boeheim angrily came to Fine's defense. Since then, another man went to Syrac...

Eight Years Later, ESPN Reports What It Knows About The Claims Against Bernie Fine
"I'm not Joe Paterno, I knew nothing," Bob Ley said on ESPN's Outside the Lines. Ley was quoting Syracuse basketball coach Jim Boeheim, who was responding to the investigation of sex-abuse claims against assistant coach Bernie Fine....

Ryan Braun Is MVP, Ken Williams's Lobster Was Compromised, And Other Hot Fucking Stove Developments
Your roundup of all the hottest hot-stove items of the day (and whatever shit Ken Rosenthal is throwing against the wall). This is ... HOT FUCKING STOVE!!!...

For The 2013 Season, The Astros Will Go To The AL West And Basically Everyone Will Go To The Playoffs
MLB's owners unanimously approved the sale of the Houston Astros from Drayton McLane to Jim Crane today, and included a $65 million price cut in the deal. The Astros will leave the NL Central and join the AL West for the 2013 season, and, to the relief of symmetricists everywhere, each league will h...