Houston Astros Page 27 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Roger Clemens Will Teach Young Astros Pitchers Everything He Knows
I hope everyone is ready for Roger Clemens to make the long, painful transition from controversy-dogged outcast to wizened baseball mentor, because it's going to happen. With two bizarre perjury trials and a flirtation with an MLB cameo in the rearview mirror, Clemens is turning his thoughts to coac...
The Poor Astros Will Be Sent To Slaughter On Baseball's Opening Night
MLB just announced which two teams will be facing off in the first game of the 2013 season, and the matchup is a curious one. On one side there are the Texas Rangers, a team that has proven itself to be one of the most exciting and watchable squads in baseball over the course of the last three seas...
MLB Leaks New Astros Logo, Inexplicably Blames Hurricane Sandy
The Astros are headed to the AL next year, and with a new league comes a new look-a blue and orange rebranding (because the Mets are totally the franchise you want to evoke) and a lone star logo. We know all this because it has leaked repeatedly in the last few days. First, it was merchandise at loc...
A Miserable Season From The Houston Astros Ended With A Glorious Faceplant In The Dirt
Poor Carlos Corporán, who actually had a good game for the 'stros, getting them on the board with a run-scoring single in the first and then grabbing another hit after Houston tied the game in the eighth with a three-run home run. However, a botched hit-and-run turned Corporán into an easy out for C...
The Astros Are Selling Tickets To A Lunch With Joe Niekro, Who Has Been Dead Since 2006
Above, the Astros's official Facebook page, on which they are currently advertising next weekend's Legends Weekend. The deal?...
Kid's Sign At Phillies Game: "If I Can Beat Cancer, You Can Beat The Astros"
This year's Astros team has drawn plenty of unfavorable comparisons, but now we finally can add one worse than the '62 Mets to the list: childhood cancer. A kid at last night's Philly-Houston game was spotted holding the above sign, which, considering the incredible strength required for a child to ...
![Astros Pitcher Mickey Storey Knocked Out Of Game After Taking Line Drive To The Face [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17z09biichg32jpg.jpg)
Astros Pitcher Mickey Storey Knocked Out Of Game After Taking Line Drive To The Face [UPDATE]
A bad season for Houston got even worse tonight as rookie Astros pitcher Mickey Storey was knocked out of tonight's game on a play eerily similar to the one that left A's pitcher Brandon McCarthy with a fractured skull last week....
The Astros' Manager Incentivizes His Players By Awarding A $200 Set Of Headphones After Every Win
We've made a lot of fun of the Astros recently. Just this morning, even. (Hey, at least we're paying attention.) But the joke of a roster they field and joke of a style they play likely leads you to mistaken assumptions. It probably makes you think the Astros aren't a first-class organization devote...
The Astros Are Now Hurting Other People With Their Ineptitude
At first, we found the Houston Astros' nightly slapstick routine to be rather endearing, and it was easy to have laugh at their repeated shenanigans. But then, through no fault but their own, the Astros couldn't even run out simple ground balls without one of their own getting hurt....
1,100 Households Watched The Astros Game On Sunday, The Team's Worst TV Rating Ever
The weekend Nielsens are in, and Houstonians are apparently enjoying the last of the summer. Nearly half-a-million households, or 44 percent of TVs in use, were tuned in to the Texans' boring win over the Dolphins. That's not great—worse than all but four games last year. But it's gangbusters compar...
Roger Clemens And The Astros Are Entangled In A Slow, Depressing Dance
We've posted on and on about how Sugar Land Skeeters ace Roger Clemens may be conspiring with the 44-97 Houston Astros to tweak his Hall of Fame chances. Today the Associated Press has given us a bombshell story—bombshell as in, the charred debris that remains after a horrendous event—about the Astr...
The Pirates Are Still Putting Fans To Sleep
Fans at PNC Park began the season by falling asleep, but then the Pirates provided enough of a jolt to keep folks interested into September. And while they're still just two and a half games out of the wild card, the Buccos have lost 10 of 13, including a sweep at Milwaukee over the weekend that ble...
Astros Player Suffers The Most Astros Injury Ever
Yes, that's Astros shortstop Marwin Gonzalez flying over first base for no apparent reason last night. As you can see in the video below, Gonzalez lunged to try to beat out a grounder, but he planted his left foot just in front of the bag, which suddenly propelled him skyward for a moment. And look ...
The Houston Astros Are Just The Worst
Today is gonna be the day that they're gonna throw it back to you. By now you shoulda somehow realized what you gotta do. I don't believe that anybody feels the way I do about you now....
Astros Owner Open To Signing Roger Clemens, But Doesn't Want It To Be A "Publicity Stunt"
You have to give the Astros credit. If they're going to go through with this Roger Clemens cahoots-laden charade, they're going to try and squeeze every last revenue dollar out of it....
The Baseball Hall Of Fame Probably Wouldn't Change The Rules If Roger Clemens Pitched A Meaningless Game This Year
Yesterday we half-floated a conspiracy theory that Roger Clemens's impending comeback with the Sugar Land Skeeters was a sneaky ploy to reappear in a major league game for the woeful Astros so that he might push his first hall of fame ballot appearance back five years, to 2017. So we reached out to ...
Roger Clemens And The Astros Might Just Be In Cahoots
The Astros have a lot of problems. Have you seen the lineup they're running out there every night? It's Jose Altuve, Brett Wallace, and then a lot of quadruple-A players with no business sniffing a big-league starting lineup. Need Justin Maxwell? Astros got him. Need Scott Moore? He's a 'Stro. Wonde...
The Houston Astros Tossed A Band-Aid Into A Flowing River Of Blood
Manager Brad Mills was fired last night. No longer shall he be burdened with holding the rudder of the one-player-currently-making-more-than-$750,000-Houston Astros. The team announced the move via email last night, following a particularly Houston Astro-ish loss to the Diamondbacks. Houston also se...
Roger Bernadina Pulls Off The Season's Most Dramatic Game-Ending Catch
How much more heartache can Astros fans take? Finally, a game in which they were actually competitive and didn't give away the winning run while Benny Hill music seemingly played in the background. No, the Astros suffered a hard-luck loss tonight, putting the winning run on first base in the 12th in...