et Page 1971 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The 27 Hottest Employees Of The Venture Capital Firm That's Investing $22 Million In Bleacher Report: A Slideshow
As you know, Oak Investment Partners is lavishing a large sum of money on Bleacher Report. But what is Oak Investment Partners? Who are these people? Why, they're only some of the hottest hotties venturing capital today. Let's have a look....

Bartolo Colon-O-Meter: It's A Fine Line Between Failure And Non-Failure
What did Bartolo Colon teach us about our place in the universe last night? Special philosophical correspondent David Roher was at the ballpark to witness the veteran Yankee's performance against Oakland, as Colon fell behind the A's 5-0—with two of the runs scoring after he'd left the game, on a do...

This Is The Bloodied Marine That LSU's Jordan Jefferson Allegedly Kicked In The Face
We were sent this image purporting to be of the good samaritan, returning from Marine Corps training, who rushed to break up a Baton Rouge bar fight and ended up getting pummeled by at least four LSU players. We've been unable to confirm—the cops have instituted a media blackout, to the extent that ...

Exit Felix Pie; Luke Scott Will Have To Find A New Dark-Skinned Teammate To Throw Banana Chips At
Baseball's most discomfiting buddy comedy is near cancellation: Yesterday, the Baltimore Orioles designated outfielder Felix Pie for assignment, effectively ending his role as the some-of-my-best-friends-are-black clubhouse foil for redneck performance artist Luke Scott. ...

Samuel Eto'o Will Leave Inter Milan For Obscure Russian Club (And Billions Of Rubles)
Samuel Eto'o, the 30-year-old Cameroonian soccer player, is leaving the glitz and prestige of Serie A's Inter Milan to play "for an obscure club in the violence-wracked Caucasus region of Dagestan, Russia." From Milan, one of the world's fashion capitals, to Dagestan: the land of the mountains. This...

Sally Jenkins's Pat Summitt Piece Will Break Your Heart
Jenkins, the longtime Washington Post writer, is one of Summitt's best friends. She discloses that in her piece, which you should read now....

Pat Summitt Diagnosed With Dementia, Will Still Coach This Season (Updated With Summitt's Taped Statement)
Sad news out of Knoxville: CBS's Gregg Doyel reports that Pat Summitt—head coach of Tennessee's women's basketball team and the most successful coach in NCAA history—has been diagnosed with dementia. She's just 59 years old. ...

Angel Pagan Was Busy Taking A Shit When He Was Due Up To Bat
"Apparently Pagan 'felt a rumble at the end of the fourth' and ended up spending a significant portion of the fifth shitting, while his coach screamed his name from the dugout in vain." [NYDN, via Gawker]...

The Newark Bears Will Celebrate Jim Leyritz Night With A $2,000 M.A.D.D. Donation And A Beer Pong Tournament
Even without mixed drinks, it sends mixed signals. A year ago, Leyritz was found innocent of felony manslaughter, but guilty of DUI in a 2007 crash....

Favre Look-Alike Wasn't Trying To Fool Anyone By Wearing Favre Jersey Around Green Bay
Remember that guy who went to a Packers practice last week and impersonated a certain No. 4 known for gunslinging photos of his dong via text? His name is Kirk Ermatinger, he's from Ripon, Wis., and a Green Bay television station has caught up with him. Yes, Ermatinger acknowledged, he looks just l...

Derek Jeter And Tom Brady Were Awkward High School Boys Once
The SI Vault published 28 photographs of athletes from their high school yearbooks today. There are plenty of highlights—Brett Favre's mullet, Barry Bonds's jheri curl, and Mark McGwire's poignant senior quote, to name a few—but our personal favorites feature young, awkward Derek Jeter and young, aw...

Kansas College Suspends Its Golfers For Dongish Facebook Photo, But Team Captain Jack Hiscock Says They're Appealing The Suspension
Lindsborg, Kansas's tiny Bethany College—a Lutheran school, home of the Fighting Swedes—has suspended its entire golf team for three tournaments as a punishment for taking the above naked photo together. You can't see any dong in the shot, but it's there, under the golfing gear....

San Francisco 49ers-Oakland Raiders Annual Preseason Series May Be Eliminated Due To Crazy Fan Violence
"Raiders and 49ers expected to issue a joint statement announcing that their annual exhibition series will be suspended."[Via Tim Kawakami]...

Sabermetrix Are For Kids: Introducing Our Little League World Series Power Ranking And Prediction Engine
We're a few days into the Little League World Series, which means it's time to unveil our system for evaluating the teams: DRURY, or Determination of Robustness of Undoubtedly Rambunctious Youths. It takes box score statistics from every game, converts them into a composite runs scored and allowed p...

Dear Grantland: Why Won't You Let Yourself Be Loved?
In the absence of a comment space on ESPN's Grantland website, Deadspin continues to supply a space for Grantland readers to share their feedback. Please send corrections and comments to [email protected], subject "Dear Grantland."...

The One Where An Ex-Pharmacist Offers Us Proof That Tiger Woods And Elin Have Herpes
Welcome back to Deleted Scenes. This space is now reserved for those scuzz-money entrepreneurs who've unsuccessfully tried to sell us prurient information. This is also where we'll run notable emails we've received from some of our readers. All emails are [sic]'d. Enjoy. ...

Man With Rotting, Cancerous Penis Claims Surgeon Removed Rotting, Cancerous Penis Without Permission
"[Phillip, penis-less man]Seaton's lawyer, Kevin George, told the jury during opening arguments that his client doesn't feel like a man. He showed the jury four photographs of Seaton's groin saying, "You can see there's nothing there." Four photographs seems excessive. [Jackson Sun]...

ESPN's Ian O'Connor Confuses His Job Duties With Eli Manning's
Did you hear what Plaxico Burress did at the Meadowlands last night? He did nothing. The ESPN.com caption this morning was "Plaxico Burress shines in his first game back in the NFL, scoring a touchdown against the Bengals on Sunday." This is a stupid lie, born of boredom and fraud: Burress's first g...

The Cool Kids Will Now Be Sitting At Bleacher Report's Lunch Table: A Slideshow
Introducing your new Bleacher Report "National Lead Writers" ......

Gird Your Loins, Green Bay: Some Dude Is Running Around Town Pretending To Be Brett Favre
We hear completely retired NFL quarterback Brett Favre is pretty revered up in Wisconsin. Especially in the town of Green Bay. Midwesterners are forgiving folks, and they put up with the whole dong-texting and playing-for-the-Vikings thing. So, as you might expect, some dude (pictured above) pretend...