gi Page 531 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Definitive Proof That Time Expired Before MSU's Miracle, And Why It Doesn't Matter
An enterprising soul has gone frame-by-frame and determined that the Spartans' ballsy fake should never have counted. And yet, the refs called the play exactly as they should have....

Weekend Winner: Sparty's Balls (If Not His Vascular System)
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Michigan State coach Mark Dantonio, who beat Notre Dame on a wonderfully idiotic fake field goal in overtime and then survived a "minor" heart attack....

Plaxico Burress Talks About Being in Prison, Doesn't Seem to Like It
The New York Daily News spared no hokey imagery in bringing America the long-awaited "Hey, I wonder how Plaxico Burress feels after almost a year of being locked up" story today....

Analyst: Cardinals Quit With "Poopy in their Pants" and "Skid Marks in Their Britches"
Former St. Louis Cardinals outfielder, and current team anaylst, Jack "The Ripper" Clark has grown tired with the home nine's lack of effort. He isn't content just to mention that they're "quitters," though. He gets all diagnosis-y with it....

Tuneful, Preppy Version Of "Bitches Ain't Shit" Suggests Bitches May Be Shit, After All
Oh, there's nothing quite like a post-ironic a cappella version of a white man's very ironic cover of a Dr. Dre song done by a group of spunky young tarts....

Werner Herzog's Thrilling Car Accident Rescue Story Has Been Animated
Saying Werner Herzog is interesting is an understatement. He gives that Dos Equis Guy a serious run for his money in the Interesting Department. Here's an animated version of the time he saved Joaquin Phoenix from a hideous car wreck. [Kottke]...

Baseball Player Acts Like Soccer Player, Inspires Existential Crises
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Atlanta Braves Fans Are Filthier Than The Guys Using The John In Penn Station, Science Proves
"Only about two-thirds of the men observed washed their hands after using the restroom at Turner Field — the lowest rate for any of the locations cited in the observational study and survey on the hand-washing habits of Americans."...

Deadspin I-Team: The Case Of Owen Wilson Urinating In Public
See that photo, I-Team? That's the guy from Marmaduke pissing on a golf course yesterday. Yes, he's wearing a Warriors shirt. But there is so much more to know, I-Team. That's where you come into play....

Larissa Riquelme’s Naked Body Gets The 3-D Treatment (NSFW)
Fast forward in your mind's eye to the next World Cup and what do you see? Silly new match balls? Droning horns? Stadiums full of girls with mobile phones placed between their knockers hoping to make a fortune?...

Bernard Pollard Tells Reggie Wayne Off
When he isn't maiming members of the Patriots, Bernard Pollard moonlights as one of the better safeties in the NFL. However, as Reggie Wayne learned yesterday, Pollard isn't doing any of this all that quietly. H/T Mike and Tim....

Have Your Way With Eli Manning
Wanna know a great way to spend a hungover Friday? How about side-by-side with Eli Manning! "All you need is an image of yourself and a few minutes," says this day-making Toyota website. (A-Rod is all "mm-hmm.") Let's play!...

Tennessee Football Team Doesn't Know How To Properly Bathe
A staph infection outbreak among several Tennessee football players left coach Derek Dooley with no option other than to conduct a team-wide clinic on proper showering technique and hygiene. Work up a rich lather after the jump....

Mark Sanchez Should Refrain From Sending Brooke Hundley Cock Shots (UPDATE)
Or not. But, Miss Hundley, former ESPN production assistant/part-time illicit lover of Steve Phillips, is now training to become a spunky promo girl for the Jets/Giants games at the New Meadowlands Stadium....

A.J. Green, Jersey Sales, And The NCAA's Hypocrisy In Eight Easy Pictures
UGA's top receiver just got a four-game suspension for allegations that he sold one of his game-used jerseys. Meanwhile, let's take a look at what's for sale in Georgia's official team store....

Last Night's Winner: Boise State's Bogus BCS Busting
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like those media darling Broncos, who proved they belong in the National Championship discussion. Unfortunately, they won't prove it again, yet people won't be able to shut up about them....

Reggie Bush To Be Stripped Of Heisman
Yahoo is reporting that Reggie Bush will be stripped of his Heisman Trophy by the end of the month. Because his college experience was more of a sham than, say, Vince "6 on the Wonderlic" Young....

Mayweather Repents For Rant: "Didn't Mean It"
And on the seventh day, Deadspin posted one video of Floyd Mayweather apologizing to Manny Pacquiao and "everyone," while also linking to the video that made such an apology necessary....

Jets' Command Center Offers Real-Time Analytics for Sales, Stats Freaks
Austin Carr over at Fast Company is a stats junkie. When he heard about the "Command Center" at The New Meadowlands Stadium—a real-time analytics tool that tracks ticket sales, concessions, and more—he had to see it for himself....

Da'Sean Butler's Children's Story Is Very Disturbing
The WVU star and Heat second round pick wrote a children's story yesterday, about dinosaur poop, GameStop and "whoopie cakes." It's beyond bizarre, and he posted it on Twitter, 140 characters at a time....