England Page 15 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Finally, Hulk Hogan Addresses The London Riots
Hulk Hogan joined Richard Bacon on BBC Radio 5 today, and a weary nation eagerly awaited the comforting words of the Hulkster. If the 24-inch pythons can't get those looters to settle down and shape up, nothing can....
BBC Mistakenly Confuses Media Gadfly For Baseball Expert, Substantial Awkwardness Ensues
Ben Walker writes about baseball for the Associated Press—you'll see his byline, or, perhaps, his words fairly often. Michael Wolff is not Ben Walker. Wolff is a media writer for Vanity Fair, which would never have heard of baseball were Michael Lewis not on its masthead....
"This Is A Great Day For Canada's Football," Says Canada Coach After Dumb Luck Delays Elimination Three More Days
I'm not sure what lessons we can learn from the U-17 World Cup (I hope none, because the US lost to Uzbekistan last night), but English goaltending looks like it'll be hopeless for the next couple of decades....
Undressed Mascot Loses Job, Regains Job, Confuses Adolescents
This is 40-year-old Tracy Chandler, who parades about as the Doncaster Rovers' mascot. Or as thousands of Yorkshire youngsters are now saying, "Donny...what...?"...
Watch This Drunk Guy Stumble Home
London's network of surveillance cameras finally pays off, with this stitched-together journey of one gentleman's trip home after being kicked out of a big celebrity get-together. [via Bob's Blitz]...
Try To Look Surprised: England Says World Cup Voters Asked For Bribes
Ever since the good, godfearing Anglo nations were shut out of the 2018 and 2022 World Cups, rumors have flown that Russia and Qatar bribed their way to the top. No one would be surprised because it's FIFA, but it was also sour grapes. And maybe it still is, but this time England is naming names....
Is This The Ultimate Insult To A Rival Team?
Your hated geographic rivals are suffering one of the worst humiliations in their 130-year history. What's a devoted fan who takes pleasure from the misery of others to do? Fly a goddamn airplane banner over their stadium....
An Update On Telling You Which Soccer Player Had An Affair With This Lady
We felt very bad last time. We hate blind items (though we did guess Ryan Giggs). But there's this thing in the UK where celebrities can get court-ordered injunctions against newspapers publishing items about their personal lives. They're called injunctions, and lots of celebrities have them, and to...
Tinfoil Hatters Have Something To Talk About For Man U-Chelsea
That's referee Howard Webb over there. A photoshop of him actually, because he doesn't really wear a Manchester United kit while refereeing. He wears a referee's shirt. After a controversial FA Cup match in January, with some controversial decisions going United's way, Liverpool player Ryan Babel po...
Listen To This Cricket Announcer Describe A Ball Heading Directly For His Face
Edward Bevan, cricket announcer for BBC Sport Wales, nearly dodged a ball hit into the announcer's booth by a Somerset player on Monday. More impressively, he narrated its approach: "It's coming up, is it going to hit us?" Bevan manages, and then you hear the kind of glass-smashing sound effect you ...
Everything About This Ref-Getting-Leveled Video Is Amazing
There are better quality videos of English referee Sian Massey getting taken down yesterday. But they don't come with the built-in commentary....
Jack Edwards's Baffling Pro-Boston, Anti-Royalty Rant
Noted homer Jack Edwards probably couldn't sleep last night after his beloved Bruins came back to oust the Canadiens in 7 games. But before tossing and turning with visions of Jozef Stümpel dancing in his head, he had some parting words on the NESN postgame show....
The Most Deliberate Own Goal You'll Ever See
A week old, but just making the rounds now. From England's fifth-tier Blue Square Premier, a striker is instructed to get back to help cover on defense. With a lob coming his way, reflexes take over, and rather than clear, he volleys it past his own keeper. Poor bastard....
Why We Can't Tell You Which Soccer Player Had An Affair With This Lady
Because we don't know. (We're pretty sure it's Giggs, but that's not the point.) And we may never know, as a British judge granted an injunction against a newspaper to prevent it from revealing the details of the player's affair with Imogen Thomas....
Watch A Single Hill Completely Wreck A Steady Stream Of Bikers
BUCS (the British Universities and Colleges Sport) held their championships last week, and our favorite sport was the cross country mountain biking. Someone was kind enough to put together a compilation of the best wipeouts on the same downhill section, and we can't top their word choice: carnage....
Three Arrested, Six Ejected At FA Youth Cup; Remaining Man U Fans Chant About Terrible Disasters
Liverpool and Manchester United played in the annual FA Youth Cup on Sunday. United came back from two goals down to win, 3-2. The other final count at Anfield: three fans arrested for drunkenness, six ejected for what was likely more controlled drunkenness, and reports that a section of United fa...
Gary Lineker Pooped Himself During A World Cup Match
Hi, welcome to Deadspin. We like poop here. Yet shockingly, we've never posted an actual video of someone soiling themselves. Until now....
Today's Ridiculous Sex Rumor That Explains England's World Cup Collapse
Did you hear? The English soccer team did not do so well at the World Cup. Want to know why? A locker room divided over a teammate's extramarital affair, of course. Stop me if you've heard this one....
England Players Robbed Of More Than Just Goals And Dignity
As if enough shame and scorn has not been heaped on the English side today, word comes out of South Africa that they were also robbed during their too-brief visit. Fortunately, justice there is swift and exacting. Unlike Wayne Rooney....
Weekend Winner: English Tabloid Headlines
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the editors of The Sun, who...well, just look....