et Page 2351 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Another Non-Descript Gay "Comes Out"
OK, we'll be honest: We're getting tired of gay athletes. What, you ask? You didn't know of any gay athletes? Well, the only gay athletes that exist, apparently, are those who play obscure sports at tiny universities. (The most only thing wrong with gay athletes is how they inspire every journalis...
Tell Us Where On The Doll The Coach Touched Himself
From the Motivational Speaker File: Miami high school baseball coach Lazer Callazo resigned yesterday after a curious attempt to pump up his team. To quote The Miami Herald:...
Jamal Lewis Soon To Be Nobody's Bitch
We are but a week away from Jamal Lewis' freedom. On June 2, the Ravens running back will finish his four-month prison sentence for drug trafficking. Apparently he's been doing fine during incarcertion, working in the prison toolshed and checking out library books. (Right.) How will Jamal adjust t...
AI Gets Gays All Hot And Bothered
From OutSports.com's Daily Blog today:...
McEwing Still Stalking Wright
One of the more amusing subplots of spring training this year was the strange, moderately disturbing friendship that developed between Mets third baseman David Wright and then-Mets-now-Royals utilityman Joe "Gritty, Gutty, Spunky, Fiesty" McEwing. Wright was reportedly in tears when McEwing, tota...
In Manhattan, This Could Get Him A One-Bedroom With A Working Toilet
Mike Tyson, whose debt is larger than most third-world nations' GDPs, has bought a $2.1 million home in Arizona. He is scheduled to fight another stiff white guy in June in Washington, D.C. So that's fun. We're still waiting for Little Mac to challenge him again....
Ewing's Ex Gets Her Pound Of Flesh
Patrick Ewing's ex-wife certainly had to deal with her share of indignities, from his alleged affair with a Knick City Dancer to the infamous Atlanta Gold Club Trial. Well, she gets her revenge this morning in the New York Daily News, talking trash while promoting her new novel, Brickhouse, abou...
The Next Box Office Smash
From the St. Louis Post Dispatch:...
Tom Verducci Cleans Up His Own Mess
This week's Sports Ilustrated cover story — apparently SI.com has a magazine? — is about "the incredible shrinking slugger." The writer of this story is, of course, Tom Verducci, whose front page interview with Ken Caminiti three years ago got this whole ball rolling. Wouldn't it be hysterical if so...
Hey Fans, Come Pee In A Cup!
In the tradition of wacky minor league promotions everywhere, the Sioux Falls Canaries held a BALCO Be Gone promotion last night. All fans who arrived were given a free specimen cup and were tested for steroids throughout the game. (No word on how many fans ended up juiced.) They also had other g...
The Notorious Punter
Todd Sauerbrun has always made a little too much news for a punter. It started when the Bears made him a second-round draft pick, which was a totally good idea, really. Then he was accused of taking steroids prescribed by Panthers team doctors. Then he was involved in some hot punter-on-punter tr...
Tyrone Calico: Parking Novice
Any teenage boy could tell you the importance of parking. When your parents won't leave the house and you can't afford a hotel, the only place you can make out with girls is in your car. There are some key rules, though:...
Boobs. Is There Anything Else Newsworthy?
You didn't think we'd ignore this all day, did you? The New York Post features a sports column today from the only person who knows less about the NBA than Peter Vescey: Anna Benson! The wife of overpaid Mets righthander Kris Benson penned the first of what will hopefully be millions of NY Post d...
Bo Bice: The New Reggie Miller
Those looking for next "clutch" player to replace Reggie "Never Won A Title But Am Somehow Considered The Best Crunch Time Guy Ever" Miller should turn their eyes away from the court and toward lousy FOX reality television, says Flak's Bob Cook in his weekly "Bring Out The Sports!" column. (We re...
HBO Real Sports Keeping Busy
From the NBA/WNBA Gossip Yahoo Group:...
Put That Coffee DOWN
As Sinead O'Connor once said: "Fight the real enemy." In this case, the World Anti-Doping Agency says that enemy is coffee. The agency head, the unfortunately named Dick Pound, says the agency is considering putting caffeine on the banned substances list. Apparently the Australian Institute of Sport...
"I'm Having Dreams About Grant Wistrom"
One of our favorite mailing lists is the NFLwives club Yahoo Group. A recent discussion concerning which white football players would be willing to date black women (don't ask) yielded this tidbit from a poster named "first_chose":...
Congressional Steroids Diary: My God, There's More Hearing Tomorrow
1:28 p.m.: Sonny Bono s widow is telling Donald Fehr a story about a high school student she knows who was so strong that he pulled his finger off while swinging a bat. That actually just occurred, right? Might have been a mass hallucination....
Congressional Steroids Diary: Limping, Bleeding Into The Afternoon
11:26 a.m.: Say what you will about the guy, but Don Fehr is no wuss. He just went through each point of the proposed anti-steroid bill and trashed pretty much all of them. Fortunately, he was followed by the commissioner of a league that doesn t really exist right now, so no one will remember....
Congressional Steroids Diary: The First Hour
10:10 a.m.: Representative Cliff Stearns (R-Fla.) says that sports values performance more than character. No!...