ing Page 1479 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Later, Roy Williams Told A Masseuse That The Gulf Oil Catastrophe Was Nothing Compared To His Sunburn
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Byzantine Facebook Recruiting Rules Trip Up UVa
Virginia Coach Mike London is in trouble not because he sent recruit Curtis Grant a Facebook message, but because he didn't do it secretly. Oh, and the actual message is pretty weird, in a NAMBLA kind of way....

Pasta-Based Terrorism Strikes Pittsburgh Marathon
Here in New York, someone tries to set off a bomb in Times Square, and life goes on a couple hours later. In Pittsburgh, they divert the marathon after finding a microwave with some noodles inside. [WTAE]...

Mudwrestling At The Kentucky Derby
The infield scene at Churchill Downs may not be as decadent and depraved as at Pimlico these days, but the rainstorm brought a welcome twist to the action. Feisty fillies, indeed. [via Louisville.com]...

Last Night's Winner: Off-Track Betting
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like horse racing tracks, which, thanks to some lucky schlub publicly turning nothing into $900,000, should be seeing an influx of fools and their money, soon parted....

10 More Songs Notre Dame Could Have Used For Promotional Purposes
Remember that awful Notre Dame promotional video we wrote about yesterday? Well, it only seemed awful because everyone interpreted it wrong. Actually, it was kind of brilliant. My pal Nate Freeman, who knows nothing about sports, is here to explain....

Stories That Don't Suck: The Kentucky Derby Is Faulkneresque, Heartbreaking And, As Always, Decadent And Depraved
Every week, Tommy will excerpt a handful of stories - old and new, sports and otherwise, relevant and merely sublime - that he urges you to read for one reason or another. Today, I'm filling in. Still, send suggestions: [email protected]....

Guilty Verdict For Luring Bear With Pic-A-Nic Basket
A Pennsylvania man was fined $6800 for illegally using donuts to bait and kill a 700-lb. black bear last year. He'll also lose his hunting permit for three years, plenty of time to think about his Boo-Boo. [Post-Gazette]...

Touchdown Jesus Wept: Notre Dame's Promo Video Is Funky, Awful
Notre Dame, a small Bible school with one of sports' more offensive nicknames, has decided to promote its athletic program by channeling Parliament-Funkadelic. The echoes just woke up and would like Notre Dame to please keep that awful racket down. [MSF]...

Brett Favre's Selfishness Has No Offseason
So now Favre says that if he plays again, he'll have to get ankle surgery first. A simple prognosis, yet he manages to shit on both Vikings and Packers fans with it....

The Bitch Slap Heard 'Round The Bleachers
When they're not humping each other in bathrooms or throwing beer or being sorta racist, the denizens of Wrigley Field are apparently slapping each other in the face. Except they're being sorta racist then, too....

<em>Are We Winning?</em> The Book FAQ
This Tuesday, my new book, Are We Winning? Fathers and Sons and the New Golden Age of Baseball, is unleashed upon an unsuspecting populace. Since you probably don't actually have questions about it, I'll make some up and answer them....

Red Wings Fined For Violating Bizarre Airport Curfew
The Wings owe the city of San Jose some cash, all because their team flight landed in San Jose too late at night. Gamesmanship, or just a stupid law?...

Dumb Honky Radio Guy Fired For Doing On Twitter What Everyone In Sports Talk Does On Air
Bacsik, the former Nats reliever and leading demographer of the American Southwest, has been fired by KTCK-AM's parent company for all that "dirty Mexicans" business on Twitter the other day. Because sports-talk radio is no place for casual racism and half-drunk stupidity....

Could This Be The Most Blatant Dive In Soccer History?
This gem comes straight to you from the Faroe Islands, where Kaj Ennigarð of ÍF Fuglafjørður goes down like a sack of potatoes after apparently being hit by a gust of wind. It certainly wasn't the other player, that's certain....

Athlete Wives Are Just Regular Gals, <em>Washington Post</em> Keeps Reporting
The Post gives the wives of the Capitals the same incisive treatment it gave the wives of the Nationals last year. Noted: "They're striking, yes! But, in a regular kind of way." [Washington Post]...

Introducing The Sports Phella, Phil Simmons
Bill Simmons was nice enough to Tweet-lert everyone of ABCNews.com's captioning gaffe but we all know it was just to prove he gets invited to parties/smokes up with Ricky Williams. Click 'n' embiggen. [@sportsguy33]...

Listen In As Chris Cooley Gets Pulled Over While On The Phone With Radio Show
Cooley, while talking with DC's Sports Junkies on WJFK-FM, was pulled over by a cop this morning for going too wide around a corner. Pro athletes: They're just like us! (Only they manage to wriggle out of their moving violations.) [WashPost; audio]...

Easy Money: Bet On Whoever's Playing The Pirates
It's been said that you should never bet on your favorite team; you're just setting yourself up for double heartbreak. Well, one Pirates fan has concocted a fascinating experiment/get-rich-quick scheme: he's betting against the Bucs in every game this season....

Bango The Buck's Encore: Battery And Harassment
Bango — drunk with power after surviving last night's dunk — is now harassing Wisconsin's small coterie of Atlanta Hawks fans. Enjoy the dulcet tones of P.O.D. and — I hope — the use of a single Al Horford jersey. H/T Jon....