et Page 1740 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Portland Man Running For Mayor, Punching Pick-Up Basketball Opponents In The Balls
I should clear something up. Democrat Jefferson Smith (pictured, right)* has denied punching any pick-up basketball opponent in the balls. His opponent yelled "You just punched me in the balls!" and Smith replied "I punched you in the thigh, not the balls." So, in the interest of fair and balanced c...

Baseball Writers Of America: "It's Hot"
A little advice to aspring sports writers: if it's hot at the baseball game you're covering, mention it in the lead. No matter what—even if the heat affected both teams equally, or not at all—don't let three paragraphs go by without pointing out how hot it was. You were there. It was hot. The people...

Adrian Peterson Reportedly Shoved Off-Duty Cop Working Security At Night Club
According to TMZ, Kase Smith, public information officer for the Houston police department, claims Peterson shoved an off-duty cop who was working as a bouncer in the club he visited last night. The officer/bouncer reportedly told Peterson it was time to leave and Peterson apparently ignored the in...

Associated Press: Oklahoma City Thunder Sign Brian Westbrook And The Guy From <em>27 Dresses</em>, Serge Ibaka Excited To Play Them In Olympics
Oklahoma City Thunder power forward Serge Ibaka will be playing for the Spanish national team at this year's summer Olympics. Today, the Associated Press published a relatively mundane story about Ibaka's belief that his Spanish team has the talent to compete with the U.S. team....

Annual Spain Is Full Of Drunk Psychotics Festival Begins Today
"Spain is different to anything I've experienced before,' said Michael Arraztoa, 25, from Bakersfield, California."...
![Reports: Vikings RB Adrian Peterson Arrested, Charged With Resisting Arrest [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17s3q72lnjwbojpg.jpg)
Reports: Vikings RB Adrian Peterson Arrested, Charged With Resisting Arrest [UPDATE]
Details are still sketchy but according to the Houston Chronicle, Adrian Peterson may still be in a Houston jail (he's since been released on $1,000 bond) in connection with resisting arrest charges....

Watch Eric Gordon Slowly Back Away From Reporters While Giving World's Most Awkward Interview
Yesterday we told you about poor Eric Gordon's desperate quest to get out of New Orleans, despite the fact that the Hornets will almost certainly match the Phoenix Suns' four-year, $58 million offer sheet....

Freeh Investigation Report Said To Be "Tough On Paterno"
According to ESPN The Magazine's Don Van Natta, Jr., The Freeh report should be released as soon as next week. It is expected to be bad for Joe Paterno....

Was Kate Upton Drunk At Last Night's Tigers Game?
Michigan native and Sports Illustrated swimsuit model Kate Upton showed up at last night's Tigers-Royals bout at Comerica Park, partying in Justin Verlander's suite and launching a Twitterstorm....

Eric Gordon Really, Really Wants Out Of New Orleans
The Hornets guard is in Las Vegas, vying for a spot on the Olympic team, and he's telling anyone who will listen just how much he'd rather play in Phoenix than New Orleans. Coincidentally, he just agreed to a four-year, $58 million offer sheet with the Suns!...

Tom Cruise Vs. Werner Herzog And Adventures In Perilous White People Tourism: It's Time For Trailer Hitch
The summer movie world is in a bit of a lull right now: Spider-Man showed up in time for July 4, Savages sneaked in just under the "Blake Lively Being Double Teamed-Themed Festivus Day" holiday wire and now everyone's slowing their roll for a couple of weeks until The Dark Knight Rises opens. Which ...

Dead Letters: Italy Unifies And Declares War On Barry Petchesky
Because it’s a holiday week, we’ve got a special edition of Dead Letters for you. It’s all the angry tweets Italians sent Deadspin staff writer Barry Petchesky after he published “Italy Beats Germany In Soccer, Vulgar Newspaper Headlines” on June 29. The Italians apparently took special exception to...

Chargers Now Actively Trying To Sell Tickets To Chiefs Fans
The Chargers' attendance issues are legendary. The weather's too nice. The stadium's too old. Norv Turner's just going to do something stupid and they're going to crash out just shy of the playoffs again. There are all sorts of reasons why Qualcomm doesn't fill up. Failing to adequately advertise to...

The 76ers Will Release Elton Brand, Claim First Place In The "Saddest Offseason Maneuver" Rankings
Yesterday, we asked you to join us in a discussion on what NBA offseason move has been the saddest. At the time, Rashard Lewis being traded for Emeka Okafor and Trevor Ariza held the top spot in the Sadness Rankings, but that was quickly surpassed by the Knicks signing Jason Kidd....

Brandon Roy Comes Out Of Retirement To Play For The Minnesota Timberwolves
Brandon Roy was, not so long ago, one of the NBA's premier players. He was a smooth-handling shooting guard who could pass, nail step-back jumpers, and explode to the rim with surprising athleticism. It seemed all but certain that Roy would become one of the defining players of this era, taking a s...

Oops! Joe Paterno Knew How To Use Email After All
The Chronicle of Higher Education is reporting today that it has obtained evidence demonstrating that, contrary to claims from his family's legal representatives, former Penn State football coach Joe Paterno was in fact able to use email. And he wasn't afraid to do so in order to try and protect hi...

This Sure Looks Like Andris Biedrins Getting Oral Sex In The Back Seat Of A Car
Latvian news site Puaro has published a pair of photos showing what it claims to be Warriors center Andris Biedrins, on the receiving end of some public loving. The site is short on details, running only this short caption, helpfully butchered by Google Translate:...

Gahhh! Japanese Baseball Is Terrifying, Reports Hiroki Kuroda
That smiling man up there is Hiroki Kuroda of the New York Yankees. Kuroda's first season in the American League has been a good one—he's got a 134 ERA+ in 16 starts heading into the all-star break. So he has good reason to smile now. But he didn't, way back when, writes David Waldstein in the New Y...

Yerrrr Out-Out-Out-Out!: An Animated Gallery Of Every MLB Umpire's Strike-Three Call (Part 2)
Enjoyed our first batch of strike-three calls? Well, here's another heaping helping for you. This collection includes such notables as Jim Joyce, Angel Hernandez, Balkin' Bob Davidson, and the legendary contortions of one Tom Hallion, who may have the greatest punchout in the history of umpiring. Sc...

Yerrrr Out-Out-Out-Out!: An Animated Gallery Of Every MLB Umpire's Strike-Three Call (Part 1)
At last, after 72 entries, we've completed our Better Know An Umpire series. We hope you've enjoyed learning more about the human elements in blue, the men who wander anonymously through the sport, even as they make the game all about them. Next time some stooge in a chest protector screws your team...