hi Page 1503 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Jerry Sandusky's Lawyer Says Sandusky Was Too Busy Being A Swell Guy To Molest Any Children
You know that plan Lawyerin' Joe Amendola had to get Jerry Sandusky a new trial by declaring himself incompetent? Yeah, that can wait. For now, on the eve of Sandusky's sentencing hearing, Lawyerin Joe's sticking to the script that Sandusky is innocent, and that there's just no way Sandusky could ha...

Robert Griffin III Is The Quarterback Of The Future Of The Past
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Here's The Wizznutzz Turning John Hollinger Into A Zagat's Of Existential Basketball Despair
Last week, ESPN's John Hollinger broke down the strengths and weaknesses of the Washington Wizards roster (Insider). Fans could find some bright spots if they looked: John Wall has "blinding open-court speed"; Nene is a "strong, quick big man who can run floor." But Wizards fans know better than to...


Division III Football Game Provides Reminder Not To Storm The Field Until The Game Is Actually Over
Division III played host to one of the craziest football game endings in recent history Saturday. Concordia College (Moorhead) led Bethel University 14-7 and forced a Bethel fumble on what should have been the last play of the game; Concordia players rushed onto the field in celebration, but the p...

![The Air-Humping Chicago Bears Assistant Coach Is Really Gross [UPDATE: The Air-Humper Has Been Identified]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
The Air-Humping Chicago Bears Assistant Coach Is Really Gross [UPDATE: The Air-Humper Has Been Identified]
Gross. That is really gross, dude. You're way too old to be doing stuff like this. I'm sure the "Hey loogit me y'all, I'm humpin' air. Hee haw!" routine used to be really funny back in your college days, but you're a grown-up now; a grown-up who should know that air-humping—especially while using ...

Did TBS Crap Out On You During The Playoffs? Blame The Sun.
Ah, the sun. Giver of life. Grower of crops. Sworn enemy of the MLB Playoffs on TBS. For Cardinals fans watching their team begin a championship defense, and for Nationals fans watching their first playoff game ever, yesterday's broadcast was a frustrating one. On multiple occasions, TBS's feed froz...

College ShameDay: Who Embarrassed Themselves On Saturday (Besides Auburn; Auburn Is Just The Worst)?
Our weekly college football shame index. ...

The Colts Discount Double Checked And B.J. Raji-Shuffled All Over The Packers: Your Sunday NFL GIF Roundup
Here's where we're putting the GIFs of the week, from Donald Brown triumphantly trolling the Packers to Brandon Lloyd dancing around like no one's looking....

Twitter Lets Bud Selig Know That The Teams With Better Records Are Getting Screwed
SI's Jay Jaffe had it pretty much pegged in August: the MLB's Division Series format this year makes just about no sense, and as a result, we're seeing teams with superior records (and more exciting stories, like the upstart A's) wading into unfriendly waters for their first two games. It's already ...

"It's Sickening. And I was Embarrassed": Eric Winston Responds To Kansas City Fans Cheering Matt Cassel Injury
On NFL.com, Matt Cassel's afternoon was described as "an unbridled disaster." He was 9-for-15 with 92 yards and two interceptions. He also had a fumble on a third-quarter drive where the Chiefs were actually moving the ball. Then in the fourth quarter he was knocked out of the game with a head inj...

Iowa School District Not Satisfied With Current Pussification Of American Students, Wants To Take It Up A Notch
They want to get rid of running laps as punishment in high school sports. Some scientist nerds say it amounts to corporal punishment. Corporal punishment is currently illegal in Iowa—way to go, guys—but there is a specific exemption in the definition allowing for "reasonable requests or requirements...

Here's The Hit That Knocked Robert Griffin III Out Of The Game
On third and goal from the three yard line Robert Griffin scrambled and then took a brutal shot to the head from Sean Weatherspoon near the sideline. Griffin III remained on the turf for a few moments and was eventually helped off the field....

Here's The Ohio State Marching Band's Shout Out To Video Games
Ohio State smoked Nebraska 63-38 yesterday before 106,102 fans, which is apparently an Ohio Stadium record. The fans who stayed in their seats for the halftime show were treated to a medley of old-and-new-school video game themes and characters. Super Mario Bros., Zelda, Tetris and Halo were just ...

Division Series Yak-Athon: Your MLB Playoffs Open Thread
All day October baseball! At 12:07, the A's—who took a punch from the Tigers in chilly Detroit last night—have a chance to even the series. At 3:07, the Nationals get their first look at the postseason since the franchise was—holy shit, since 1981? Woah. 6:07, Orioles-Yankees, in what's sure to be a...

Kansas City Royals Broadcaster May Have Written The Next Great Love Song
To my mind, the most important part of a love song is a memorable first line. It's also the hardest part. So it was with great admiration and not just a little jealousy that we viewed Royals pre and post-game man Joel Goldberg's sneak peek into the writing process....

Arizona's Three Losses Are The Worst Three Losses In College Football
Candidate for most crud-awful season in football this year: the Arizona Wildcats. Started 3-0, including handsome win over Oklahoma State team to get expectations buzzing. The Associated Press ranked the Cats for the first time since 2010. Next came a 56-0 paste job of South Carolina State. Oats wer...

Auburn Wrests Title Of "Team Everyone Wants To Play" From Arkansas
Arkansas beat Auburn today, which in itself wouldn't be so strange except that as recently as this morning it was reasonable to ask whether Arkansas would ever win another game, ever, ever. The Hogs were a preseason top-10 team that lost f̶i̶v̶e̶ four games—in September. If someone was to cushion th...

Beer Of The Week: Blue Buck, In Time For Canadian Thanksgiving
Monday marks a holiday that in Canada is known as Thanksgiving. Any American will recognize the basic outlines of the day: Get together with friends and family and eat until you can compare stretchmarks and then succumb to naps. That doesn't mean it's the same holiday. Care to (U) guess (S) which (A...